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Ask Kittenit, Law of Attraction Coach - Too Old for Love?

#  re: Are You Waiting for Mr. Right.... or Are You Afraid of Commitment? Part 2 of 2

Tuesday, April 03, 2007 5:30 PM
by Brandy

wounderful!!! its great advice for someone looking for love, but what if its allready passed them by? like that cute waitress or the hottie at the carwash? True there are more fish in the sea. anyways... awsome job! loved it even tho i allready have my mr. right!

Dear Brandy, Kittenit here:

Remember that the Law of Attraction responds to your thoughts (and beliefs). If you think you are too old and life has passed you by… then it has. The LOA is giving you what you focus on.

However, if you believe that Love does not discriminate because of age (because it doesn't). And new Love is always waiting around the next corner (which it always is), then you will see those results instead.

Age Affirmation:
For those concerned with age, here's an affirmation for you:
I am youthful, vibrant, attractive and healthy and ready for a great relationship!

That being said, I'm happy to hear you have someone special in your life.

Love & Light,

Kittenit

posted Tuesday, April 03, 2007 8:06 PM by kittenit | 2 Comments
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Ask Kittenit, Law of Attraction Coach - What If I have a few Prince Charmings?

Comments
# re: Are You Waiting for Mr. Right.... or Are You Afraid of Commitment? Part 2 of 2
Monday, April 02, 2007 9:32 PM by

nellababi
this is a great blog...my only problem is, i seemed to always have a few "prince charmings" to pick from...but i seem to like all of them. which one should i choose? and what about the ex? should i still like him? lol....oh my....

Dear nellababi:

And this is a problem, how? I don't know but I think I'd be pretty jazzed if I had those kinds of problems. Ok. So let's get back to the Law of Attraction. And let's start with the obvious. Gratitude. Be grateful that you have such good fortune to have all those choices in the first place (You are certainly in attraction-mode).

But not clear on which to choose from. So let's think about this.

Possibility #1: - Since you are not sure which of these fine gentlemen is "the one" – I want to warn you there is a very good chance it may be none of them. When you meet your Perfect Mate, no one else will come close. There is no one that will compare to the person the Universe will send you.

Possibility #2: You are creating this whole situation by an unconscious desire to remain uncommitted. This can come from uncertainty but not in uncertainty about your potential partners. Uncertainty about yourself. My money is on this horse.

Are you harbouring fears of failure? Are you worried in the back of your head about whether there will be issues with fidelity? What is bugging you about this, deep inside you - just below the surface?

You may have to really think about this. These are the questions you have to ask yourself. You need to get to the root of what is eating at you and sabotaging your desires.

Ok. So the Law of Attraction states that the experience we are having right now is the residual effect of something we had focused on an earlier time. Or as Esther Hicks would say. "What you are feeling right now is what is in the process of becoming".

The point is somehow you have taken yourself to this point and now you may need a little help to figure this out.

So ask for clarity.

Take some time to meditate and relax. Take a few moments to get in touch with the Higher Self inside of you, the God-ness that you are a part of…. And ask for clarity. Here are a few good affirmations in the form of an informal prayer to that Higher Part of Yourself:

Dear Universe (God, Higher Self, etc.),
This is one of those times when I could really use some clarity.
Please guide me to the person who is the Perfect Mate for me, whether I know him now or not.
Let me also be the right person for this relationship.
I call upon My Own Divine Source for strength, wisdom and clarity.

While you recite this mediation, really try to feel the Source inside and outside of you. Do this meditation in morning after you rise and evenings before you go to bed. In short time, evidence will start to present itself as to who you really want to be with and who is the right one for you at this time.

Love & light,

Kittenit
posted Tuesday, April 03, 2007 7:41 PM by kittenit | 0 Comments
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Ask Kittenit - Defining Unconditional Love

I would like to address a comment to my blog:
"Are You Waiting for Mr. Right.... or Are You Afraid of Commitment? Part 2 of 2"

Comment by Neeru
"Love is unconditional and does not needs commitments. It is felt not necessarily spoken. Commitments often makes a person feel trapped and fearful. love is to make a person happy and friendly, with setting limits it can make he or she uneasy and uncomfortable. Mr.Right comes with destiny, true desire and willingness of God."

