Reduced Rates.... "WHEN TEENAGERS ARE OUT OF CONTROL"
My availability schedule today is going to change. I will be available until 1:30 pm today, and then I will be heading out to celebrate a birthday with my stepfather, and I should return by 5 pm and be available until 10 pm EST . I have reduced my rates to $1.59.
You can arrange an appointment with me, or call someone from my group, VICTORIOUS ENVISIONARIES.
As I have mentioned in a previous blog, I do have five children. One of my children is on his own at nineteen years old and he is out of control. His choice has been to learn the hard way, break all the rules, and try to get away with whatever he can. I certainly have not taught him to act this way, but he chose his friends... many who have a probation officier or have defied their parents. He's also chosen to live wrecklessly, and often I feel he is on self destruct mode. He's looking for love in all the wrong places, and after having his heart broken once he seems to have given up on himself.
One thing I have learned is that I can not make my child make good choices or even make him change his course. I can set firm boundaries, remind him that I love him even when his choices are not the right ones, and remind him that I will be here when he decides to change his path. It is one of the toughest things to observe. Since leaving home he has a probation officier, has lost his driver's license, and now chooses to live moving from one friends house to another even after I told him he could come home and have a fresh start. He will say he knows more about the streets than I ever will, and he smiles when he says this. I'm concerned about his safety, but I also realize I can not control him or even change him.
Many people I talk to are in relationships with someone who is out of control. The key is not changing the other person... it's changing what YOU can in your own life. We can give advise, we can offer to help people, but we can't make anyone accept our help or even advice. We can give love, but often it's up to the other person to love themselves and want to change their own paths. It's often not about us, but about the other person who is on their own path of learning.
I've learned a lot from the Love and Logic Institute online. I highly recommend reading some of their material. My favorite phrases are: I love you too much to argue. Sure you can do that, but what will the outcome be? If you are looking for material on raising kids, check it out online!
It certainly isn't easy raising teenagers. I think the next book I will be checking out is called "Tough Love". I'm praying my son will make better choices and decide to come back home in the next week. I know that if he doesn't want to change his course, he will continue to do what he is doing. I can only love him and pray he makes better choices soon.