Relationship broken? Tools to repair it!

It’s true.  Let’s be honest.  You love us.  If you didn’t you wouldn’t be reading blogs on Keen telling you how to deal with us.

One of the first things to think about is that you love us…..but you hate our behavior.  Women amaze me.  They multi-task and are in control and find our lost socks, cook a meal while talking on the phone, co-ordinate the kids after school activities and make our measly paychecks stretch from payday to payday without missing a beat.  No wonder God was smart enough to let Women have the children.

It’s hard to understand us.  We can tell another guy every winning Superbowl teams stats but we forget how to tell you how much we value you in our lives.  Women need to hear those words you know.  It doesn’t dawn on we men how much value you place in those three little words. Little secret here?  We ASSUME you know.  How many times have you asked a man, “Do you love me?” only to hear something along the lines of ‘well, if I didn’t I wouldn’t be here would I?’  And beware of the guy who knows you a whole three minutes and protests his ‘undying love’.  He’s out to get something and it isn’t a committed relationship.

Truth is, we men want relationships.  But we’re afraid that ‘awful, ugly thing’ will happen if we have one, so we’re forever doing the chicken dance of one step forward and two backwards and driving you up the wall with our “I’ll call you” which could mean ‘in this lifetime’ when you’re translating it to the next few days.  In short, we haven’t learned how to put words to feelings and especially not how to speak them when you need to hear them.

I get a lot of calls from women, but from a lot of men, as well.  Guess what the men ask about?  Women.  They want to know how to do things right and are you really serious when you tell them not to call again.  You know and I know that at the time you said it, you were deadly serious, but then….after a couple of sleepless nights…you miss our little pointy heads so you call and say, “I’m just going to move on.”  Move on to what?  There’ll only be another one of us out there down the road, so best to learn how to make things different WITH us and save yourself a lot of future problems with another one of us.

Take my wife.  One of the first things she ever told me was about Crazy Horse.  My wife’s a real nut when it comes to history.  She told me about how his strategy is taught today at West Point.  “Back Door, Left Flank” she’s told me a thousand times.  Took me a long time to realize that it’s how she deals with me.  She never comes directly AT me, but sort of sneaks up behind and catches me off guard and so she’s made me think of how dumb my actions might have been at a time when I could have learned to do it and got a whole different, positive result.  Trust me….I’ve learned.  She used to flippantly tell her friends, “Men are like puppies, you gotta teach them to pee on the paper.”  I guarantee you I lift the lid now AND put it back down afterwards.  Didn’t take me long to learn.

Life with us is like a toolbox.  You can ‘fix’ anything, if you just know which tool to use.  So maybe I should call this blog, “Steve’s Repair Kit.”  What I’d like to accomplish in this blog is suggest a few tools to help repair relationships and while you might not believe me right away, I think as we start our repair work, you’ll find that it’s easier than you thought.

What I’d like to do is to record my blog to a link you can click on and listen to so if you want to keep it for future reference, you’ll have it.  So watch for my updates on this blog to have links with a title on them.  You know how we men are, but I will read everyone’s comments and I will try hard to keep this updated.   Watch for the sound links.

Please note this works in only Internet Explorer.