Drive-By Insults - Hit or Miss?
What do you do when your ex
continues to leave childish comments on your Facebook site? The
temptation is there to retaliate, to be defensive, and to tell the jerk where to go... The question is - WHY is he doing this to you? WHY, when you've
clearly moved on to a much better life, would he continue to TRY and
engage you by reaching into old buttons to press?(The ones that you hopefully destroyed).
He unceremoniously discards you over a YEAR ago, and yet does these
drive-by hits with little insults and innuendos. It's all you can do to
maintain control and NOT respond to anything, because THIS is what he
wants: to get a reaction. If you're still REACTING to him then there
must be something there... right? Um, NO.
I get this ALL the time from confused callers. "What does this mean?
What does he want?" The relationship disintegrated because the dude was
just mean and didn't respect you. Now he is furthering his torment of
you writing sarcastic commentary about your new life (which you are
truly happy with) and attempting to belittle you even more. What does
he want? He wants a REACTION. He wants to know that he can and is still
in control of you and your predictable reactions.
THIS is the reason that God created the "Delete" key on your computer.
No, he doesn't want you "back". No, he doesn't want to resume the
relationship with you. He wants you to feel miserable. How could you
possibly create a NEW and FUN and EXCITING life? Afterall, he left you
devastated, right? And, here you have the audacity to pick up the
pieces of your soul that he ripped apart and be HAPPY!
When you get a "drive-by" hit on your blog, your space, your Facebook
site, whatever site you have that is public where any scum can leave
commentary - use what God gifted you to use: the DELETE key, and give
no further thought to it. He's only proving to you how mean and abusive
he was to you, and certainly don't think for one minute that he wants
you back. He only wants you to be miserable. Ignoring the comments will
cut him deeper than if you were to respond with an equally insulting
comment. Trust me.
And, here it is the 8th day of Christmas, and I just don't get it. Where ARE those 8 maids a milking? I got cows out here that have come home moooooo-ing all over!
Happy Holidays! Available for your calls today,
Sending you angels,
Jane