Blended Pleasures
Have you ever had one of those mornings? You wake up and the first thing that pops into your head is, “Boy, I just don’t know if I need to get up.” It’s one of those moments when just a little edge of doubt creeps in. It’s not that you’re worried, it isn’t that you think anything is wrong. It’s that moment when you just aren’t sure it is really that important.
It’s like when you buy yourself a gallon of ice cream to enjoy on your couch while watching your favorite DVD again, and you dig the spoon into the stuff, stick it in your mouth, and yet you still feel bored. You thought it was going to be great, but in the end it was just the “same old same old.” Hard to believe, but you’ve grown a little bored with MacGyver after all.
What exactly is boredom? What causes it? How does it go away?
Sometimes you come to the conclusion that you’re bored because you’ve been doing the same stuff you’ve always been doing. You need a little excitement, that’s what you decide. So you jump in your car and drive to the local dance club. All your old friends are there, or maybe they aren’t. It doesn’t seem to matter. You’re still bored.
Maybe it’s that you need something to pick you up, change your state of mind, alter your view of the world. So you buy a few drinks. Now you’re getting a little tipsy. Moments arrive when you feel a hint of giddy, you even share a few giggles. But then the moment changes again and you’re sitting in your booth with a crowd trying to decide what to say. Nothing seems to interest you.
Honestly, this is a very dangerous place to be. You’re in the midst of a kind of crisis but you don’t even know it. You’re about to take everything worthwhile in your life and throw it away because something seems to be missing and you just can’t figure out what it is. These moments of apathy can put everything you value on the line. You want to make a decision, because you just feel as if you have to do something about this (whatever this is, even though you can’t figure that out), so you think to yourself that maybe these things you’ve been choosing to do aren’t really the right ones for you after all. “I think I’ll stop dating what’s-his-name, he doesn’t seem too excited about things anyway.”
When the Four of Cups arrives in a reading, this is not the time to make a decision one way or the other about things. The glass is half full and half empty. Actually, there’s nothing wrong with the way things are at all, it’s just that we may have forgotten that “things” don’t create us – we create them. And right now, there’s no need to create anything. In fact, this is a great opportunity to just lay back and watch, just out of curiosity maybe, to see where things go on their own.
The really sad thing is that you woke up feeling like you weren’t important anymore. Your presence doesn’t matter. One way or another, life is going to go on with or without you, and for a brief second you actually considered letting it go without you. Well, for the day anyway. Instead, though, because it is a very unsettling idea to feel as if you aren’t significant enough to even warrant getting out of bed, you chose to see how you could make a difference. The dog licks your foot in gratitude as you fill her bowl with kibbles, but that didn’t really cheer you up. You decide to make a decadent breakfast of blueberry smothered waffles like your mom made for you when you were a child. You try to smile as the whipped cream gurgles out of the nozzle onto your plate. Nothing. You have an itinerary of meetings and expectations today, which is really why you got up, but after it is all said and done you just aren’t sure if you actually accomplished anything. The promotion and raise you earned two weeks ago doesn’t seem all the exciting any more. The honeymoon is over.
The Moon in Cancer (the decanate assigned to this card) is a very cozy place. Unfortunately it is too cozy sometimes. It just might be that moment when you can say it’s just too much of a good thing.