I found this article on CNN.com by Oprah.com Life Coach Martha Beck!
Click here to read it on CNN.com!Ms. Beck contrasts real and effective commitment statements with what most of our common misconceptions about relationships. I think a healthy look at her commentary is a great first step to asking ourselves whether we're just pining over something in someone else that can be easily found within ourselves.
"Well, I - I think that it - it wasn't enough to just want to see Uncle
Henry and Auntie Em - and it's that - if I ever go looking for my
heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own back yard.
Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with! Is
that right?" Dorothy, The Wizard of Oz, 1939
Blessings from Salem,
Christian Day
So I'm completely smitten with Dolly Parton's newest song, Better Get to Livin'. I think it's just plain inspirational like everything about this amazing woman. The Dolly Lama's advice rings true for me and speaks to what I always hope for my callers (and for myself!) ... that even while we're waiting for Mr. Right to come around or things to improve, that life is still there for us to enjoy. Let's not put it on hold for anyone! Better get to livin'!
Blessings,
Christian
p.s. here's a
link to the video!
As my regular clients know, I've been away for the month of October,
preparing the over twenty events that I host or coordinate here in the
Witch City of Salem, Massachusetts. Another year is over, another
"season of the Witch," another time of the last harvest when we take
stock of what we have to get us through the winter. It was a very
prosperous year, but melancholy as well. At this year's Dumb Supper, a
dinner observed in total silence in respect for the departed dead, we
honored the passing of Shawn Poirier, also a reader on Keen. Leanne
Marrama, also a Keen reader, hosted Shawn's annual seance for the first
year and was fantastic. Her gift of spirit mediumship is something to experience.
Now that it's over, I'm logging on much more often, but am also
preparing to open my first shop ... with Leanne. We're very excited
about it because we feel it gives us a nice little base of operations
year-round to share our magic and psychic work with people all over the world. Both she and and I plan to continue to help clients here on
Keen after we're open. In fact, I'm going to make sure we have more than
enough phone lines to do just that!
Blessings from Salem,
Christian Day
On Sunday, I was to be found at Eastern Massachusetts Pagan Pride Day teaching a class on Necromancy, one of the most forbidden of all magical arts. The thirty Pagans who attended were probably expecting something pretty dark and creepy for even many Pagans and Witches are a little creeped out by the idea of summoning the spirits of the dead to ask for favors and information on the future. However, Necromancy has been the birthright of the Witch since Witches first walked the Earth. We have always worked with the spirits of the ancients and of our own loved ones who had moved on to spirit. The word Necromancy comes from the Greek words for Death and Divination, so even the mediumship performed by John Edward, Sylvia Brown, and many here on Keen is really just a modern form of ancient necromancy. Once the class was finished, many people expressed how they had found a new respect for the spirits and the work it takes to commune with them.
Over the centuries, Necromancy was transformed into something sinister and dangerous where we were only to speak with our beloved dead within a protective circle, with the spirit standing in a triangle outside the circle. I don't know about any of you, but if I conjured up my grandmother and told her to stand in some circle in the corner, I'd probably get quite the spiritual spanking. The ancients knew that our loved ones are on the other side and will help us when we need them ... to answer questions ... to help us achieve our goals ... to give us peace of mind and closure.
I talked about the importance of an ancestral altar. One student came up to me after the class and asked me why she was having such a hard time communicating with a particular spirit that had been visiting her home. She was an accomplished medium and accustomed to speaking with the dead, but this particular spirit just didn't want to make conversation. I asked her if she had left the spirit offerings or had an ancestral altar in her home. She said no. For any of you who are trying to establish a psychic connection with your loved ones who have passed on, an ancestral altar is one of the most powerful ways to do so. My own is filled with symbols of the dead from around the world, powders, candles, dried flowers, and even a human skull, used as one of the most ancient, sacred, and powerful methods of connecting to the world of spirit. Yours doesn't have to be so complex. It can be as simple as an end table with some pictures of your loved ones, a vase of flowers, and a candle or two. Every so often, you might leave a small plate of your mother's favorite food, your grandma's favorite tobacco, your best friend's favorite rum, or the occasional lottery ticket your uncle loved to play. Doing these things shows respect for our dead and if you respect the dead, they will respect you and will be more likely to aid you in your pursuits.
I created a new spirit summoning incense blend especially for my class drawing from a number of spiritual traditions. I'm sharing the recipe here for those of you who wish to connect with someone you love that has passed on. You do not need to be a Witch to use this incense. The energies contained within the ingredients are magical by nature and will aid in your work.
Spirit Summoning Incense
This loose incense is used on charcoal to summon and conjure the spirits of the dead to aid you in your goals and to give you visions of the future. Each of the ingredients has been used in various spirit incenses in various cultures and traditions. I combined what I felt were the best components of them all.
