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Boundaries

How to keep healthy boundaries in your relationships

Let's get REAL....
What are YOUR expectations when you call a reader?
Do you.....EXPECT your reader to pin point the exact time of a call coming to you?
Because IF you do, I am not sure that is REALISTIC EXPECTATION of anyone....
AND here's why....
Do YOU at the beginning of any week, PLAN the exact time and day you are going to make phone calls? Do YOU keep to every aspect of that plan IF you have made one? I KNOW I DON'T because life simply does not allow that kind of planning, except when it comes to hours of work, hours of operation for banking, opening hours for companies. Phone calls, texts and Emails do not fall under the same rules of operation in my humble opinion.
Do YOU put off making calls that may be DIFFICULT? I personally do so I assume that others MAY behave the same and avoid making a call for various reasons.
There is no ONE size fits all in behavioral realm in relationships, I feel that once love comes in the front door, common sense goes out the window....
So while NOT making excuses, one does have to look at situations REALISTICALLY and know that no one reader will always be right, because IF you think that is possible, then one may be removing the power of choice from both yourself AND others, and what kind of life would that be IF you did not have the power to change your mind at any time about anything?
I know SOMEtimes the timing is precise and exact but that cannot and will not always be the case, so being realistic when you call for a reading may in fact improve the exchange of energy between reader and caller......

Joan

Published Tuesday, March 24, 2009 7:10 AM by DruidsGlenTarot

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# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 6:02 AM

well said!

justaskdrdonna

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 6:25 AM

Absolutely! Im glad you posted this Joan. Especially because you wisely mentioned that not having these expectations from a reader will only improve the exchange of energy between the client and reader - Therfore making for a more in depth reading, That allowes the reader to tap into more things that trully MATTER in the long run.

PSYCHIC SILVANA FILLMORE

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 6:34 AM

I think that some callers think that we can control the person that they are asking about. i call it the " magic wand " effect. When we get that one star because he did not call, it is like saying it is our fault that he did not call. I know that receiving the call is like getting a fix but it is a dangerous fix.

justaskdrdonna

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 7:06 AM

Please repete post this one....!  thnak you so much for this blog, I knew being an advisor would bring some of this type of thing, but till recently had no idea just how much.  As psychics we are human, and can offten only see what I believe will not effect freewill, and important life lessons.  Thank you again!

Tay between worlds

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 7:21 AM

Callers seem to be of the opinion that free will is a cop out EXCUSE and what we need to understand IS that IF we want the power to choose things for ourselves, shouldn't others have that power also? With no EXCUSE needed?
Joan

DruidsGlenTarot

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 7:51 AM

You nailed this one Joan, this is the truth. Sometimes you are meant to be floored with exacts and sometimes there is another lesson to see when it comes to timing. Depends on what is needed for us at that time. When someone is open AND NOT hanging on you may be amazed at what happens. Thanks for this today for it was very true.

Hugs,
Donna

GIFTED11

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 7:55 AM

We can ask the cards whatever question we desire, but that does not mean we will get a response to that specific question, the cards tell us what we NEED to KNOW, not what we want to sometimes, and we have to understand and respect the difference.
Joan

DruidsGlenTarot

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 8:50 AM

Well, then lets get down to the real issue here: If someone is calling repeatedly wanting to know when they will get that 'call', Should'nt we as healers and ethical advisors address that issues with the caller?
From what I learnt in Psychology / Life management Class,Such obssessive behaviour demonstrates a deep insecurity and a very low self esteem..Since we know that much, I feel its our responsibility as readers to gently point that out to our callers..

PSYCHIC SILVANA FILLMORE

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 9:32 AM

I am in total agreement as sometimes the issues that we struggle with are somehow more to do with the person themselves. And I do believe that as a reader it is part and parcel of our ethical duty to address such things as when we are waiting for something that does not occur over time, we have to re-consider and re-think the situation and look at giving ourselves *closure* on that issue, and when we are okay with the possibility of the person NOT coming back that it frees up the energy for it to actually happen but NOT always

Joan

DruidsGlenTarot

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 10, 2009 8:26 PM

dear Silvana, I agree with you.Gently is the key for sure due to some having a low self esteem, we have to be caring enough not to make them feel attacked or worse. I hope every advisor remembers to be gentle. It can really help a caller because sometimes we are the only ones that they have to talk to.

justaskdrdonna

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Wednesday, March 11, 2009 3:35 AM

It depends on what kind of relationship that you have with the caller, how long they have been calling and many other factors such as how long they are going to be on the call. They have not  called us for a counseling session, and may not be interested in one no matter how gentle we are. However some issues can be addressed IF a prediction has not come to pass within several time frames being given. Or if you notice the caller has called many readers in a very short time frame. I for one will not give time frame after time frame IF they have not manifested, there is a deeper issue going on such as the possibility of interference of the caller, over kill on thinking and obsessing and the possibility of the person thinking about and not taking it.
SO many things can and do interfere, so after a while we have to re-think the issue of prediction and work on a new way to deal with it for both you as the reader and  the caller... It's not healthy to continue waiting ( I KNOW I DID wait for a long time for a call  that did NOT come) and it was only when I gave up and was OKAY without it (it was my own choice to wait and I NOW accept that) that the situation righted itself and that was WITHOUT my interference, dependence, obsessing upon, and it righted itself on it's own. The universe does have a sense of humor, and like they say in Ireland *What's for you, will not pass you by* it just might not be on YOUR time frame or in the way YOU want.....but it usually works out for the best in the long term..
joan

DruidsGlenTarot

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Wednesday, March 11, 2009 7:34 AM

You can only give what you are getting to give, sometimes a person is meant to witness an actual "miracle" time frame at the moment. Not everyone has the same process going on and not everyone will get an exact. Things can change and people change their mind. If you have someone in limbo and they want to call you and are thinking about you, but- they choose not to and are able to hold out even longer. that is a work in progress and there is no control from us(reader) to make it happen we can only tell you(client) what is happeing from what we get. Yes, sometimes people obsess and sometimes people have low self esteem, sometimes people are really hurting, but- this is a process and is in divine order as something is getting ready to materialise(birth) out of this whole situation.

GIFTED11

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Wednesday, March 11, 2009 8:11 AM

It is not within our power to make another come forward to make a call or reconcile with someone, I wish it was...and yes we all hurt sometimes, but in that pain, we grow whether we want to or not and usually come out the better :-) whether want to or not usually is of no concern to the universe, it knows better than us and for us...
joan

DruidsGlenTarot

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 24, 2009 9:47 AM

The Universe does have a sense of HUMOR.

And we all know it is much easier to focus on another, than ourselves.

Little White Witch

# re: Let's get REAL.... @ Tuesday, March 24, 2009 12:22 PM

Much easier to point the finger of blame...
than to work out what part we played. Much easier to assume that the fault completely lies with another than ourselves.
I can take responsibility when a prediction did not occur within a time frame, SOME times I get it wrong, and the universe really does have a great sense of humor...and knows what is best for us and if we go around bashing people and expect the universe to come through for us when we are not living honestly, that just AIN'T gonna happen...
Joan

DruidsGlenTarot

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