The Journey to Illumination

The Ibis Sign

Mike Pace — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 21:05:00 GMT

Have you ever been forced to suddenly stop what you were doing? Did you get angry at the event like I did recently? According to Native American folklore, the White Ibis represents danger and optimism.

Recently I was racing to an appointment that I was running late to. Somewhat familiar with the neighborhood, I turned off the GPS and veered onto a windy single lane road with a steep incline hill. The clock read that I had 6 minutes to get there, but I knew I had at least 8 more drive time minutes. I saw in my peripheral vision a school bus heading into the same direction. Like you, I didn’t want to get stuck behind a school bus making those frequent stops, so I hit the gas.

Just as I attempted to go that much faster I reached the top of the hill and encountered a flock of White American Ibis birds crossing the road. Having no other choice but to stop I was seething at the birds waiting impatiently until they crossed. One lone Ibis behind the rest of the flock seemed to be mocking me as it took its time crossing. Its red beak was high in the air as if it was sticking his nose up at me. Honestly, I thought…keep walking! Those 45 seconds certainly seemed like eternity.

Descending down the hill while winding around the bend I wondered what the bird was trying to tell me, then it suddenly became clear. Just a yard a head of me a bunch of kids on their bikes racing like me except for one little girl that lost her balance on her tricycle. Barely able see her on the ground because she was in the shadow cast by the big oak tree on the street corner, I was able to stop in time to watch her get up back on her bike. I was angry with myself wondering what if I didn’t stop in time? What if I had my sunglasses on would I have been able to see her? I then wondered what if those Ibises didn’t get in my way.

It’s said that the Ibis bird is the last to be seen before a hurricane strikes, and the first to emerge once the storm has passed. I was grateful for my sign and remembered that if things are too hard to accomplish then perhaps it’s not meant to be. Things like trying too many times to fix that broken relationship or go against your gut instinct that says it just doesn’t fit right. How often has that happened to you?

Forward Thinking

Mike Pace — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 17:26:00 GMT

OK, so while we are only a days into winter I am already thinking about spring. Here are a couple of pictures that I took last spring while traveling through Boston.

These are my favorites! Nothing says winter is over with tulips popping with brilliant colors. I will be counting the days until spring arrives.

If she can do it - we all can!

Mike Pace — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 06:42:00 GMT

Merry Christmas!

A Mom From Christmas Past

Mike Pace — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 19:46:00 GMT

Christmas arrived early for me this year. Last night in a dream Annette, a second mother to me from my early teen years, came to visit bringing me a very special gift.

Annette was Debbie and Mara’s mother, two of my closest friends growing up. Annette took a strong liking to me and always made sure that I was included in all of their family adventures including vacations, birthdays or even simple dinners out. She was that giving with me all the way up to three years ago when she died.

In my dream, Annette and I were walking through Miami Beach. I immediately noticed how much younger she looked. She was noticeably thinner and her hair was the biggest and brightest shade of red I’ve ever seen. What was truly a relief to see was how graceful and easy it was for her to walk. She seemed to be gliding along rather than limping and out of breath as I used to know her to be. She smiled at me as she noticed that I had puzzled, but pleasant look upon my face.

While walking along Washington Avenue she pointed out some places where she used to work. Clothing shops that have incarnated a few times over again and a few hotels that still exist today. While strolling along the avenue Annette referenced that she had a bitter fight with her sister “right in front of that store” that lasted for years and years. She said it was on of her biggest regrets because she missed many family events including weddings and birth announcements of the beautiful little babies that her nieces and nephews had. “But I am in a place where I can see them all now” she said wiping a few tears away from her sun blushed cheeks.

We went over to Collins Avenue where Annette showed me a couple of places where she once lived, then we stopped at a three story white apartment building with an impressive purple bougainvillea draping down the south side of the house. Annette stood there for a second then whispered, while being coy, that this was the place she had the most fun at before she met Joel! Joel was her husband for over 40 years. We finished our walk right in front of the Betsy Hotel on A1A. She sighed and said; “I am so glad she’s back.” Then handed me a box that was wrapped in traditional Hanukah paper. “You didn’t forget that I’m Jewish?” she jokingly asked. Inside the box was a picture frame with two sets of photographs side by side.

