Simplicity

I'm back to my Schedule..and have new Grandbaby!

Hello, All! sorry I have not been very available the past few weeks. Lots going on here, the most exciting being the birth of our third grandchild! She is absolutely beautiful and mom and baby are doing well!

Now that things are settling down here, I will be back to my normal schedule and looking forward to hearing from everyone as to how they are doing!

I hope you are having a great summer!
Blessings,
Carrie A

Please understand

If you call an Advisor and ask a question that you want a yes or no answer to, and you dont get a yes or no, but rather a caution or info you should be aware of, there is a reason. We all have free will. That means an advisor can tell you where things are headed if you continue on your current path, but cannot guarantee anything because you have the will and right to choose. I wont make something up to make you happy with what you heard from me.

What we want to believe is or will be true and what is open or closed to us can vary, so please do not call expecting to hear what you want to hear. We would not be doing you any favors as Advisors that way. If you ask a question, you should be open-minded as to what information you will receive. This will make things easier for you and the Advisor. Asking the question 10 different ways will not change the answer you receive. Leaving negative feedback because you did not hear what you wanted is not a fair response, especially if you willingly renewed your minutes four times to continue the reading. If you perceive you are not getting beneficial information, just end the call. But please consider carefully whether or not you are being open-minded to what info is there for you.

Please allow us to provide the information we are able to give - you may end up with more info than you thought you would - and it might save you a lot of hassle and guesswork down the road.

It Could Never Be Enough

There is nothing like losing someone you love to make you wonder if you did enough; hugged them enough, said I love you enough, helped them enough, spent enough time or encouraged them enough.

Losing someone you love brings out the "if only I had" in all of us. The truth is that I really try to live my life in a way that minimizes the "if only" part of things, and yet it is never enough to satisfy the heart or the mind when you lose someone. When you lose someone you always want the opportunity to show them how much you love and care for them, even more than before.

So if you have someone you love in your life, make sure you take the time to tell them how much you love them, to encourage and uplift their spirit, and hug them often. Because no matter how much you do, when they are gone you will realize that it could never be enough.

Run Your Car on Water...Very Cool

Everyone is reeling over the price of gas these days, unless they just have money to blow. And even then, it seems ridiculous that the price continues to rise. The days of $2 a gallon gasoline are probably done forever. I think it will be a shock, although a pleasant one, if it even drops back down to $3 a gallon.

But take heart! There is a fast-growing trend you may want to research....running your car partially or wholly on water! According to everything I've seen, the seemingly simple modification to your car claims to increase your mileage by anywhere from 40-60%. And if you really want to get ambitious, you can convert your car to run on water only and really save a bundle. The cost of the modification depends on whether or not you do the modification/conversion yourself.

My husband and I are looking into this ourself and hope to be able to make the modifcation to at least one of our vehicles. To be sure it's done right, we'll probably pay to have this done. I'll let you know how it turns out! If you would like to know more about it, google "water for fuel" and do some research!

Happy Gas Savings!

Think Before You Judge

It's easy to place labels or stereotypes on people, and it's even easier to judge them based on things you may or may not understand. But until you walk a mile in someone else's shoes, you really need to stop and think before you judge. And even if you think you have walked in their shoes, remembering that each experience is different for each person can go a long way.

We are all human beings, struggling with our own demons, baggage, emotional and spiritual growth, and we are ALL learning as we go. Unless you are one of those people who got a manual for life when you were born, you are probably dealing with the same stuff as everyone else.

It's easy to judge people. It's much harder to try to understand them and accept them, good and bad, for who they are and what their lessons are in life. If the people of the world were more focused on the good we can be and do for each other, the world would be a much better place.

Summer Special

Hello All!
For the remainder of May, and throughout the Summer, I will be offering the Special Rate of $2.99 per minute.
Blessings to All,
Carrie A

Anger Danger

Have you ever noticed that it is easy to "feel" when someone angry walks into a room? Have you experienced dealing with a person who seems to get angry over the tiniest thing and, while you remain calm, they get more enraged? Then they push your buttons and get you angry, which always seems to calm them down and then they walk away and you are left with the anger they came in with.

This is a typical energy exchange and, whether or not the person recognizes their pattern of dumping their anger, it happens. Anger is a dangerous thing because it scatters and drains positive energy and leaves us energetically open to even more negativity.