* 12 parts finely ground or powdered myrrh
* 8 parts ground or powdered red sandalwood
* 8 parts Mayan black copal
* 3 parts wormwood
* 2 parts dittany of crete
* 2 parts lavender
* 2 parts anise
* 1 part graveyard dirt (from the grave of someone you loved)
* 1 part vervain
Blessings from Salem,
Christian Day
I want an iPhone!!!!!
Three of my friends so far have gotten one. I'm skittish about getting technology when it first comes out but I simply must have this new toy. It's going on my "Witch list" tonight for the full moon! I had gotten the RAZR phone with iTunes but it was just as expensive as an iPhone and it was boring by comparison.
Ok, so this isn't one of those groovy psychic-o-licious posts but I simply couldn't resist talking about this! For those of you who have something you'd like to manifest, write it down on a piece of parchment or fine paper tonight before the full moon, and burn it in a cast iron pot outside under the light of the moon so that it's energies go out into the universe to bring you your wish!
Ok, I'm curious and wondering if someone reading my blog might be able to
answer this. Is there any place on Earth where the term "almost a year"
means less than three months?
I got a first-time caller towards the end of April who was not
satisfied with predictions I made and berated me in my feedback, claiming that she's
been speaking to me for "almost a year" without any predictions coming
true.
Most of those who call me know that I do not speak in absolutes and that
so much of what I predict comes down to what kind of work you're
willing to put in. Many of my callers have heard me say that "If I saw
you in a car crash tomorrow, you wouldn't drive and I'd be wrong."
Interesting paradox, eh? Of course, I've had some psychics tell me that you would only be putting the car crash off, but I disagree wholeheartedly with that theory. I believe we have power over our own futures.
I am NOT the psychic for those callers who are seeking absolute, immutable fate because I simply don't believe it exists. The idea of "free will" is not just some philosophical cop-out. It's the way time works. Of course predictions don't always happen exactly. They are based on choices we make. As a psychic, it's my job to help callers make choices that give them the results they want or, if their wants are simply unrealistic to the extreme, to give them results that help them grow and succeed.
I don't think I'd want to live in a world where every single thing was planned out for me from the beginning of time. It saddens me that this seems to be the way so many people think. What an empty existence to think that we're not co-creating what's happening to us. How sad to think that all of history can be played before us like it's already been recorded on tape.
There are always going to be those disappointed with me. I'm not Jesus Christ and if every single thing I said was cast into the stone of "fate," I wouldn't be here on Keen. I'd be sipping pina coladas on a catamaran in the Caribbean with all the millions I made predicting my lottery winnings.
Sometimes I might be off on a thing or two, but bear in mind that this is within a context where an hour's worth of a psychic reading is expected to be delivered in two minutes. Disappointment can also come when one refuses to do the work necessary to make life happen in the way one wants. But I simply don't see how a person I've spoken to three times, for a total of twenty minutes, over the space of two and a half months can portray herself as someone who has spoken to me "for months" and "for almost a year" in order to give definitively false impression that I've somehow been leading her on for copious amounts of time. By being dishonest, it has to make me wonder whether she actually did any of the work I set out for her to do. In a culture where blame and hate overshadow responsibility, it's no wonder so many people aren't reaching their goals.
I think the most dramatic example I can remember of these kinds of false expectations of psychics is the woman who called me ranting and raving that she wanted to find love but that she refuses to change her habit of never leaving the house except for work. She refused to go to dating sites, refused to join a dating service, and wouldn't even so much as go to a coffee shop. She screamed and demanded to know when love was going to find her and it was my job to tell her that it was GOING to happen, even if I didn't feel it would, so that she could feel better about her life. In my absolute frustration, I finally just let go and said "So you want me to lie to you? Well the pizza delivery guy is not going to fall in love with you! If you want love, you need to reach out and get it!" In the words of Keen's Peekaboo Psychic, Oy Vey!
Unfortunately, scientific concepts of time and the nature of reality are hard to integrate into a three minute phone call that also must include whether the archetypal HE is coming back or planning to call. So, time and time again (pun intended), I must hope that false expectations or understanding of what a psychic truly does within the streams of time will not complicate the process and make people angry. Perhaps now that I have a blog, I can get these ideas across more clearly.
My clients who actually have been with me for almost (and over) a year know that they are not passive participants in readings with me. They know that they must be ready to work towards what they want or they simply won't get results.
Blessings,
Christian Day
People who call me know that I am blunt. I say what I'm really feeling
and sensing about a caller's situation and rarely do I candy coat
things. While I do have a great deal of compassion for my callers and
try to guide them on the best path, I also sometimes need to give a
little verbal nudge to help them move on and move forward.
But, sometimes I get those calls where I feel like the expectations are
so high to give the fairy tale, paint a fantasy, tell them what they
want to hear. I've resisted this temptation for the twenty years I've been reading professionally. Here on Keen, that temptation to "sell a bill of goods" is even greater with the feedback system. But the integrity of what I do is more important. I could have a thousand one star feedbacks but, at the end of the day, if I gave the truth as much as it was made available to me, then I feel I did the right thing.
