If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck, right? 

 
Wrong.  Love isn't logical.  Aside from the fact that I would be out of a job if it was, we'd all be happily sitting with the perfect little logical person for us, bored to tears, or perhaps helping the homicide rate go up.
 
It's so strange, because sometimes I get calls inquiring why the guy hasn't called.  Logically, if the guy doesn't call, your friend is going to tell you,  he's just not that into you.  And I'm going to tell you, here and now, that may be absolutely true, or it may not.
 
The odd thing is, when I peer in that guy's beady little brain, after I dig through the cobwebs and push aside the thoughts of remote controls and ESPN to find out why he didn't call, sometimes I see that he didn't call not because he didn't like you, but that he liked you too much and is fearful.  Or perhaps he waited too long to call, and mistakenly thinking you had a life, he was totally unaware that you've been sitting next to the phone for the past two weeks screaming, "Ring, ring," and he's too embarrassed to call now.  Other times, I discover that his mind is on business because, well, he needs to spend his money on stupid stuff like food and rent.  Still others, it's a matter of, well, his wife just won't let him.
 
What I'm trying to say, there are a multitude of reasons why a guy doesn't call, and it isn't always that he's just not that into you.  Of course sometimes it is.  Believe me, I've had callers that haven't heard from the guy in ten years, or were calling because they felt a real connection with the boy they sat next to in kindergarten, or think someone on television is sending them secret messages.  In those cases, that loud quacking isn't just the AFLAC duck.
 
Now I have to say, I really loathe telling someone that the guy was "busy."  I don't accept "busy."  I hate "busy."  I mean really, if you want to do something, you can find one minute out of your day to do it, can't you?  Maybe if you're a woman.  As Grandma used to say, "If you want something done, give it to a busy person."  But, fact also is, most guys are not good at multi-tasking and I've looked into a situation to find that the guy intends to call, when things lighten up.
 
The strangest difference I've noticed between men and women is that if a woman hasn't heard from the guy in three days, she's calling, "I haven't heard from him in three days.  What's wrong?"  Again, I look into his brain and see, "Wow, she's great.  I really love how secure she is and how she just knows how I feel about her.  I've been thinking a lot about her the last three days.  Maybe I'll call her tomorrow."
 
Tomorrow?  What's this tomorrow caca?  If he really cared, he would have called three days ago!  Not necessarily.  Again, no quacking here. 
 
So if he doesn't call right away, or doesn't call at all, you can't always jump to the logical conclusion. Mars, Venus, I don't care what planet we're from, men really are a completely different breed of animal, perhaps a horse (and depending on the guy, sometimes not the front end of one), but they're definitely not a duck. 
 
Quack.