Hi, Kittenit here - First of all, thanks for your post. As far as what love and commitment, I believe this depends on how you define both of those words.
  • Some people define love as commitment, that is, monogamy.
  • Other people define love as sex with as many people as possible. Some people say they "love" their wives or husbands, yet find no issue in sleeping with other people behind their backs (or with their knowledge).
  • Some people say they love their dog but have no problem dumping them off to the pound after they ate the remote control.
  • If a loved one were in an endless coma, some people would want to "pull the plug" out of their love for that person.
  • Another person might elect to keep them alive as long as their natural life will allow, regardless of the misery that person is in.
Which of these is love? Any and all of these. Why? Because that is how that particular person defines it in their lives. We choose to create our own reality.

I know that is hard to accept when you have been taught something quite to the contrary. But whatever a person believes is their reality. You may not agree with every other person's definition of love or commitment and you are certainly entitled to disagree. But you can't change other people's reality. Criticizing or judging others does not make one better. It just makes one critical and judgmental.

I do believe that the highest form of Love is unconditional and perfect. But soon after thinking that I find myself a bit of a hypocrite. How many of us are truly capable of loving unconditionally and perfectly? I'll say I'm working on it... but I'm certainly not there yet.

Unconditional means everyone should be entitled to receiving your love. Loving those you love is easy. Loving those that do not like you and may never like you is a whole lot harder. Loving those that wish you or your loved ones harm is very difficult.  Yet all of that is what unconditional love states. If you only reserve it for certain people, then it is very conditional.

Let me state, I am not a religious person, but I do recognize the great spiritual leaders that have been sent our way. For instance, Jesus was a great role model for forgiveness. He taught us to forgive people of the most atrocious actions, including harm and pain they inflict on ourselves and others.

Defining Commitment

As far as commitment, if you describe or define "commitment" using threatening words like "trap", "fearful" then that is how it will manifest for you. Why? Perhaps that has been your experience of it - and as a result, that is how you are choosing to define it.

If you define commitment using words like loyalty, love, devotion, caring, security, acceptance, and responsibility towards others - suddenly the energy around the word, "commitment" changes. It doesn't sound so threatening and scary. Instead, it sounds very safe and loving.

"Mr.Right comes with destiny, true desire and willingness of God."
God is always willing to give your hearts desire, always and forever. You don't need God's permission for that - you have always had it. You are not separate from God, waiting for a scrap or two of kindness from the Great One. You are a Child of the Divine Consciousness and are entitled to be happy, productive and prosperous.

The Laws of Nature desire that all species flourish and abound with prosperity and happiness.  When we do not flourish, when we are miserable and unhappy, this is a clear sign that we have lost touch with The Source of All.

So you see, it all comes about based on how you perceive it. No one is right and no one is wrong.

"You create your reality as you go along." – Winston Churchill

Love & Light,

Kittenit

posted Tuesday, April 03, 2007 2:38 PM by kittenit | 0 Comments
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7 Steps to Attracting the Perfect Mate or Soulmate - Using the Law of Attraction

As an advisor on Keen, one of the most popular questions I get is, "How do I find my soulmate? Let's see how using the Law of Attraction can help.

Step 1: Forgive the Past

This is a big one for many people. I talk to so many people who wonder why they are not manifesting a good relationship. Then it comes up in their reading that they are still obsessing about a past relationship that absorbs their attention, generating disappointment, anger, resentment and other negative emotions.

