You broke up with your man. You miss the guy. After several days (or weeks, or months…) the phone rings. It’s Him! “Have you seen my red socks?” he asks. What the heck is going on here?

 

It’s a boy thing. It comes with the blue booties. Guys hate to lay their egos on the line. Rather than risk rejection, they find excuses to make contact, so if they get the cold shoulder they haven’t really risked anything.

 

What he is actually trying to do is to take your emotional temperature. Is it hot, cold, or freezing? He is looking for you to gloss over what has happened and start afresh if you give any indication you are prepared to make up.

 

What more often results is that because the recipient of the call is bewildered (“What DOES he want???”) he gets a response that doesn’t get him anywhere. You end up walking around each other, getting more and more frustrated.

 

If you want to mend your fences with him, the correct response to: “Have you seen my red socks?” is not “I threw them in the trash!” but “Hey, nice to hear from you! How are you doing?” Smooth the way for his peacemaking attempts. Don’t make it harder for him, or he will likely give up trying.

 

Yes, it’s frustrating. But as I said, it’s a guy thing. Nuff said!

 

PS: I really enjoyed the feedback I got from one caller. I gave her the heads up that she was about to receive one of these calls, and she phoned me to tell me it wasn’t his red socks – it was the manual for the coffee maker.