When the energy exchange happens, it is not uncommon for the anger to be more intense once it is transferred to the other person. The origniator of the anger seems to become calm because they are now feeding off of the anger your are exuding.

If you find yourself suceptible to this type of exchange, there are a couple of things you can do to protect yourself:

The best thing you can do is remove yourself from the situation or person who is angry. Let them deal with their own anger instead of responding to it or taking it on. If removing yourself is not possible, do your best to remain in observation mode where you can be detached from the situation. Living with or dealing with someone who is constantly angry, can be draining so be sure you mind a method of clearing and protecting your energy that works for you.

Do your best to ignore any attempt to 'push your buttons'. Letting them be angry if they choose to be, with no agenda or need to resolve why the person is angry will likely send them off in pursuit of someone else who will be more responsive because, by responding to their anger in this way, you are essentially withholding your good energy which can sometimes increase their anger.

NOTE: This is important to know if you are dealing with this type of anger in an abusive situation. If so, please do NOT follow this advice as increasing their anger is likely to increase their level of violence. If you are in an abusive relationship, please contact the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at:
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TTY)

What 'Program' Are You Running?

Subconscious messages that run in the back of our mind (our subconscious mind) are often referred to as "programming". The program we are running is the basis for our belief systems about many things, mostly self. Herein lies the root of our perceived worthiness, what we believe we can and cannot accomplish or have in life, and our beliefs regarding whether or not we can and want to be healthy, happy, whole individuals on every level.

I knew a woman who would not allow herself to experience self love, to be healthy and whole, and least of all, happy.She always said she wanted these things, but something in her would not allow it. It was her programming. At some point in her childhood, this programming was put into place and it tormented her most of her 56 years. This person was my mother, so I understand first hand what programming can do whether voluntary or not. I am blessed to be able to say that she had made much progress the two years before she passed and had started to truly understand why it was so important.

If you find you are always struggling with health issues, anger, resentment and find yourself creating turmoil where there should be peace - and no matter what you do you cannot seem change it, you may have some deepseeded program running that is keeping you from the things you most want to experience in life.

Changing this programming, while difficult, is absolutely possible. It talks a lot of desire to change your belief systems, self-care and evaluation to make new decisions, and a lot of support from those who want to see you succeed. 95% of the time this programming is a result of decisions made by the child based on others around them and their responses and feedback. As adults, the decisions we made as children are often no longer of value or benefit for the new life and goals we have.

Facing the fear and anxiety of the child in you is not easy. But as an adult with increased awareness and understanding, you can comfort the child and allow the adult to redo the programming to allow growth into the happy, healthy, whole individual who can give ad receive love, and allow for peace and health.

Are you "Nice" or "Kind"?

Most of us heard the same instruction from our parents or an influential figure in our lives growing up, "Be Nice". Being raised to be polite and being nice are usually considered synonymous.

Being "nice", according to the definition I was raised with, means always giving away your personal power because speaking up meant being rude or ungrateful. Being nice, means letting people cross your personal boundaries so you don't have to offend them when you tell them you disagree or cannot meet their expectations or their timeframe. Out of being "nice" comes learning that it is rude to say "No" and to make people feel as though they can simply expect and get what they want. Being nice means taking responsibility for others and/or their actions because I am expected to.

"Kind" means always treating people with respect, including myself. Being kind also means that I can gracefully decline or say "No" when someone asks something of me that is too much or that I am not prepared to do. If I struggle with saying "No" in the moment, I ask for time to assess whether or not I am able to accommodate their request. I can always think through it and decline or accept later without the pressure. Being kind means I am able to stand firm on my boundaries without feeling guilty or taking responsibility for things that are not mine to take responsibility for. Being kind means I am able to speak truthfully and with tact and care for others but that I do not have to keep my mouth shut for fear of upsetting others. Kind means I do what I can and want to for others, without guilt deciding for me. It means I can do what I need to for myself, and know that I am responsible for myself first.

Sometimes the line between being nice and being kind can get a bit blurry. We all have obligations and responsibilities that create some level of stress at times. But if you are being nice, chances are it is a perceived obligation that is usually placed on you via guilt, coersion, or unreasonable expectations from others. Being kind means you take responsibility where it is yours, assist with responsibilities of others where you decide you should or want to (but not out of guilt or coersion) and that you have enough self-respect to know your own limitations.