You cannot be emotionally available as long as you are still living in the past. Remember the Law of Attraction will give you more of what you are focusing on. So, as hard as it is, you must let the old, broken relationships go. Wish your ex-boyfriend, ex-husband, ex-booty-call, ex-lover, ex-(etc.) well and send him/her on their way to a better life. How do you do this?
  • Stop talking about this person
  • Stop getting psychic readings about this person
  • Stop allowing yourself to be angry at this person
  • Stop listening to others who want to talk about this person with you
  • Stop feeling victimized over how you were treated<>
  • <>Summary: Stop giving it your attention. Take your power back and stop letting this situation control you
Instead:
  • Wish that person well
  • Be thankful for the lesson they have brought you to deal with which will make you a better person - it will teach you the importance of forgiveness, if you let it.
  • See releasing this old situation taking you one step closer to attracting your Perfect Mate.
  • Summary: Ah! Isn't that soooooo much better? Phew! Let's move on...
"But I Can't Stop Thinking About it, I Can't do this, I Can't do that, I Can't - Etc."
If you find letting go of bad relationships is a problem, you are not yet ready for a new relationship. You are still dealing with your own issues of pain, rejection and anger. Focusing on these things will not allow you to bring their opposites. The Law of Attraction will not allow it. You cannot bring positive things and people in your life if you are focused only on the negative. You will only bring more of the negative.

Getting Closure
Then people talk about the need to "get closure". Getting closure is as simple as never thinking about that relationship again. Period. Block it out. Still thinking about it? Change the subject in your head. Period. Period. Period. There's your closure. You don't need anyone's permission or justification to move on. Just move on.

Step 2: Write down a list of the ideal qualities you wish for in a perfect mate

Be honest with yourself. List the ideal qualities, not what you feel you can "put up with". Keep this file private. If you type this up in a word processor like Word, you may be able to use a password protect to keep nosey people out of your business. Be creative here. The Universe likes specifics.

Use Contrast to help you find the right qualities.
Contrast is all crappy stuff you didn't like in the past relationships. Let me explain something here - you are not focusing on these or writing them down. Instead use the contrast from past relationships and switch them to their opposites and write that down. Here are some ideas:
  • Dated a cheapskate in the past? Use that as inspiration to ask for what you really want: "My Perfect Mate is generous, giving and prosperous."
  • Had a problem with a cheater? Try this one: "My Perfect Mate is loyal and loving to me. He values me and supports me in every way possible."
  • Tend to attract married and unavailable? How about, "My Perfect Mate is single, available and ready for a long-term relationship".

Step 3: Eliminate Self-sabotage

This is another big one. You may feel you are not be ready for a new relationship because of your own fears and concerns. Or you may be thinking you will not find a perfect relationship at all. In your case, try some "pre-affirmations". See if you recognize something here you can use:
  • "Please _____ (God, the Universe, Spirit, etc.) give me the strength, understanding, patience and all other qualities I need to be the Perfect Partner."
  • "I am a Child of (God, the Universe, Spirit, etc.) and manifesting Perfect Love is my Divine Birthright."
  • "I radiate harmony, love, trust and friendship to all I meet."
  • "I love my body. I am sexy, slim and attractive. I am a man-magnet."
  • "The Universe knows what I need in a Perfect Mate and is paving the way for the two of us to meet and recognize each other."

Step 4: Affirm and Visualize What You Want

Twice a day, morning and night, go over your list and recite it out loud. Feel the passion and desire as you read off the qualities you have accumulated. Feel free to add or edit the list if you think of other great qualities. Visualize yourself and your new partner at the beach having a great time. Visualize the two of you in ... uh... intimate moments.

Step 5: Allow the Universe to work its magic

The Universe needs a little time to do it's thing. You need to trust that it is on the job and working behind the scenes, regardless of how things appear on the outside. This means don't worry about how you will meet this person or what the circumstances are. That is none of your concern - it is irrelevant and just causes you to focusing something other than the manifestation itself.

The Universe will find the fastest, quickest and most direct way of bringing the two of you together. When you meet this person, there will be no doubt - for either of you.

Step 6: Express Your Gratitude

Be grateful for all the signs that the Universe is fulfilling your request for perfect love, whether it be someone at work inviting you to lunch or the pizza man flirting with you. You are drawing people to you, so take your time and wait for the right one.

