Friday, May 17, 2013 4:58 AM
Zodiac: Crabby Cancer
Ah, yes, cancer men. You can't live with them, can't live without them. I could outline what is circling them this week/month, but eh, that's tedious and honestly, quite boring. What I will do is tell you exactly what to expect and how to handle it.
Cancer men love being in love, and they often mistake infatuation for love. They idealize a great deal and they actually see things, most of the time, through rose colored glasses. And, when things start to unravel, they quickly try to control it and push it back to where it once was.
They can be, what appears to be egocentric , when really it has a lot to do with masking their fear and insecurity about something, and they tend to over-think things, become sullen, then retract into their crablike shell leaving you wondering "wth?".
Cancer men are moody and can change in an instant. They seek out validation everywhere. They want attention constantly from the object of their affection, and praise, and they will either try to get this attention through sending roses to your work so your entire office thinks they are amazing; working overtime at work so their boss thinks their amazing; or being their child's soccer coach so the community thinks they are amazing. What most cancer men don't seem to know is if they just had faith in themselves and who they are, they would see they already possess what it takes to be amazing. When a cancer man is secure, and is confident, he is rather charming, doting, devoted and intensely loving.
A CANCER MAN IN LOVE
A Cancer man in love is like watching a romantic movie in black and white. They have a tendency to fall hard and fast, and when they do, watch out. If you're the object of their desire, expect flowers, candy and a mix CD delivered to your house personally. They like to see your reaction, they want validation. They can be a bit overwhelming and aggressive when they truly want you. They also have a tendency to morph into whatever it is you are. They like to be exactly what it is THEY think a woman wants, and needs. It's as if you're being wooed by Cary Grant, and you are quickly swept up. They can keep up this facade for a very long time. It's not that it's fictitious. It is real, and it is genuine. They really do want you. But keep in mind a Cancer tends to fall in love with what is before them, believing it's love, and quickly, they can change if they've rushed too quickly or they realized it was an illusion.
Now, I know there are exceptions here, and we must always remember there are other factors in a persons zodiac sign, such as their rising sign, their moon, etc...but the basic Cancer male zodiac nature is to settle down, and find security and stability. But, they are glutenous for attention, validation and praise. If he takes out the garbage, for the love of goddess, praise him. If he fixes the toaster, praise him. If he makes macaroni and cheese, praise him. Or, you're going to see your loving, romantic, accommodating Cancer male retract, withdraw and pout.
There's ain't nothing worse than a pouty Cancer. Do not let his mood shifts affect you, for as quickly as he sulks and pouts, he can pull out of it. There are some Cancer's that will go all out to get your attention when they are moody. They will slam doors, bang countertops, etc, but the majority just grumble. Don't try to yank them out of this mood. They can't be pulled from it til they are ready.
Cancer men are also quite guarded. They will appear to be stingy, selfish, and sneaky. The fact is they don't trust too readily and they have a high level of suspicion. They work hard for what they have and they aren't too quick to hand things over. But, when this man falls in love, or cares for others, he willingly shares and is generous. Unless he is suspect of your agenda. He's constantly paranoid as well. He is always thinking someone is out to get him, take from him, swindle him and use him. He's made these assumptions due to observing the world around him and due to past experiences of his own life and others. Again, he's highly intuitive, so he is a bit leery.
Cancer men are also highly intuitive. Their natural intuition is powerful and they can read people rather quickly and well, so long as they don't allow their insecurities and fear to get in their way.
If you are in love with a Cancer male I will tell you what you need to do to have a healthy, happy relationship with him.
You need to be respectful. Never embarrass your Cancer lover or reprimand him as if he's a child. This will make him behave like one should you do so. He will retract, recoil and if pushed enough he will attack and hit you harder than you hit him, going for your jugular.
You need to praise him and shower him with affection. But you must be able to read when he wants affection. This man doesn't like clingy people, yet he clings, so figure that one out. You have to know when to touch and when not to. He's usually demonstrative and will reach out when he is seeking affection, there's a clue.
You need to be honest. Not brutally honest, but direct and never lie. If they catch you in a lie, it will be difficult to rebuild his trust again, and he will always question you.
Even though you want to praise and shower him with love and affection these men like a bit of mystery. They like to be the pursuer. Don't change your plans last minute to accommodate him and his desires. He always wants what he can't have and if he finds out you're going out with the girls he may try to throw a wrench in it and get you to be with him. If you do this once, he'll do it to you a hundred times, as this man is jealous and possessive. He's great at masking it, and comes across as indifferent, but make no mistake he is definitely jealous and possessive of that which he holds dear. Be just a bit out of reach and let him pursue you and create an air of mystery.
