Did you ever look around and everyone else has boyfriends, is getting married, is having a baby? They're all deliriously happy, and you are the only loveless, lonely, unwanted person around.

 
Yeah, right.  Did you ever stop to think that half the marriages end up in divorce, and that's not even counting the couples that are staying together even when they're miserable because, to channel Neil Sedaka, breaking up is hard to do?
 
Sooooo, does that mean everyone except you is deliriously happy?  Hmmmmm.  I don't think so. 
 
Presently, I know of one person who is getting married to someone who beats her, but hey, she's going to have a reallllly nice wedding.  I know of another who was entertaining a future with someone that everybody hated, even her animals, but he seemed good on paper, was the right age, right socio-economic class,  and her eggs were screaming, "Time's a-wasting!"
 
Is it really worth it?  Take the woman who is marrying someone abusive.  Yep, she is having a lovely big wedding that she is having so much fun planning and she feels soooo important.  Mom is proud, Dad is giving his little baby her day as Princess of the Free World.  But what happens then?  You don't have to be psychic to know the answer to that one.
 
The one with the guy everyone hated?  Gee, I was worried I was going to have to get her a lifetime supply of Urine-B-Gone for a wedding present since her cats got so mad everytime this guy walked in the door they peed all over the place in protest. (Hint:  If your mom hates him, he just might be the man of your dreams; if your animals hate him, get a clue.  Run, don't walk to the nearest exit).
 
Why are we willing to settle?  It's easy.  It's just basic human instinct to want love.  And when "everyone else" seems so very happy and your mom is making remarks about coming over on Saturday night for a rousing game of Old Maid, we want some, too.  But think about it.  Would you really want that guy that your best friend is marrying?  I mean, the dude chews with his mouth open, farts, scratches and yells, "Yo, baby" at every passing female.  Do you really want a piece of that just because he's willing to commit? 
 
This is not a "One Size Fits All" proposition.  Although all relationships go through periods where we adapt and change (it's called "compromise" - everybody say "oooooooh") so the two pieces can form a good whole, trying to stick a square peg in a round hole just is never going to be a good fit.  In other words, you can compromise by not going ballistic if he leaves a sock on the ground and he can learn to put the toilet seat down, but you don't compromise to accept a beating or any other disrespectful behavior.
 
What's right for your friend is not necessarily right for you -- hell, it may not even be right for them.  Don't be in such a hurry for bliss that you're willing to accept anyone other than Mr. Right For Me.
 
So if that weird dude whose idea of a great date is examining his carpet fiber collection asks you out, stay home.  Take a bubble bath.  Give yourself a pedicure.  Bake a loaf of bread.  Read to the blind.  Do something worthwhile - well, besides keeping your mother up nights worrying about her baby being an old maid.  That's just an extra added bonus.
 
*** To those of you who have called or written me recently to say you enjoy my blogs, I am sooooo overwhelmed and appreciative.  And to the Oreo girls, luv ya, but can we switch to Milanos or something today?