Do you feel that you’re going mad? All around you people are starting to talk about the upcoming holidays as if they are the greatest thing ever, while for you they are most miserable time of the year. Is there something wrong with you? Take comfort! You are not alone.

 

For many people, the holidays are a reminder of things best forgotten – a miserable childhood; the loss of loved ones; loneliness; financial stress and family tensions. They put on a brave face and say the right things, but inside they are really unhappy, and the fear that they are the only ones feeling like that makes it even worse.

 

We are supposed to go along with the “happy holidays” fiction. It isn’t good manners to rain on other people’s parades. As a result we live in a psychologically bad place. The real fiction at Christmas time isn’t Santa Claus, it’s the whole “happy holidays” illusion.

 

To survive the holidays better, be honest with yourself. Admit that it isn’t a good time for you. Stop trying to pretend that all is well when it isn’t. Instead of putting energy into maintaining the smiling mask, look at ways to get through the season without compromising your sanity.

 

One of the tried and true methods is to work with people worse off than you are. Volunteer to help out at a shelter or an old people’s facility. Make some craft items to give away, and come to agreements with others NOT to give gifts you can’t really afford. Opt out of family gatherings that you know will make you miserable. Instead of spending money on people you don’t really like, buy yourself a small treat instead. Visit a toy shop and buy yourself the gift you never got – it’s never too late to have a happy childhood.

 

When you look around you, don’t imagine that everyone else is happy and you aren’t. I’ve been a reader for more than 15 years with a unique insight into what really goes on in people’s heads at this time of year, and I can assure you that it isn’t pretty! So be reassured that you aren’t going mad. It’s the rest of the world that’s crazy!