I am not nice. But I am kind. I spent the majority of my first twenty-five years being nice before I realized the difference. I really enjoy being kind, and knowing that I don't have to give myself away or feel guilty when I need to stand firm on my boundaries.

You don't have to be "nice" to be a good person who is helpful and considerate of others. If you are struggling with being nice and you would like to learn to be kind instead, I would love to help you!

Blessings,
Carrie A

What about the "How" and "When"?

There are always plenty of things in life that we experience, pleasant and not so pleasant. Of all the things that seem to twist us inside out and make us analyze, think, pray, meditate, and ponder, is the question, "What am I supposed to be doing?" or "What is my purpose in life?" or "Am I ever going to be able to do what I love?"

We all want a level of reassurance and guidance as to what we are supposed to be doing for the most good, or how we are to go about it. Sometimes the 'what' is easy but the 'how' eludes us. So here are a few things that might be of help to you:

First of all, if you already know the 'what', look for ways to explore the 'how' before you lock yourself into anything. There are always options and sometimes how we end up using our gifts and talents turns out to be completely different than anything we were aware of when we began asking 'how'.

Second, if you are wondering how the 'what' will provide for you financially, keep in mind that when we do what we love and are in alignment with, the financial portion is always taken care of. I am not suggesting that everything will be "BAM!" and you are taken care of. But if you allow yourself to grow into your gift or talent, as you move more and more into alignment with your purpose, the financial part will grow as well.

Third, the "When". If you are struggling through a j-o-b while trying to figure everything out, don't allow yourself to get frustrated or feel as though you are delayed in getting where you want to be. Sometimes a j-o-b is the means to allow you time to grow and develop your gift/talent, to make that growth possible while you are supported. Sometimes, just having that safety net can keep the stress off enough to allow you time to cultivate your gifts and talents.

Remember, we all grow at different speeds, different stages, and for different reasons. What is good for someone else may not be what works for you. By the same token, while quitting a job to pursue a passion may not work for someone else, it may just be the step you need. Please don't judge your progress and growth based on someone else. Only you know what is good for you and what you can handle. But if you are like the majority, and have to spend some time growing into where you want/need to be, take heart. For everything you experience and learn along the way is for a reason and will likely prepare you for where you are headed, and be of benefit to others along the way or when you arrive at the place to utilize your gifts and talents fully.

Life is an experience that is meant to be embraced. Embracing the challenges can be difficult, but if you can look beyond the surface of the challenge and see a deeper meaning and/or an opportunity for growth, you are ahead of the curve already! The "What, How, and When" will always come together just when it should.

Bit the Bullet, Wanna Join Me?

Well, I finally did it. I bit the bullet and started my workout routine yesterday. I haven't worked out in so long I forgot how much work it really is. I know my body will thank me for it, but right now I can't figure out how I had so many muscles I didn't remember having! LOL!

The message came this weekend when I went to put on a favorite pair of stretchy denim jeans. They're not super tight (at least they weren't) but they move with your body so they are sooooo comfortable. I almost started crying when I slid my legs in and pulled them up. they stopped at the base of my thighs and refused to go any further! Ugh!

I know I have been putting it off, but when I almost died from double septic pneumonia 14 months ago, my internal organs really took a beating - not to mention losing every bit of muscle tone I ever had. I have been focusing on allowing my body to heal from the inside out as well as dealing with the passing of my mother. Well, the inside is back to 150% and now it's time for the outside to follow! I know Mom would want it that way too!

As painful as I know this is going to be, IT FEELS GREAT! Moving, breathing deeper, feeling my body getting stronger. I worked out twice yesterday, aerobics and then some light weights. I am high energy anyway, but this morning I have already done both aerobics and weights and I feel even more energized! It's very theraputic as well. I cried through both workouts, which tells me I am releasing grief over my mother and fear over losing strength in my body. Ahhhhhhh. It really does feel good!

So if anyone out there is looking to get their workout routine going again, please feel free to post your info here to help hold each other accountable, but mostly for encouragement. I am going all the way, and I would love for you to come along - we can do it together!

A Woman’s Guide to Catching and Keeping the Man of Your Dreams

1.       Laugh a Lot. Every man loves a woman who thinks he’s funny. When he is trying to pick you up or ask you on a date, laugh at everything he says whether it’s funny or not. If you really want him to want you, laugh extremely loud and add a snort or cackle sound in your laugh. He’ll find it very attractive and be impressed that you managed to have everyone staring, pointing and laughing.