I often wonder how I would fare as one of these fantasy readers. How would I spin the story? What would I say? Christian the Fantasy Reader might sound something like this:
"Yes, he thinks about you all the time. I realize he's been married for five years with two children and hasn't called you since 1994 but you can rest assured that you're never far from his mind. In fact, you were in a former life together. I see you in ancient Egypt. You're spinning around on the top of the great pyramid on one heel and he's kneeling at the foot of the pyramid serenading you with bongo drums. Every time the pizza delivery guy knocks on your door, you think it's your soulmate because the rythm of the knock is somehow reminiscent of the sound of the bongo drums. 'Could it be him?', 'Has he come back?', 'Were all those psychics right? Is this my soulmate or is it just another pepperoni and cheese?'"
Yeah, folks. The temptation to go that route is high for most of us on Keen but, somehow, I think I'd make a lousy fantasy reader. I care too much about the value of truth.
The hardest thing about reading on Keen is rising above the symbiotic relationship between the fantasy readers and the fantasy callers. On one side, there are the psychics that always seem to see "him" coming back. This is not to imply that these folks are necessarily being misleading on purpose. Perhaps they just have rose colored glasses on or maybe they just love feeling like they are offering hope to people, even if it's false hope.
On the other hand, you have the callers that only want the fantasy. I've often seen this type post on message boards complaining that every psychic said "he would come back" when, at the end, "he" didn't. But that raises a red flag for me because, while sometimes I see the guy returning (though more often than not in a rickety jalopy rather than on a white horse), often I don't. Did these people never call me? Did they only call the fantasy readers?
I honestly think there are callers out there who cherry pick the readers whose feedback seems to always imply the archetypal "him" coming back. Perhaps such people just aren't ready for the truth. This is not to say that no man ever comes back. As my good friend, fellow Salem Witch, and Keen reader Leanne Marrama says, the criminal often returns to the scene of the crime ... but to what end? As they say in Pet Cemetery ... "sometimes, dead is better."
Truth is an elusive thing. You have to work for it. It doesn't always have the most sugary topping. It's not always something we're eager to see. But, in the end, it helps us to grow as people and so I think it's good sometimes to take off those rose colored glasses and see things for what they are. As the old saying goes ... The Truth Will Set You Free!
Blessings from Salem,
Christian Day
Dear Keeners,
This is my first blog post. I've been wondering how to translate my
thoughts into a blog setting that would speak to both the readers and
callers who are part of our great Keen community.
I'm going to use this, my first blog, to talk about a concern of mine: the idea that a psychic must be wrong if
he or she does not agree with what other psychics say.
In my opinion, no psychic is ever 100% accurate. Each of us sees but pieces of a larger puzzle. Personally, I never read in absolutes, nor do I believe in
fate or destiny other than one in which we take part in shaping. I believe that our lives are ours to control.
To state that one
psychic is wrong about the future while others are right does not take into
consideration that the future is still out there to be lived. It hasn't happened yet and we simply do not know for sure. To imply
that, because one reader's perspective is different than those of other readers, he or she must be guessing, is
simply unfair and makes an implication that that person is somehow intentionally
defrauding others.
The majority of the Witches working here in Salem have had many years
of training in psychic development, magic, and many other occult arts.
This is not just a career for us but a spiritual way of life. I take
what I do very seriously and I never guess. I say what I see, hear, and
know as the truth as revealed to me through altered states of
consciousness along with the various psychic tools that I employ in my
quest for answers.
I honestly prefer clients who are open to the journey of life, who do
not want fate to be planned out for them to the most minute degree, who want destiny to be something they create. Those who call me with preconceived expectations that they expect me to verify as if reading off of a Hollywood script will be sadly disappointed.
This is not to say that psychics are never wrong. Every psychic is wrong at some point simply because this is a right-brain, intuitive process that involves the same kinds of mental mechanics involved in dreams and artistic expression. To define such things as immutable and solid is to disrespect the very foundations of intuitive wisdom. I don't approach my art with the idea that I am going to be 100% accurate and infallible. I approach it with the idea that I am helping people to reach their best destiny through revealed truths and uncovered mysteries.
There have certainly been times when I've received stellar, five star feedback on a call where I might have missed something, gone down the wrong path for a sentence or two, or misunderstood what I was seeing or feeling. Strange as this may sound, I've often wondered why callers don't point those mistakes out. Even more disconcerting are the rare times when I've had calls during which a caller confirmed many things to be correct, only to leave me a scathing feedback for the one point they disagreed on. My only problem with the feedback system is that it seems to compel people to make us sound like either omnipotent gods or talentless hacks. There seems to be no middle ground and rarely do I see two, three, or four star ratings on any advisor . Certainly this cannot reflect what is really going on during the calls. Surely not every reading is either 100% or zero.
It has been the way of the Witch from time immemorial to find real wisdom and real truth, not to parrot back to people what they're hoping to hear. We as Witches would be remiss in our duties as guides of humanity if we ignored our role as wisdom seekers.
Blessings from Salem,
Christian