Never take anyone else's side over his, at least not in public. Stand as a united front and maybe discuss your disagreement in private, but never, ever speak out against him to others. This is a huge deal breaker with him. He finds it disloyal and that is a no-no.
He's private and he is also someone that only shows others what he wants them to see. He can be a man of many masks and personalities depending on whom he's around at the time. Keep an eye out for this because if you are disgusted by a person who isn't truly himself then this man will probably anger, or confuse you.
If you are just starting out with this man, and still dating others, don't tell him, he is not one that likes competition in love.
Don't expose too much to him in the beginning. You want him to be who he is, not what he's created just to impress you.
Be neat, clean and tidy. Cancer's, in general, suffer a bit from OCD and they cannot tolerate a messy, disorganized, or cluttered home. Their home is their castle and it must be comfortable, presentable and cleansed. If it isn't you will see them take charge and clean. Cancer men are not beyond washing dishes, doing laundry or scrubbing a floor. They are perfectly willing to share the tasks.
They love women who are feminine, but also a lady who can be one of the guys. These men, though they love the comforts of home, are active and enjoy many activities where you can accompany him. He likes to play sports, or at least watch them, and he will want you there, cheering him on. He likes a girl who isn't so hung up on her appearance that she can't throw on some jeans, pull her hair into a pony tail and just get up and go. He admires beauty in a woman, but he also likes natural beauty. He also likes intelligence.
If he has made it clear he doesn't like one of your friends, simply don't mention her in his presence. You need not drop her like a safe, but don't expect them to get along because he can, and will be rude, if forced into into this position.
If you don't like one of his friends, tell him, but don't insult him. Cancer men are pretty loyal to those they care about. Just so you know.
Don't tell him any secrets. Though he's good at keeping his own, he will only keep your secrets for as long as you two are happy and together. Once the relationship is over he'll run his damn mouth to anyone who will listen. He's horrible at keeping other's secrets and is like a chick when it comes to gossip. He loves to hear other's dirt.
WHEN A CANCER MAN IS NOT INTERESTED
Cancer men seduce and they seduce those they aren't even interested in. They like attention (I'm saying this again) and they will be romantic, polite and sweet. But, if a cancer man is not interested in you, he's not beyond sleeping with you for sport. He may find you attractive and desire you sexually, but he's clear that is all it is. He makes it clear by not calling. And when he does "just show up" on your front door, he is not wanting idle chatter, he wants sex. He leaves before the condom is off and he rarely looks you in the eye. He's not good at hiding his agenda unless he's wanting to impress you. He won't care what you think of him if he's not interested and he has no problem flaunting his other relationships in your face. He won't take you out, or spend any money on you whatsoever, and he will never give you a time as to when you will hear from him or see him again. He will leave you breathless and wanting more, and will ignore you until he is aroused again and there are no other options around. This man has no problem walking away from a woman he feels nothing for. And he won't even avoid you or evade your presence, he'll simply ignore you without remorse. He can be cutting and brutal if you corner him, worse than a Leo, in my opinion.
Don't try to get his attention by making him jealous. He'll see right through it and he will laugh at you, and if you are obnoxious about it, he'll point it out and humiliate you. Don't try to appeal to his kind heart, he will feel badly that you are hurting, but it won't change his actions. You can't guilt this man into changing his mind. Don't try to buy this man either, because he'll take the watch you give him for his birthday and wear it for his date with one of your friends. You can't manipulate this man.
If he has ended the relationship know one thing, he doesn't like to be alone. You may not see him with other women, or hear of it, but rest assured he's either prowling or already has his sights set on another and he's working it. Cancer men tend to find other lovers, or other interests and bait and secure a new relationship before they leave the one they are in. They have that strong of a disdain for being alone. If he ends the relationship it is over. He's pretty sure he wants out. I'm not talking about a blow out where you both say mean things. I'm talking about if he has packed his stuff and left, he's definitely gone. BUT...and this is a big but, even though the relationship is over, it doesn't mean he won't stop by again for some slap and tickle should his new love interest fall flat, or he finds a lack of out there. Don't sleep with him. Don't think he's back. He's only making a pit stop. Once a Cancer man ends it with you, consider it over, because if you think he's stopping by at 2 a.m. because he can't get you out of his mind, you're wrong. If a Cancer man wants to reconcile it won't be in the form of a booty call. He will try to reconcile along the same lines as he did when he was wooing you in the beginning with the flowers, candy and intimate dining.