Just Making You Think and Keeping It Real

Why I blog the way I do and how I find it to be necessary to blog this way

I have learned so much from this work. It is opened up my world and taught me so much about people and how many have the perception of wanting an easy life which does not really exist. Everyone wants easy without the work. We are always needing to constantly work on ourselves and I admire every caller that I have now because they do their work.

As an adviser, I know that many callers want us to tell them that their life will be fine and they can just sit back and enjoy without doing the work on themselves. It does not help that us advisers are also caught up in predictions and accuracy. It is ego based to think that us an adviser can predict a person's life without holding the caller responsible for their actions. This mindset has caused more damage and misery that help. Giving a caller the illusion of great things without their needing to work on themselves is wrong and unethical.

I know that we see all of the breakthrough shows on TV but there is limitations because there is an aftermath. I learned from his job that people have to find happiness internally not through a relationship, a job or other desires. Even when I have predicted something good and it happened for the caller, it does not fill the person with joy. Happiness is an inside job always. Often people cant receive happiness because they fear losing it.

People need to forgive and get over their hurt, fear and anger. There is no way around this. Predictions wont fix your life. There is no quick fix.

When you choose to read my blogs, expect to have something trigger you and wake you up to changing yourself instead of blaming others for your choices. All of our feelings are a choice.

I wont be blogging a whole lot on this site because I blog elsewhere and it is time to focus on that business. Life is changing rapidly for myself. I like where things are going for me and I hope everyone feels the same about their life.

From Inspirational Speaker Les Brown

What he says is so right. I have only positive and successful people in my life who do not whine and will not blame.


Don't waste your time on foolishness or foolish people. Time is the stuff of what life is made of, and your life is extremely valuable to you...to your family...and to the world. Guard it at all costs. Life is full of attractive distracting foolishness which will waste your time, and deplete your much-needed energy.

Foolish people do not like to own responsibility for their decisions, and never see the impact of their actions and choices on their lives. They will try to recruit you into their madness, and will attempt to convince you to pay their bills, pay their way, and solve their problems. They don't listen to anyone, and are always right ~ even thought their life is in shambles.

Let others be satisfied with being spectators, complainers, and victims. You are a player on the field of life. You have dreams and goals that you are determined to achieve. You have drive and a desire to make your life matter. There are things that others find very enjoyable which just don't fit who you are. Be focused, relentless, and HUNGRY to make your life count. You have GREATNESS within you! Les Brown

Wisdom from Joel Osteen

Don’t expect people to be perfect. It’s not fair to them, and it will be a source of frustration for you.

If a person is hurt, they are choosing to be hurt because they have too many unrealistic expectations that is not fair. Be realistic and you will hurt less.

For all who would like the problem to just go away or

for the other woman to just go away.
The truth is that
" Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know " Pema Chodron

This may be unpleasant to hear but the situation is a teacher and the other woman is a teacher. Sometimes things have to get so big and so out of control in order to get a person's attention. The sooner the person learns, the quicker the problem ends. Fighting it prolongs it.

Jada Pinkett Smith gives excellent advice for women marrying a man who has children from another relationship

She has been married 17 years and happily married to Will Smith. Listen to her!

Jada Pinkett Smith is a woman of sacrifices and making things work!

When she decided to marry Will Smith 17 years ago, she knew off hand that she’d have to accept his child, Trey Smith, from his previous marriage and have a good functional relationship with Will’s ex-wife Sheree.

Most recently, in a Facebook post to her fans, Jada posted an open letter explaining how she knew that Will’s ex-wife and her son Trey were a part of the package deal and she doesn’t support any woman who tries to keep her man from his children of a previous marriage.  She wrote:

A Letter to a Friend:
Blended families are NEVER easy, but here’s why I don’t have a lot of sympathy for your situation because… we CHOOSE them. When I married Will, I knew Trey was part of the package…Period! If I didn’t want that…I needed to marry someone else. Then I learned if I am going to love Trey…I had to learn to love the most important person in the world to him…his mother. And the two of us may not have always LIKED each other… but we have learned to LOVE each other.

I can’t support any actions that keep a man from his children of a previous marriage. These are the situations that separate the women from the girls. Your behavior is that of an insecure child who needs to recognize her own weaknesses that MUST be strengthened to take on the task at hand. We can’t say we love our man and then come in between him and his children. THAT’S selfishness…NOT love. WOMAN UP… I’ve been there…I know. My blended family made me a giant… Taught me so much about love, commitment and it has been the biggest ego death to date. It’s time you let your blended family make you the giant you truly are.

A few weeks back, Jada also wrote about the career sacrifices she made as a woman to devote herself to being a great wife and mother. After returning home from a business trip to New York, her son Jaden left her a surprise gift with a note attached that said “Everyday is special with you.”  She wrote:

“I may never get an Oscar. I may never have the absolute career I dreamed of because of the sacrifices I have made for my family. But…these are the small moments that make it all worth it and validates every decision I have ever made.”

From Inspirational Speaker Les Brown

Check yourself. Just stop! Take a moment to think before you act so that you are in control of yourself, your emotions, and your responses. It is easy to justify unpleasant or rude behavior with excuses of being tired, overworked, or stressed. Sometimes, we take out the irritations of the moment or the day out on our family, children, co-workers, or even the family dog or cat. What is the emotional tone of your family or your life? Is it harsh, cold, unforgiving, withdrawn, or warm, loving, open, and embracing?