Manifestations often show small signs of manifesting before they deliver the big one. Never doubt the process. Trust that it is happening and continue your affirmations. And be grateful at all signs of manifestation.

Step 7: Be Vigilant, Be Persistent

After you start seeing signs of your manifestation, after you meet this Perfect Person, be sure to keep up the affirmations. Change or update them, if you need to.
  • "All things between my Perfect Mate and myself are peaceful, compatible and harmonious"
  • "My Perfect Mate and I are the best of friends"
  • "My Perfect Mate and I express our love for each other freely and warmly"
  • "My Perfect Mate is supportive of me and helps me achieve my dreams"
The tendency is to stop once we get what we want. The problem with this is that eventually doubt and our old negative ways start to set in and we start to manifest problems in the relationship because we start distrusting our partner or the process that brought him/her to us. 

You can usually tell when you haven't been vigilant with your affirmations. Problems or blockages will show up in your relationship. The Universe only delivers problematic situations when you have started to focus on the negative or start worrying about what can happen. So don't wait to see the problems turn up. Keep up your affirmations. Create a strong bond between yourself and your partner by visualizing it first.

I've seen truly amazing things come from the power of thought.  Replace doubt with faith and persistence. Master this and you have tapped into your own Divine Power.

I hope this has been helpful to you. Be sure to check out my other love blogs!

Love & Light,

Kittenit
1-800-ASK-KEEN
ext. LOVE or 5683
posted Tuesday, April 03, 2007 1:05 PM by kittenit | 2 Comments

Are You Waiting for Mr. Right.... or Are You Afraid of Commitment? Part 2 of 2

In Part 1 - Are You Waiting for Mr. Right... or Are You Afraid of Commitment? Part 1 of 2, we discussed how fear of commitment can be holding you back in your search for a perfect relationship. In this post, we'll have a look at the idea of waiting for "Mr. Right" to show up at our door. Does this sound like you? Let's see if it does. I am always amazed at people who expect they will meet their perfect mate by sitting at home, watching reruns of Friends. Then there are those of us that figure that God will bring them the right person - so they sit at home waiting for their Perfect Mate to come to them as though Divine Intervention was a pizza man making a delivery. Ah, if only true love was so automated and predictable. And conveinient.

Ok. Well, actually it can be easier, but accomplishing anything worthwhile does takes some active intent on your part. It's just not enough to just expect miracles to happen on their own. The Law of Attraction states that you do need to set some intent in motion. In other words, you need to take some form of action.

Love is Like Real Estate.... Location, Location, Location

First of all, let's examine what your current game plan for finding your Perfect Mate. Are you always doing the same thing on a Saturday night? Are you always going to the same local hangout? Are you living in a remote area where your choices in meeting someone new are limited? Your Digital Matchmaker If you answered yes to those questions, then your computer may be your best matchmaker. In this case, I would strongly suggest internet dating. Right away some of you are panicking and thinking, "Oh, no.. not me. I'm not that desperate." Trust me - desperation is not the your worst problem here... lack of options - is a bigger threat.

When your choices are limited to your surroundings (and not-so-distant relatives) you may want to think over that internet dating taboo that you've convinced yourself you're so terrified of. Will you have lousy experiences? Well, sure there are a lot of cuckoo birds in the world and any one of those fools could own a computer and register at the same internet dating service that you are. And if they managed to get that far, they could certain respond to your ad in particular.

However, by using the internet you are opening up a whole new world of possibilities (admittedly, both bad and good). I often tell my customers waiting at home is like fishing with just a pole. You may not be fishing "in the right spot". To make matters worse, you could be fishing in that wrong spot for hours. Or days. Or years. Or forever.

On the other hand, internet dating is like fishing with a net. You may catch a lot of useless crap or creepy stuff that has to be tossed right back, but the plus is your chances of finding the right person increase, mathematically as well. Ah, finally... a use for all that math you learned in high school.

