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Saturday, April 04, 2009 12:37 PM

Where do I go from here?

I was talking with a friend not long ago who brought up a subject many of us may be faced with.  Life changes, and approaching different phases of our lives.  This comes in many forms; sometimes it's in the form of a divorce; sometimes it's when our children leave the nest; and sometimes it has to do with siimply entering a new phase of our lives which comes with that dreaded word.........aging, which is what my friend was faced with.

She is nearing the age of 60, not in a relationship, and her children have developed happy, productive lives.  Even though her life is full with work and her friends and family, she is wondering how she really fits into her own life.  This question came to her mind during a get together with family and friends, most of whom were younger than she.  In sitting back and observing them, she realized she could clearly remember when she was where they now were.  She felt to old to "join in" because she had already been there, done that, yet she doesn't know where to go from here.   It seems that the solution would simply be to spend time with friends her own age, but they are either married or in relationships, or worse yet, have resigned themselves to the fact that "I'm too old for that" mentality.   And the latter group is the one she is trying to avoid - where the phrase she hears so many times is "at our age.....bla, bla, bla" . 

I had no clear answer for my friend, but it give me a lot to think about.  I have come to the conclusion that it isn't just her age bracket, that would be too simple.  I feel that we are faced witih the same dilema as we enter our 20's and realize that we are no longer those carefree teenagers; when we are in our 30's and caught up in the creation of our lives; and when we are in our 40's and thinking we finally have the answers.  Approaching middle age, the 50's, is when we realize that we didn't have a clue, but now that I have all this wisdom, what do I do with it....where do I go from here? 

I guess the answer to my friends question is that life does seem to hit us in segments, and it seems these segments come at 10 year intervals, each segment being a step forward.  I would love to say that we should embrace each interval with the wisdom we gained from the past segment.  I would love to say that this is a time in our lives when we can re-invent ourselves and do and be whatever we want.  I would love to say that this is a time to pass on the wisdom we have attained to the younger generations.  But when, as my friend is doing, in the wee hours just before dawn we find ourselves alone, it doesn't help much.   Whether it's her particular situation, entering a new segment of our lives, or facing the end of a relationship, we ask ourselves the same question.........where do I really go from here?

posted by schelly16 | 2 Comments
Wednesday, August 06, 2008 12:09 PM

Let Go of the String!

Let go and let God, turn it over to the Universe, don't worry about it.  We've all heard those phrases time and time again, right?  But believe me, it's easier said than done.  It is, however, the key to unlocking so many doors, once we learn to do it.   To many it is so easy, but for most of us, releasing is a very difficult thing to do. 

I'm a very visual person, so when I release something to the Universe, I have to see it happening.  One of the easiest, and actually most fun, for me is to buy a big mylar balloon and a magic marker.  On the balloon I write everything I want - actually, when I get to this point, I'm usually demanding, and that's okay.  My balloon is covered in things I want, how I want to feel, and anything I need to release.  Sometimes it's releasing anger, frustration, worry, financial concerns, need, desire, but by the time I'm finished, my balloon is literally covered with my writings. 

When this is done and you feel that sense of completion, walk outside, look to the heavens and let go of the string.  Watch as the balloon drifts into the clouds, out of sight.  What we've just done is the easy part.  The hard part is really knowing that we've let go of the string and it's out of our hands, and many times we will need to remind ourselves that we've turned it over to the specialists.  I was once, during a reading, given the analogy of being served with a legal summons.  If you know nothing of the legal process, the first thing you start doing is worrying and getting into a state of panic.  Then, finally, we walk into the lawyer's office, drop the packet on the desk and walk out the door.  We've released it to the specialist, knowing that it's out of our hands and we usually have a sense of relief.  That feeling is a huge part of the releasing.  We don't call the lawyer every day to see if he fixed it, or maybe some of us do, but not a good idea.  When it enters our mind, we simply dismiss it because we've given it to the expert. 

When you let go of the string, visualize turning all those worries and issues over to the expert.  Experience the sense of relief in having done that, having taken all those things off our plate, allowing us to move on with a sense of empowerment.  In the beginning it may seem like we use this technique as a last resort, but seeing the sometimes immediate benefits, we begin to release a lot sooner.  It works for me every time, without exception.

posted by schelly16 | 1 Comments
Tuesday, July 15, 2008 1:25 PM

Remember the Magic

Every relationship has a time when it's totally magic.  When your heart pounds and the sound of his voice on the phone, when each morning is greeted with a sense of excitement and a sense that something this good is the real thing and will last forever.  Sometimes it does.  But sometimes it's fleeting.  Personally, I've experienced both, and until not so recently I would have said that I choose the real thing that lasts forever over the fleeting - hands down!  What I've realized lately is that there is really no difference - it's all the same when we remember the magic.  Yeah right, you're saying......tell me that when my heart is broken.  I know, I've been there, too. 

When I do a reading, I focus so much on the feelings we're having or want to have and the energy created by that feeling.  It can be very frustrating to the client I'm reading for, but it's extremely powerful, and it's also a choice.   That is another buzz word.....we don't want to feel that we have chosen this gut wrenching experience, for who in their right mind would choose that, right?  But the flip side of that is, if we chose the magic, didn't we also choose the gut wrenching agony?  And if it is all a matter of choice, why not simply choose the magic, accept it for what it has given us, treasure it, and remember it. 

This applies to so many areas of our lives, whether it's a love lost to another or a love lost to death.  It's still a loss.  The late husband still lives with us because we remember the magic, rather than the pain we endured over the loss.  The lover who was there for just a short time, rather than agonizing over the pain of his leaving, choose to remember that magical feeling that accompanied even that short time. 

We carry the magic with us, casting away the burdens of the pain of the loss, and that magic ignites the light within us, creating even more of the magic, and that's just so lovely! 

posted by schelly16 | 7 Comments
Saturday, June 23, 2007 10:46 AM

Bird Flies at the Window, Death Knocks at the Door? Reposted by Request.

I've heard this ominous saying for years, and it still sends chills over my body.  Similar to "step on a crack, you break your mother's back" - my mother passed over years ago, but I still avoid the sidewalk cracks.  My question, however, is what does it really mean when a bird flies at your window?  Not just once, but again and again? 

My sister told me months ago about a little red bird that has been flying at her window every day, sometimes a dozen times.  When he isn't hitting the window, he is perched on the arm of a patio chair, and it was at the point where she was really becoming concerned because she, too, had heard the ominous phrase. 

I finally did a reading for her and was told that this bird was there to protect her, and he was also warning her of potential danger.  Clearly, not a death, but just telling her to be aware of potential dangers around her.   She took the warning to heart, took extra care to avoid accidents around the home, and she even went so far as to have a security system installed.   Three days after having the system in place, she was awakened to the screeching sound of the security alarm, and found someone attempting to open her downstairs door.  Fortunately the police were called out and the intruder was apprehended.  Coincidence?  I think not, and neither does she.  Her bird has since stopped flying into the window, but he still sits on the chair, her little guardian angel, watching over her.

My point in all of this?  Be aware that our Guardian Angels take many forms, and I believe that their attempts to get our attention will continue and become stronger until we get the message.  So don't force the little bird to break your window.  Be aware of the sights and sounds, the seen and the un-seen around us, because the protection and the message is always there. 

posted by schelly16 | 231 Comments