2.       Solicit Compliments. No man can resist a woman who is down on herself. Pointing out every little thing you dislike about your body is especially attractive and he will enjoy racking his brain to reply to everything you say with a forced compliment. If you really want him to compliment you, add something new to the laundry list of badly needed self improvement items each time you rattle it off. Make things fun by forgetting to shave your legs and then ask him if it looks bad that you have one inch of hair growth on them. He won’t mind – he always thought sasquatch-style-women were sexy. And If anyone asks, you’re from France.

3.       Encourage Him to Wear Pink. Your guy is sure to get noticed at work when he wears a pink t-shirt under that white dress shirt he is required to wear for his all important meeting. You can help him get noticed by putting your favorite red panties in the wash with his white clothes. He’ll be wearing pink for months. If you really want to get him noticed, make sure he has plenty of pink socks and underwear to wear to his workout with the guys. If his socks don’t get anyone’s attention, the pink underwear won’t go unnoticed in the locker room. He’s guaranteed to be the center of conversation and he’ll be speechless.

4.       Teach Yourself to Cook. Nothing says I love you like a home-cooked meal. This is especially true if you’ve never cooked a meal in your life and you’re looking for a guinea pig. He won’t mind if you’ve burned it to a crisp or seasoned it to taste like plastic – he’ll be happy to choke it down while telling you what a fabulous cook you are. If you really want to show off your culinary skills, have him invite all his friends over for one of your home-cooked meals and get upset if he declines. After all, it’s the effort that counts, right?

5.       Be Forthcoming. Every man loves the fact that women tend to talk about items of a personal nature amongst themselves. So be sure you announce every bedroom blunder or sexual deficiency to your girlfriends. And while you’re at it, giving him the feedback and suggestions your girlfriends offered will really put him at ease and make him less self-conscious. The more feedback the better. If you really want to get his sexual juices flowing, ask his guy friends for their opinion too.

6.       Keep Him Waiting. It doesn’t matter if you knew about plans for the evening as much as two weeks in advance, don’t bother looking for something to wear any earlier than two hours before the event. Add a little spice to your relationship by tell him you’re ready to go and then asking him to wait ten different times while you head back to the bedroom for a wardrobe, hair or makeup adjustment. Be sure you are wearing something different each time you return from the bedroom. Just to make sure you don’t get in too much of a rush, wait until the last second to find the jewelry you intend to wear for that evening. After that, you can search for your purse and your keys. He won’t mind, really. Being three hours late can be fashionable if you handle it right.

7.       Ask His Opinion. Whether you are dating or have been together a while, be sure you ask your man if he likes what you’re wearing or how you did your hair, and make him swear to tell you the truth. He’s always eager to answer these types of questions, especially when he knows you won’t agree with him regardless of the answer. Be sure you give him that ‘I-can’t-believe-you-had-the-balls-to-say-that’ look when he offers his opinion. Men love that you want their opinion and he will be falling over his self to give it to you, even if it means sleeping on the couch for a week.

8.       Keep Him Guessing. There is no better way to keep your man on his toes than to be indecisive. Be sure you go shopping often and buy lots of things you don’t like and don’t intend to wear. This is great if you need something to do on weekends. He won’t mind following you around the mall while you return half of what you bought last weekend and he might even carry your bags for you. If you’re really looking for brownie points, as soon as you return everything, buy some more clothes (similar to the ones you just returned) before you call it a day. You can always return those items next weekend. You can always turn it up a notch by suggesting you stop for a bite to eat afterwards. When he asks you where you want to eat say, “I don’t care” and then when he suggests a place to eat say, “Anywhere but there.” He won’t be able to resist you.

A Man’s Guide to Catching and Keeping the Woman of Your Dreams

1.       Use cheesy Pick-up lines. Saying things like, “Hey, Mama, Wanna Hurt Me?” or “I couldn’t help but notice you wanting me from across the room” are extremely effective. Genuine conversation need not be part of your self-sales-pitch. Woman like men who ooze ‘Gigolo’ and ‘STD’. You will hardly have your mouth open to speak the words and she will be jumping your bones in an instant.

2.       Forget grooming. There is nothing sexier than a guy with hair growing out of his nose and ears, since every woman loves a little hairy tickle now and then. And of you really want to make an impression, throw out those nail clippers, let your fingernails get nasty dirty and offer to feed your woman something with your hands. Sexy!