The Creative Dating GamePlan

Let's go over a few other options to meet someone new:
  • Tell the world you are looking to meet someone special. Have your friends set you up on a blind date.
  • Try exploring dating or matchmaking services - yes, there really are people that can help you find a person more suited to your taste. To find one, either pick up the phonebook or try Google.
  • Personal Ads - Why not? If you are worried about people recognizing you, hide behind a clever username. And stop worrying!
Whatever technique you use, be sure to do something. When it comes to stretching out and doing something new, Fear is the biggest block in your way of  leading a happy life. When it comes to Love, you need to confront your fears head-on and annihilate them.

The Holy Grail of True Love

Setting out on the honorable mission of Meeting the Right Person is like pursuing the Quest for the Holy Grail.... except (thankfully) it's a whole lot easier. But like that Grail quest, you will meet a lot of forks in the road, and encounter a lot of silly (sometimes frustrating) situations that can sidetrack you from were you want to go by chipping away at your confidence and your belief that Love is out there waiting for you. So you have to be like Braveheart - well... with a happy ending, anyway. You can't be worried about looking foolish, or desperate or hopeless for that matter. You can't let fear control your life.

My Last Little Love Note to You

Love waits for the brave and the committed. It is reserved for those that believe in it and will not accept anything less or in place of it.

Love requires strenghth and commitment. So be Brave! Love is not for the squimish! So go for it!

Related Links:
posted Monday, April 02, 2007 1:20 PM by kittenit | 15 Comments
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Are You Waiting for Mr. Right.... or Are You Afraid of Commitment? Part 1 of 2

I talk to a lot of customers who tell me they want to get married and settle down, but they just aren't finding the right person. After talking to them, I often find that they are either not ready for the right relationship or they are "waiting" for the right person to come along. Does this describe you? Let's have a think about this.

How to Tell If You are Not Ready

Ok. Let's do a quick visualization. Visualize yourself finding that perfect person. Close your eyes and see yourself with your perfect mate... on your wedding day. Imagine yourself in your dream wedding dress. Visualize all the fanfare and fru-fru. See your family and friends (even the ones you don't like) all watching you, smiling and crying tears of joy (or envy!). Now let's take this visualization further. The wedding music is playing.  You see your groom in the tuxedo. Now see yourself saying, "I do!" You are about to be married for the rest of your life.

How are you feeling right now? Are you experiencing stress? Are you worried? Are you panicking? What problems are you having with this visualization, if any? When you are having this visualization, are you finding your heart rate is doubling for the wrong reasons? Are you having an anxiety attack? If you answered yes to any of these reasons, you may have a problem with commitment. By doing this visualization, you are bringing deep-seated negative feelings to the surface. You are flushing out the fears, worries and insecuries that are preventing you from meeting the perfect person and finding your way to the alter with them. You are getting your mind around what has been sabotaging your love life.

The Good News

The good news is, if you repeat this visualization, it actually helps you get past the block you may be having. When you visualize yourself doing the thing you want to see happen, you train your subconscious to accept this as a reality. Your subconscious worries, thoughts and fears start to fade and are replaced with more comfortable feelings.

The  Secret of Winners

This visualization process is not a new technique. It is something that has been used in top businesses and professional sports for years. Even better news - you can use this technique in your relationships as well. Visualize yourself in a long-term, committed relationship. Are you panicking? Better do the visualization again. Your subconscious may be freaking out. Continue to do this visualization until you actually "feel better" about the images you are seeing. Direct your emotions and find a way to be joyous at your own wedding.

How Long is This Going to Take?

According to hypnotists and others educated in the human mind works, it takes about 28-30 days to change a habit that has been embedded in the subscious. Personally, I think that time depends on the person. However, what is important to remember if you slip back and have another bout of anxiety, time to visualize again. Persistence is the key.

The Next Issue Part II :  Are You Waiting For Prince Charming?

In my next blog, I will talk about how to tell if you are waiting for Mr. Right to just show up.

About Kittenit

I am a clairvoyant , tarot reader, life coach and writer. I've been giving advice on Keen for over 4 years.