Take time each day to build and generate new verbal and non-verbal responses that will allow you to build your capacity to be a gentler, kinder, more compassionate, peaceful, and loving person. This is a skillset that takes intentional rehearsal and practice ~ just like playing sports or working out. If you find yourself acting often out of irritation, anger, or even rage, reflect on what excuse you make okay to allow someone else to be the brunt of your bad attitude or worse ~ your bad behavior. Decide that no excuse is worth the cost of emotional vomiting or venting in public or in private ~ especially on those you love. Do the hard work and the heart work to hold yourself to a higher standard. Raise the bar on yourself, your attitude, and your behavior!! You deserve!! ~ Les Brown

Believing stressful and negative thoughts

is a choice. Choose to believe the best. Otherwise a person is choosing to suffer. If you don't have facts, then don't make up the story.

Never expect anyone to love you more than

you love yourself. We can only attract as much love as we feel inside. If we are wounded, we will attract someone wounded.

Well Said. No one is suppose to complete us. Heal yourself

It's all about falling in love with yourself and sharing that love with someone who appreciates you, rather than looking for love to compensate for a self love deficit.

 Eartha Kitt quotes 

Amazing quotes by the amazing Byron Katie

Below are some of her best quotes. If a person wants to be happy try living by these quotes


When you believe that your problem is caused by someone or something else, you become your own victim.

Everyone in your life is a figment of your imagination--even you.

You can only see what you believe—nothing else is possible.

Any story that you tell about yourself is food for the ego. There is no authentic story.

Someone says that they love me, and I say "Thank you." Someone says that they hate me, and I say "Thank you." It's their story. What do I have to do with it?

Sadness is a tantrum. It’s a minor tantrum, but it is still the war with God, with “what is”—and really, with “what (apparently) was.”

Forgiveness is the discovery that what you thought happened, didn’t.

You’re just suffering from the belief that there’s something missing from your life.

Don’t pretend yourself beyond your evolution.

Like attracts like

Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

You can't expect to draw people into your life who are kind, confident, and generous if you're thinking and acting in cruel, weak, and selfish ways. You must be what it is that you're seeking- that is, you need to put forth what you want to attract.

Honesty may be hard but it is necessary

I was watching Dr. Drew last night. There was a segment about Lance Armstrong being accused of doping. Dr. Drew said that in his career as a therapist that he is often lied to. He went on to say that he does not think that Lance is guilty of doping. I found this segment interesting because not only do I think Lance is innocent, I was shocked to hear that Dr. Drew was lied to a lot by clients. I had believed over the years that I was lied to by clients because they dont respect psychic work and they are trying to test me so they lie on purpose. It was really therapeutic to hear that he has been lied to a lot because it reminded me that some people are scared to be honest.
It is important to be honest. It makes life easier, readings are accurate and a person will attract great people into their life. I know that lying is about self preservation. People lie for many reasons. One major reason is that they are ashamed and dont want to be judged. One lie needs to another lie and it attracts people who lie. If you struggle with honesty, first forgive yourself and stop judging yourself then decide that you are worth the truth. If you are not honest then do not expect others to be honest with you.

Time frames and personal responsibility

I know that people want time frames because they want to control their emotions and hope not to have to take responsibility for their actions and choices. I rarely give out time frames unless I know that the caller gets it that they have to participate in their life.
Most of the time a caller is hoping that even though they told the guy not to call them ever again or if they have sabotaged the situation that they will not have to fix the problem. It goes back to needing to be right and wanting to control the other party. All of the time frames in the world will not be accurate unless a caller decides to be honest, take action and be will to do what it takes to fix the situation that the are calling about.

Making the adviser responsible for fixing your life is wrong and will never change the situation. Times frames can not override poor choices. Remember you choose to call, no one can force you to call so make the most of it and really let your adviser help you.

Dedicated to every person who wishes that someone in their life would just go away. They are there for a reason

Pema Chodron

WHO’S ON YOUR LIST?

"Boss, coworker, spouse, roommate, mother, father, child—who are the people you really dislike and wish would simply go away? Be grateful to them: they’re your own special gurus, showing up right on time to keep you honest. It’s the troublemakers in your life who cause you to see that you’ve shut down, that you’ve armored yourself, that you’ve hidden your head in the sand. If you didn’t get angry at them, if you didn’t get fed up with them, you would never be able to cultivate patience. If you didn’t envy them, if you weren’t jealous of them, you would never think to stretch beyond your mean-spiritedness and try to rejoice in their good fortune. If you never met your match, you might think you were better than everybody else and arrogantly criticize their neurotic behavior rather than do something about your own."
(Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change)

I will add that the other woman is real powerful too. She shows up because the relationships has issues that are being avoided. Face them and stop wanting the fairy tale. No one can break up a happy home.

Change yourself and stop wanting others to change.

The need for love

The Work of Byron Katie

When you say or do anything to please, get, keep, influence, or control
 
anyone or anything, fear is the cause and pain is the result. Manipulation is

 separation, and separation is painful. Another person can love you totally

in that moment and you’d have no way of realizing it. If you act from fear,

there’s no way you can receive love, because you’re trapped in a thought

about what you have to do for love. Every stressful thought separates you

from people.