Working on Faith or Fear?
Thank you for all the prayers for our little guy, Noah. He visited the pediatric cardiologist and they did an EKG on him. Today we were told that it was good, but that he would have to come back every year because as he grows he may have an irregular heart beat. Of course, I came home and jumped on the internet to look up this condition and I found a lawsuit on the device they used to close off one of Noah's holes in his heart.
Many people who call me begin thinking using fear as their base for choices. "What if" is often behind their thinking, among other negative phrases that keep us stuck. Today I could have sat back and focused on all the "what if's" or "if only's", but I know fear will get us no where. I adopted this little guy on faith and it's going to take a lot of faith to live each day knowing each day is certainly a gift. Sure things can go wrong in our lives, but when we make choices from a loving perspective we begin to take down the walls and that opens up doors. I've had people ask me why would I want to take on adopting a special needs child like Noah, and my answer is simply WHY NOT? He deserves to be loved like all of us regardless of his limitations or physical conditions. So when you sit back wondering if you should take a chance maybe "Why not" should be used instead of "what if". I believe it's better to risk it all than to be an old lady in a rocking chair wishing I would have just found the courage. What's the worst thing that can happen?
I know that personally I can lose a child due to his medical condition, but when I adopted him I knew the GAIN far outweighed any loss. If tomorrow didn't come for one of us, I know our time together couldn't be bought or replaced. Noah is the joy of my heart, and he certainly made me realize a few things. I'm a lot stronger than I ever imagined, and when I see this little four year old running through my house my heart smiles. He's filled a void in our hearts. Noah is considered to be high functioning, but as his adoptive mom I see a little boy not his limits.
So my message to you today is focus on the good, and find the positives in your life. Focus on your strengths! Instead of making choices based on fear, make choices in faith and trusting you can't LOSE. It's all in how you think. Even a relationship that doesn't work out is a gain if you can see it as a learning experience and focus on the positives. I remember reading an article online that a child with Down syndrome is like a trip to Holland. Maybe it's not where you want or expect to go, but by going there you meet people you would have never met, you get to explore a whole new area, and you learn along the way. Life is an adventure no matter which path you choose to take. I certainly feel we can learn so much from kids like Noah. They don't focus on their problems and what can go wrong. They love unconditionally, and they certainly face many obstacles and limitations.
My wish for Noah is that he makes it to Disney World by next year without any further heart problems. This little guy lights up like a light bulb when he sees "Mickey Mouse Club House". Every night we tuck him in with Goofy, Mickey, and Jimminy Cricket to say his prayers. He always remembers his friends even when we may overlook one. However, as I think about tucking him in and making his dreams come true there is nothing in this world like hearing "I love you Mommy." or getting one of his eskimo kisses. It just makes life a little sweeter!
God bless,
Miss Serenity Star
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