Be sure to subscribe to my blogs!
posted Monday, April 02, 2007 10:35 AM by kittenit | 2 Comments
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Issue #1 - What is the Law of Attraction

Kittenit's Law of Attraction Newsletter


Issue #1: Welcome to the Law of Attraction Newsletter

What if you could have, be or do anything you want?

Welcome to the first issue of the Law of Attraction (LOA) newsletter. I am really looking forward to sharing this information with you. This newsletter will give ideas as to how you can achieve anything you want in life. How you can manifest money, a great job, the perfect relationship - a great life. How you can have, be or do anything you want, all by being aware of this special universal law.

Who am I?

My name is Kittenit. I've been an adviser on Keen for over four years. I'm a clairvoyant and a tarot reader. Besides doing psychic readings, I also have a talent for picking up on people who have passed on. I have also served as a channel for insights from Spirit that I will share with you at some point in this newsletter.

In addition, through much reading and life experience I've come upon insights so profound and life-changing, I feel compelled to share it with others. One of these topics is the Law of Attraction and how it affects us. That's what this newsletter is about.

What is the Law of Attraction (or LOA)?

The LOA is one of many natural laws of the Universe. These laws include the Law of Gravity and the Law of Cycles and others. When we follow these natural laws, life is easier. When we don't, they can wreck havoc on our lives. And these laws do not discriminate or play favorites. The Law of Gravity doesn't care if you are a good or bad person. It doesn't care how much money or influence you have. If a rich man and homeless man both jumped out of a 10-story window, gravity will bring both to the ground with equal force. That is how the Law of Gravity works.

So while the Law of Gravity states, "Whatever goes up, must come down", the Law of Attraction states, "That which is like unto itself is drawn". That means, "Like attracts like". And just the way the Law of gravity does not discriminate in who it brings to the ground, the Law of Attraction doesn't discriminate in what it brings to you, or if want it or not. If you focus on something - bad or good - you'll get it.

How to Recognize the LOA

Have you ever thought about someone you haven't seen for awhile and shortly later they phoned you up? Or you run into them in an unlikely place? Have you ever desired something - and it shows up? Or you find one at a garage sale? What you have experienced is the Law of Attraction in action.

Another way the LOA manifests is when we complain about how bad our relationships are - then we find ourselves attracting the same type of person again and again. Or we know someone who is always telling us about their health problems and we see that they manifest new problems.

The Lucky

Then there are those magical people that get everything they dream about. They marry their perfect mates, have amazing kids or great careers. They seem to live charmed lives. Or maybe they have bigger dreams. Like the college dropout passionate about an idea that every person should have a computer in their home. The young black girl who grew up in the South and affirmed that she would be on TV one day. The four musical young boys from a lower class part of England who chanted they would have records at the top of the charts. Any of this sound familiar? Perhaps you've heard of Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey or the Beatles.

Were they all just lucky? Was it just good timing? Or was something more powerful at work? What if their success is due to a scientific principal which can be recreated by understanding how it works? We'll examine this in the next LOA newsletter, titled, Everything is Energy.

Think About It

Take a moment to think about the types of persons or situations you see manifesting in your life, over and over. What do you tend to focus on? What is your attitude about your life, career or relationships? Are you living your dream... or someone else's? If you had a genie's lamp with just ONE wish and could manifest anything you wanted right now - no matter how unbelievable or how expensive or big - what would you ask for? Think about it. We'll talk more next time.

Love & Light,

Kittenit
ABOUT KITTENIT:
Clairvoyant, Life Coach,
Writer
ONLINE HOURS:
Weekdays: 8:00am-8:00pm
Weekends: Hours, variable
(800) ASK-KEEN
(800) 275-5336
x5683 (or type "LOVE" on
your phone keypad)
CONTACT KITTENIT:
Need a reading or life advice?


Suggestions, comments?
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posted Sunday, April 01, 2007 4:36 PM by kittenit | 47 Comments
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