On one side of the frame was a picture of me with my parents. On the other side was Joel, Debbie, Mara, myself and Annette standing behind us three kids smiling wide from ear to ear with her arms spread out embracing us. I thanked her for the gift and graciously told her that she has always been so incredibly generous to me. This picture is especially meaningful since I’ve never seen it before. My eyes focused in on Joel and Mara. They both left us many years before, certainly way too soon. When I looked back up from the photograph Annette was gone and I thought she was probably going to the Betsy for a white wine Spritzer – her favorite late afternoon cocktail.

When I awoke I started to journal the dream/visit then called Debbie. After a few laughs Debbie asked me if I had known that mom lived in Miami Beach? “No” I said, “but thanks for telling me.”

Once I finished talking to her, I called both my parents and arranged a Christmas reunion with both of them present asking them to put aside their differences.

Joel, Mara and Annette at Mara's Sweet 16 party.

Top Ten Tips to Beat the Holiday Blues!

Mike Pace — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 18:26:00 GMT

This can be a wonderful time of year, but also a crummy time! I've been there myself and these are a few things that I've used that have helped me get over the blue period.

1. You need to connect with people. The worst thing you can do is isolate yourself from the very people that even God may want to use to encourage and restore you. Make plans. Don’t sit around and wait to be invited.

2. Set realistic goals. Organize your time by making lists and setting your priorities in order. We often worry the most about the things that matter the least thus creating more chaos in our lives than needed.

3. Make a budget and follow it. You don’t need to spend a lot of money on things. In fact giving someone a picture of you and them in an inexpensive frame is all you need.

4. Contact someone you’ve lost touch with. This is a perfect time to rekindle a lost relationship. You may find that it begins a new chapter in your life. No matter what kind of relationship it was.

5. Don’t be afraid to pray. TELL God/The Universe/All That Is what EXACTLY you want in your life. Tell your spirit helpers that you are ready to be guided to those people that can help YOU manifest all that you desire. Don’t forget, we have to ASK for what we want. But honest with God and yourself about your situation.

6. Get plenty of rest. People tend to eat, drink and party too much during the holidays. None of those activities are conducive to a good night’s sleep. The more worn out you get, the more susceptible you are to depression and discouragement. Work out as much as you can even if that’s a brisk walk through the park or even grocery store!

7. Let go of the past and find new or different ways to celebrate. While many family traditions are good, you may feel in bondage to doing things you don’t enjoy because “that’s the way we’ve always done it.” Start a new tradition - get a puzzle and have everyone join in putting it together. Wear funny hats while opening up gifts or add different details to the already existing traditional holiday stories.

8. Don’t overindulge in holiday foods. There is a genuine, negative physiological effect from foods high in sugar and fat. Additionally, you may struggle with guilt from overindulging. Moderation is the key.

9. Don’t focus on what you don’t have - focus on what you do have. If you think about it, it won’t take you long to envision someone in a worse situation than yours. God has neither abandoned nor forgotten you.

10. Get out of yourself and into other people. Your best insurance against an empty holiday is pouring yourself into someone else. You’ll find that your burden eases as you invest your life in another.

Just for Fun!

Mike Pace — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 23:55:00 GMT

Recently I sent an email asking some of my clients what was their worst first date and what they learned from it since everything in life is a lesson. Here are some VERY funny replies. I changed names around to protect the GUILTY! Please feel free to add some of your worst first dates, but please KEEP IT CLEAN!

A Picture Sometimes Isn’t Worth 15 Minutes

I met the guy on a dating website and his profile said he was 35 (I was 30). Since he looked OK in his picture I agreed to meet him in a bar in Miami for a drink. I arrived and scanned the bar for my date. I had noticed this weird looking guy with a bad comb over (worse than “The Donald”) sitting by the door, but he was old so it couldn’t be him. Sure enough, after a minute I hear my name being called and I turn around and it is bad car wreck looking Trump guy. I was like, where is the back door and fast?!

