Stop, Drop and Roll!
Stop, Drop and Roll!
Remember learning this when you were a child?
It tells you how to put out a fire.
Well, the next time that you are trying to start up a new relationship and you are tempted to “Stop, Drop and Roll” for the new man in your life, think more carefully about whether or not the time is right to begin to be intimate.
There is no magic number for the number of dates, or weeks, or months to begin to be intimate with the man in question, there are many mitigating factors.
First of all, what type of a relationship are you hoping for this to develop into?
If you are just casually dating and have no desire for this to blossom into a serious relationship and would like to be physically gratified, then by all means, “Stop, Drop and Roll” for him.
However, if you are hoping that this relationship will develop into something a bit deeper, try using these keywords to determine if it is the right time to allow yourself to bond physically and psychologically with this man.
Stop. How attentive is he? Is he consistent with calling when he says he will, seeing you on a regular basis, keeping dates and making you feel wanted?
Drop. Has he dropped any other women he is dating or is he still playing the field?
Roll. Do you have fun together? Roll with laughter? Can you picture yourself rolling forward with him into the future as he is now, or do you imagine changing him as you progress?
Why do I say this? Is it because my moral barometer is set on 1950? No, not at all. Although your individual moral values will be your primary guide as to when the time is right for you, there are actually biological reasons why should consider delaying sexual gratification with a new partner.
The female brain will produce dopamine and oxytocin during sexual activity, these two hormones will cause the female to bond to the male in question due to nature’s cruel programming trick to ensure procreation of the species. We may be living in a new millennium, but our brains still function at a prehistoric level when it comes to survival of the species.
So, if you proceed with physical intimacy prior to going through the “Stop, Drop and Roll” process you may find yourself physiologically binding to a man who will not Stop being inattentive, has not Dropped other woman, and who wants to Roll in the hay with you and any other women he may be dating.
Is this what you want? Chemicals being released in your body causing you to bond to him before he is ready, willing and able to bond to you? You will be finding that even the scent of this man may set off the chemical release, causing a physiological reaction that creates a bond with a partner that is not right for you.
So, when is the right time to become physically intimate?
When he STOPS and uses his time to pursue you.
When he DROPS other women and the pursuit of other women.
When he ROLLS forward with you exclusively.
Stop, Drop and Roll will put out any flash fires and allow you to fan the flames of true love.
Set yourself up for successful relationships, Stop, Drop and Roll!
Copyright © 2008 Brigid Bishop
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*Brigid Bishop, often imitated, never duplicated*