3.       Flaunt Your Muscle. Men, and woman, can get a bit of a spare tire around the mid section at times – we’re all human. But use that spare tire to your advantage by referring to it as your “table muscle” and be sure you wear a t-shirt that lets it all hang out so your woman can admire how much muscle you really have. Belly shirts are in! And if you really have some serious muscle on your arms and legs, go around asking everyone to touch it or squeeze it so your woman will see how much other people admire your muscle. Women love it when other women put their hands on their man, especially when he likes it.

4.       Be Cheap. Everyone is on a budget these days and understandably so. But there is nothing more attractive than a man who complains about spending twenty dollars on a pair of blue jeans or two dollars for a soda (can you still get those that cheap????). When you take your woman to the movies or dinner, make a huge deal about what everything costs. After all, you picked the restaurant just so you could make her feel guilty about how expensive it is to take her places, right? Top it off by making comments about how much she eats – that will always win you brownie points.

5.       Be Disgusting. Women cannot resist a man who picks his nose when he thinks no one is looking. Grab that booger quick and flick it somewhere. She’ll think you’re great and admire your level of stealth and personal hygiene. And of course there is the sucking your snot down your throat at the dinner table or talking about your bathroom habits that makes women really, really want you.

6.       Try to Improve Your Woman. We all need a little self-improvement now and then. And nothing makes a woman feel better than when her man wants to point out things he likes about other woman that he sees, and uses it as a comparison for how his woman could improve.  Saying things like “your hair would look good like that” or “that dress would look good on you” would be fine, but why stop there. Go ahead and say things like, “What I could do with you if you had that body” or “we need to get you [some surgical procedure]” are music to a woman’s ears. After all, she could only hope to measure up to your level and definition of perfection.

7.       Be Cool Around Your Friends. Women love nothing more than having a man grope them and treat them like a bar maid in front of their friends. After all, your woman is your personal property and the guys will think you’re awesome. Never mind that it will make your woman feel cheap or like you view her as a piece of meat. Go ahead and slap or pinch her butt as she walks by. If you really want the guys to whoop and holler about your coolness, pinch or grab her boob instead. She’ll get a real thrill and so will you when she slaps your head off your shoulders. It’ll be really funny to the guys, too!

8.       Show Off Your Skills. Any man who is trying to impress a woman, whether they are ‘official’ or not, can always make his woman think more highly of him if he goes around hanging on other women like he’s super smooth and available. Better yet, encourage other woman to hang all over you while you’re with your woman. She’ll see how much of a player you are, and she will want you even more. And if you really want to take it up a notch, take her to the bar where you go to flirt and pick up previous women you’ve dated and invite all the girls you’ve slept with to have a seat and chat with you and your woman. This is super-classy and she’s sure to be turned on by how you flaunt that you can’t keep your zipper closed. She’ll thank you for it later – Really. Just be sure to hide the hedge clippers and any other sharp objects when you get home.

7 Ways to Ruin a Great Relationship - With a Bit of Sarcasm

1.       Act Jealous – A little jealousy can be a good thing when it makes you realize what you have in your partner. But a little tinge of jealousy by itself is a trivial thing in most instances. So if you really want to turn it up a notch, make snide hateful comments to your partner about whatever has this little green monster creeping up on you.  And, by all means, don’t talk honestly with your partner about how you feel. It is so much more effective to just do things you think will make them as jealous in return.

2.       Be a “Yes Man” or a “Yes Woman” – Being in a relationship does require some compromise. But it would be much easier if you give up your individuality (the person your partner fell in love with) and just say “YES” to whatever your partner wants. This is really effective when it comes to making you feel as though you don’t have a mind of your own. After all, once we are in a relationship, we don’t need to think for ourselves if we have someone who can do it for us. We don’t really want or need to grow as an individual, no matter how much stronger it can make our relationships. Just say yes.

3.       Pick a Lot of Fights. The opposite of saying yes all the time, it can be extremely effective in creating turmoil. Every relationship needs a good argument, right? And besides, if you’re not the “yes” type, it’s perfect for creating chaos, keeping out cooperation, and making your partner want to spend their time someplace else. Peace and harmony can be quite boring and improve communication, but that’s for amateurs.