Since my identity was blown, I went over to meet this guy - I created a fantasy in my head that he commissioned his father to tell me that he wasn’t coming. Shocked, I agreed to sit and have a drink, where I learned that the guy was 55!!! Responding to my direct question of why he had lied about his age he responded ‘Some people can’t handle the truth!’ Turns out the picture was of his nephew! Although I wanted to jet out of there, I listened for about 15 minutes. That was my mistake. He took that as a sign that I accepted his lie and proceeded to put his hand on mine. I cleared up that mistake very quickly by pouring the drink on his lap and took off. Lesson learned; next time I will just walk out. I won’t enable anyone’s lies! Anne – Sunny Isles, Florida

Killing Time isn’t Downing a Beer

I agreed to go out with a guy I meet at a local bar who was pretty drunk when we met but, honestly, most people you meet in bars are drunk right? After all, I was a bit tipsy myself. Anyway, when I arrived at the place for dinner I watched him walk over to his car. I assumed he forgot his wallet or whatever, so I walked up to the front door of the restaurant. When he met me back at the door I asked him if he forgotten something from his car? He said no, that he arrived a little early and thought it would be a good time for a beer. I thought at first that he just needed a little liquid courage so I jokingly asked if he drank everywhere he went? He said, ‘Of course, I keep a 6 pack on the floor in the back of my car and since I don’t mind warm beer, it works out just fine!’ I then went on to tell him he had a drinking problem jokingly because I thought we were joking. He then made the comment, ‘I don’t think I have a problem but I do start court mandated classes starting Monday since I’ve gotten 3 D.U.I.s this year.’ At that moment I said to him that I forgot my cell phone in my car and that I needed to get it to call the sitter and asked him for his car keys so I could help myself to a warm beer. Would you believe the dope gave me his keys! On the way out of the restaurant I tossed his keys in the trash can and I took off. Lesson learned; when a man is being honest believe him! Cindy - Dallas

Now I Know Why Women Cheat

My lovely Jewish mother’s favorite hairstylists’ receptionist has a son around my age that is single and employed. You gotta love those really. OK, I’ll bite I thought, ‘what the heck…it’s been a few years since I went out on a blind date anyway….how bad could it be?

After an hour and a half listening to Mr. B talk about what a tramp and terrible person his ex-wife was, he finally asked me “So what happened with your last relationship?” I replied it didn’t work out, and if it did I wouldn’t be here. When pressed for details, I replied I did not invite my ex tonight so I see no reason to discuss it. Mr. B still did not get the hint and then provided me graphic details of his ex-wife’s cheating escapades! Fun Fun Fun!! I heard about young men and learned what the term cougar meant. I heard about the gardener and his tools, I head about how he walked in on his second wife fooling around with her sons principal. I was so bored and tired about hearing how awful these women were that I actually caught myself secretly fantasying about cheating on him even though I’ve known him for 90 minutes! Lesson learned; if a man brings his ex to dinner....enjoy your meal, have a glass of wine and then do not go out with him again. He’s more focused on how angry he is with his ex than having a lovely evening with you. By the way, I did get a trip out of my mother…to Cancun! I deserved it! Jamie – Boston.

Time away

Mike Pace — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 11:10:00 GMT

Good day!

Took a little time away for some R&R, but I will be able to take a few calls tonight (Thursday). I'll try to log on as soon as I can, but look for me around 3:00PM EST. I am back to a regular schedule starting Monday. CHEERS!!

A Happy Ending With A New Beginning!

Mike Pace — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 14:40:00 GMT

I received this email the other day from a long time client that I wanted to share with everyone else. While I get so many emails each day, this one really made me feel special to her and it proves that when you have patience, love, self respect, and good communication skills, that the darkest dead end really and truly has a light in it. I hope it lifts your spirits as it did mine!

