Sure, hindsight is 20/20, but what can we do now, on a practical level, to wash our hands of the damage done?
There is a time of year [Virgo] when the universe supports us in going back to review our past actions and repair the holes we created. But we don't have to wait for Virgo to clean house.
As time increases between cause and effect - the cause being the nasty action, the effect being the nasty cosmic kickback - there is greater likelihood those actions will be repeated. Chances are, the bully is still bullying, but is just not aware of it.
Rather than wait for the right time of year, let's nip it in the bud now.
This is where all the clichés come in: it's never too late to say I'm sorry, loving someone means never having to say I'm sorry, and so on. All that is fine and good, but at the end of the day you want to be able to move forward in your life, free of the guilt and self torture - as well as being a better person for having gone through what you've gone through.
Remember, it's not about being a nice guy. It's about correcting those parts of our soul that are not perfect.
This week, we can take the opportunity - and I recommend you do it more than once - to think about those behaviors and situations where we tainted the lives of others.
Close your eyes, take deep breaths, and let the memories come.
Do you feel bad?
Do you feel guilty?
Do you think you're the worst person to walk the earth?
Don't. That's not what we're after. People often mistake guilt with spirituality. We think that if we beat ourselves up, we are absolved. It doesn't work that way. Self-beating doesn't help us change. What we want to do is be conscious of how we acted and to commit to doing it differently next time.
If you are serious about removing evil from your past so it doesn't chase you down at every turn, then you will be willing to take time to rewind your mind and search for those imperfect moments.
One important thing to remember is that desire is what draws us together. Desire for world peace, desire for love, desire for pizza, desire for new shoes. No matter how profound or trivial, human desires are our common link. And everyone desires happiness. Yet we often mistake someone else's search for happiness as being "anti-me."
How often, for example, have you thought a friend, a teacher, or a relative was mad at you because they'd been giving you less attention than usual, only to discover they'd had a personal tragedy in their lives - perhaps a death, an illness, or a family quarrel - that was simply making them withdraw for a bit? Not just from you, but from everyone, until they felt settled again.
I once knew a young woman called Anna [not her real name] who ran into the sister of her first great love, Matt [not his real name.] The two women chatted for a while, and then Anna gave her number to Matt's sister, who said she would happily pass it along. Anna was incredibly excited at the prospect of hearing from Matt. He had meant a lot to her both during their relationship and over a number of years, but they had lost touch.
Weeks passed, and then several months. No call. Anna took it personally. "I must not have mattered as much to him as he did to me," she thought. "If he truly had feelings for me, then he would have called me by now." Anna's thoughts became worse and worse until finally she became quite bummed out about the whole thing.
Several months after that, Matt called. He and Anna had a great talk, at the end of which he apologized for not having called her sooner. "I've had a horrible skin disease," he confided in her. "And I wanted it to clear up before seeing you."
When we take the actions of other people personally, this is our ego speaking, telling us that we are the center of the universe - that everything that happens in our lives revolves around us. Our ego is the curtain separating us from other people's true feelings and thoughts.
Our struggle is to not take everything personally. And to give with our whole heart, even if our judgment is we are not getting enough in return. When we do our part, the energy comes back to us - always. If not from the receiver, than from someone else. Positive seeds produce positive fruits. This is an immutable law.
And remember, sharing is not only a physical thing. Making room in your heart for others and acknowledging that you are not the only person in the world who wants to be fulfilled, can be the best gift to give to your loved ones - and to yourself.
I am now switching off the destructive thoughts that emanate from my ego. In the space that I've opened, a gentle radiance of spiritual Light appears.
To let go does not mean to stop caring; it means I can't do it for someone else.
To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another, it's to make the most of myself.
To let go is not to care for but to care about.
To let go is not to fix but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge but to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to protect, it's to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold, or argue but instead to search about my own shortcomings and correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.