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Use Sparingly.....

Aah the power of the BLOCK option..... the power to over react to a wrong word, a phone call that didn't come or the one that did and ended badly....or the email that may have told you a few home truths that you did NOT care to hear......do you need to get the last word in or can you not be reactive ( which is what the sender may have intended ) and just ignore?

That seems to get a stronger response...if you do not react at all. It seems to bring out anger in some..... I try to not react as when you see how far on the other side of an issue a person is, you may know instinctively that you cannot and will not change the mind of the person... so silence is louder in my humble opinion. There is no one going to win when you get into the *Oh yes you did* and *oh no you didn't* part of an issue, I tend to avoid those.

For me personally I use the block option sparingly, as it seems as if it is an act of finality and if it is used only for dramatic effect it may in fact lose it's power. Some like to block and unblock depending on the reaction of the block. Some block sparingly and as a last resort. Some use it to not allow a person to have their say, after having their OWN say on a matter. Some LOVE the power of the Final Word....

It's not just keen I speak of that has that block option...
Face book has it. Some cell phones have it. Buddy lists have it. Keen has it. Some use it to maintain power so you cannot speak your piece. Some of us do not care to have the last word as when there is such a big difference between how we see a situation and the way the others do, that no matter how much effort and energy, we invest into giving our last word....it will not change how the other sees it so why try? LOL

Joan

Published Thursday, September 10, 2009 5:53 PM by DruidsGlenTarot

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# re: Use Sparingly..... @ Thursday, September 10, 2009 3:22 PM

This is an interesting and valuable observation. For myself, I use the block option as a way to disconnect from energy that is too hurtful or toxic. I have found that some individuals leave horrific feedback as a way to get even with the advisor, it is a way they discharge their anger at someone or something else often. Yet, that horrific feedback has serious negative consequences for us. I have found that giving such a client continued access to us continues the issue. A few don't mind spending two minutes simply for the pleasure of leaving bad feedback. The block is the only way to obviate this to a certain extent. Yet, you can also find that the caller will switch to a different screen name to do it again. The block option is at times our only protection. It is often the advisor giving himself/herself distance from something that is too painful. We are here to serve, we are not here to take abuse and no matter now we try to keep compassion in our hearts, there are times that abuse can get to the advisor.

Anna Maria Gabriel

# re: Use Sparingly..... @ Thursday, September 10, 2009 3:43 PM

Yes, disconnecting from a toxic relationship is valuable whether it be from a caller or a lover or even a friend. And while we all get negative feedback whether we feel we deserve it or not it is the right of callers to leave it. The feedback at times says more about the caller than the feedback if it is surrounded by stellar feedback. While it can be hard to maintain compassion, one can surely try?

Joan

DruidsGlenTarot

# re: Use Sparingly..... @ Thursday, September 10, 2009 3:53 PM

This is an excellent blog Joan and topic that is of interest to a lot of people. I have used the "block" option sparingly also and like LadyIgrainne explained it is not always useful as the person that leaves bad feedback can and do sign in with new names and will continue to harass if they feel like it. There have been times I felt the necessity of using it but in the years I have been on Keen not to often thankfully. I never like doing it and it distresses me that is the only option we have to not take calls from those who are out to do harm against our business. In a regular store front business you have the option of banning a person from your premises if they are destructive but on the internet that is not the case. I look at those who leave one star feedback on Keen and If I see their names come up on the call monitor I would rather just take a deduction for a missed call rather than deal with someone who truly does not want a reading but has an agenda like lets "test the psychic" etc.

If we feel we have no other recourse then of course we have to block the person but sometimes I have found that the one who leaves bad feedback will come back at a later time and admit they were wrong. When we block we usually cut off that avenue. Still I feel it is a necessary "evil" in a lot of ways and I have to admit I have had to use it on occasion.

Great blog Joan as usual and thanks for giving us something else to think about.

Rosie

Rosalea

# re: Use Sparingly..... @ Thursday, September 10, 2009 4:01 PM

I feel the same about the issue of blocking a one star caller, I think it can cut off what could be in a future contact where you were right and told them what they may not have wanted to or be ready to hear...
Joan