4.       Complain About Everything. There is nothing more attractive than constant whining and complaining from the person you love. Why just share your worries and concerns and discuss possible solutions? Make a big deal about EVERYTHING and make sure you repeat your worries and troubles to everyone you talk to. There’s nothing better than dragging people down in the mud with you. After all, if you are going to allow yourself to be miserable, why should you go through it alone?

5.       Be Inconsiderate. Being considerate of your partner is way over rated. Anyone would be glad to be with someone who thinks only of themselves, and does whatever they choose regardless of how it impacts the person they’re with. You are an individual after all, and you should be able to do whatever you want. If you really want to dial this one up, act like you just don’t care about how inconsiderate you are.

6.       Have Double Standards. This is a good one. Most people think that a relationship is a give and take, and that it would be unfair to expect someone to do differently than they expect from their partner. But throw that rule to the wind. Place high expectations on your partner and expect them to meet your criteria. Don’t worry that you can’t meet your own criteria, since you’re not the one who has to measure up. This is extremely powerful when you want to make someone think you see yourself as better than them or that you are above common courtesies.

7.       Lie, Lie, Lie. There are few other things that can breed so much distrust and hurt in a relationship. This is a great tool for tearing away your partner’s confidence in you. It also works well if you want to keep them guessing about what they can believe or not. And no sense in lying about just the big stuff, or just the little stuff. Go ahead and lie about everything no matter what. If you’re going to lie, they will figure you are lying about everything else anyway.  And never mind that lying can make someone feel betrayed. If you really want this one to be powerfully hurtful, act like the world has come to an end if your partner returns the favor. You’re the only one who should be allowed to lie to people no matter how much you lie to others.

If you follow these simple 7 steps, you are sure to find yourself alone in no time, guaranteed! Good Luck!

Challenges showing up on your doorstep?

Everyday life can take its toll - especially when it seems like there is one concern after another constantly showing up at your doorstep. There are times when things seem to pile up so much that you may find yourself asking, "What else am I going to have to deal with?"

Being faced with challenges, as we all are from time to time, can actually be a blessing in disguise by allowing us insight into our own self and how we are approaching life. Here are a few things to ask yourself when is seems those challenges are piling up:

1. Is there a repeating theme or consistent underlying source in the challenges I am facing?

If so, your challenges may be an indication of something you are avoiding facing or dealing with in your life. If this is the case, ask yourself what and why and then decide how you want to address the situation. If you can bring yourself to face whatever you are avoiding, you'll find your challenges will begin to dwindle.

2. Are the challenges a result of poor communication or failure to communicate at all?

Poor communication, or lack of communication, can create challenges and misunderstandings where we least expect it. Being aware of communication breakdowns or differences in communication styles can go a long way to improving communication deficiencies and get the flow of information moving more smoothly.

3. Are the challenges a result of failure to accept the choices of others?

Sometimes what we think is best for someone is completely different from what they want or see for their life. Working to accept the choices of others around us, even when we disagree or believe they should do differently, allows everyone to be accountable for their own life and the choices they make. This can be extremely difficult in areas you may feel passionate about. Giving up the need to see people succeed according to your own definitions and desires for them allows you to more clearly focus on your path and the decisions you are faced with in your own life.

4. Are the challenges a result of a shift or change in the direction of your life?

We as human beings, as much as we like our habits, do change and evolve as individuals and as part of groups. Sometimes, in order to move forward in our life, change is necessary and unavoidable. Coping with those changes, even when the change is for a desirable result, can present challenges. Focusing on the ultimate goal of where your life is going can make large concerns seem small in the grand scheme of things. If you, however, find that the changes are not desirable, don’t get discouraged. Even the narrowest of paths require some navigational adjustment to stay on course. Reassess the situation and make decisions that help you get back on track for your goals as necessary.

5. Are the challenges a result of failure to accept the truth?

This is a difficult one to identify, and an even harder one to face. Wishing things were different doesn't make it so. Getting from one place to the destination you desire is impossible to do effectively, if you are not truthful about where you're staring from. Every person has things in their life that they want or need to change. Avoiding the truth of the situation only sets one up for failure. As hard as it can be, being honest about one's situation, realtionship, job, etc. is the beginning to developing a path to taking control of your life and where you want to go. Beating yourself up over everything you want to be different in your life won't help you reach your goals. Positive self talk and a clear plan for reaching your goals are a good place to start in creating a recipe for success.