For a rare moment last evening, I was listening to "the Professor", I do that on occasion. After cutting through all the blatant macho B.S. I am usually able to gain some really good insight on the male perspective. For those of you who have no clue who "the Professor" is, allow me the enlightenment. The Professor, who really isn't a professor at all is a syndicated radio talk show host in sunny So-Cal, by the name of Tom Leykis. He is called "the Professor" because, in his own words, he teaches women how men think. For the most part, I agree with him. Probably for the simple fact, I was raised in an all male environment. I have 5 brothers and no sisters and have been surrounded predominantly by males since birth. I too have always had a strong grasp of how men think.

My very best friend the amazing LadyRaven_39, years ago before she knew me, made a comment to another friend about my being a bit gender confused. I never laughed so hard in my life. Number 1...... it's partially true. Oh I am fully a woman, no confusion there, I however, have always played in the mens world for as long as I can remember. Which is very much a bonus for my clients.

Just before I was ready to turn off the radio and head upstairs, he did this segment on the study, "Romantic Comedies Ruining Relationships". I actually did turn off the radio and went upstairs. But I turned it on again when I got upstairs. Why?? Because I totally agree with this study and have since long before that gawd awful movie, "Pretty Woman", came out in the 80's Now that I think about it, those unreal expectations, most likely began with the dawn of the bodice ripping romance novel revolution, mostly written from a womans unreal perception of what true love should be.

I got to thinking right before I wrote my blog on Searching For Perfection, In An Imperfect World, after seeing a Heather Locklear movie trailor. Another one of those "Yeah.... that happens in real life", moments to ponder. It's always the same regurgitated pile. Our heroine, and pick any one of them, Heather, Valerie Bertinelli, Terri Hatcher, etc., innocently gets dumped by that lout of a husband she married. Now she must continue bravely on, albeit broken hearted to make a success of her life. Then suddenly.... in walks the handsome savior, who can't quite get through the door at first due to the wall of pain she has put up. But he's persistant, this dashing stranger. Because he knows his love will heal all her life's woes, ad nauseum. Trust me.... most of the men I know would run into that wall of pain and say, "What's the point........ to many issues......... to much anger........NEXT!!!"

Then I hear the Professor bringing up this study relating how Romantic Comedies can spoil your love life.

"Watching romantic comedies can spoil your love life, a study by a university in Edinburgh has claimed."

Dr Bjarne Holmes, Heriot Watt University, says,

"The problem is that while most of us know that the idea of a perfect relationship is unrealistic, some of us are still more influenced by media portrayals than we realise"

To read the full article, *~click here~*.

I recently read a joke that was sent to me by a male friend. It was a long list about how to make and keep your man or woman happy. For the women, the list had a great number of the most hard to achieve things imaginable on it. It just continued to get longer and longer. I had so many eyeball rolling moments and laughed all the way through it. It really makes one think though. A lot of women, unfortunately really believe the stuff on that list. Further that it will just magickally appear in the incredibly handsome, young and rich man, who really does love the woman. Of course some of them were ridicules points for humour's sake, but it did point out some pretty serious character flaws held onto by a lot of the ladies regarding unrealistic expectations.

I like the mens list, it was so much more simple to achieve. The list consisted of only these two things.

1. Show up naked.

2. Bring Food

Now how real is that.......... simple huh??? Now I'm not implying that is all men want, it was just a silly joke after all. What I am saying is that real life is not some smarmy Hollywood version of happily ever after. Even if and when you find the right mate and partner for you, don't just expect him to know what it is you want and need. Please ladies..... he's so NOT your savior, he is a normal man who does not have the ability to read your mind. He doesn't know what it is that you want unless you tell him. If you test him, test him and test him, you just cannot expect him to live "happily ever after" with you in your perfect little unrealistic Hollywood version of life. That's just way too much drama for him. 

Relationships are hard enough, don't make it harder for him by holding on to what the most recent movie of the week wants you to believe.  That version of love and life is a total myth, it's just  advertising your box of Cheerios or maxi pads.  Which by the way, the Professor clearly states over and over again, that his radio program is a means to sell advertising.  The Professor does indeed sell lots of advertising.

Below are some more articles regarding the same study.

*~The Huffington Post~*.
*~Movies & T.V. On Squidoo~*.

Peace out friends,
Margaret