HI Mike,

I woke up this morning with you on my mind. I wanted to tell you that TODAY Brian and I are getting married! We are having a small ceremony with a Universalist Minister and a few friends, then we are leaving on a two week honeymoon which will be close to our families and we are going to spend some time with both sides of the family.

I wanted to thank you for your help over the years! I think I have been talking to you for 5 or 6 years now! I do know that this would not be possible if you had not translated Brian's crazy making behavior for me! Brian is excited and activng very happy in spite of all his prior resistances.

I appreciate you and all that you have done for me. Will give you more details when we return.

Best Wishes,.

Thanks Again,

Judi

Happy New Year!!!

Mike Pace — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 02:07:00 GMT

Wishing everyone a WONDERFUL New Year! 2008 is going to be a great year for us all!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Mike Pace — Thu, 22 Nov 2007 00:39:00 GMT

..and for everyone that already has their Xmas tree up (like I do) the Pilgrams did not come over on a sliegh ;)

MAN Speak - What we are REALLY Saying!

Mike Pace — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 19:01:00 GMT

                    Man Speak (what men say and what it really means)

A lot of folks say to me, “Mike, you’re a guy, what does this mean when my guy says…”

So I came up with some guy lines and my feelings of what they mean. Please understand that they don’t hold true for everyone, but if you feel like he is meaning something different than what he is saying, this may help. ☺

These are some meanings for the not -so - emotionally available men.

1.   I have something going on tonight, but I can stop by later. - Definition: Booty call

2.   I have an early morning meeting. – Definition: I don’t want you to spend the night

3.   I don’t want to get hurt again. – Definition: I can handle just being NSA friends

4.   I don’t know what I am looking for. – Definition: I don’t want a relationship

5.   Come over for a drink. – Definition: Come over for sex

6.   Doing anything exciting over the weekend? – Definition: I have plans this weekend.

7.   Work is out of control lately, not sure when I can see you. – Definition: I am going into my cave and I’ll get back to you.

On the flip side, here are some examples of some eager guys with true intentions!

1.   Want to spend the weekend with me? - Definition: I really like you and I am moving you to the front of the line and blowing off my friends, family, and even dog!

2.   Want to come to my company picnic? -Definition: I want everyone to see what a knock out you are and how lucky I am.

3.   Want to take a drive up to the mountains for Labor Day Weekend? (It’s July right now). – Definition: I am really into you and I am booking time way in advance.

4.   I want you to meet my family and get to know everyone. – Definition: You could be the one.

5.   You're beautiful. - Definition: You're beautiful.

The Mountain Story

Mike Pace — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 16:20:00 GMT

With Father’s Day just around the corner, I have been thinking about my own father and the important things he taught me as I was growing up. When I recently read this story, it reminded me of some of those valuable lessons. I hope you like it as much as I did.

A son and his father were walking on the mountains.
Suddenly, his son falls, hurts himself and screams: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"
To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating, somewhere in the mountain: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"
Curious, he yells: "Who are you?"
He receives the answer: "Who are you?"
And then he screams to the mountain: "I admire you!"
The voice answers: "I admire you!"
Angered at the response, he screams: "Coward!"
He receives the answer: "Coward!"
He looks to his father and asks: "What's going on?"
The father smiles and says: "My son, pay attention."
Again the man screams: "You are a champion!"
The voice answers: "You are a champion!"
The boy is surprised, but does not understand.
Then the father explains: "People call this ECHO, but really this is LIFE.

It gives you back everything you say or do.
Our life is simply a reflection of our actions.
If you want more love in the world, create more love in your heart.
If you want more competence in your team, improve your competence.
This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life;
Life will give you back everything you have given to it."

YOUR LIFE IS NOT A COINCIDENCE. IT'S A REFLECTION OF YOU!"
-- Unknown Author

Happy Mother's Day!

Mike Pace — Sun, 13 May 2007 15:26:00 GMT

Wishing all the moms a very happy mother's day!

Flying and other crummy OUT OF CONTROL Fears!

Mike Pace — Tue, 17 Apr 2007 19:53:00 GMT

I don’t about you guys, but the older I get the more I ABSOLUTLY hate flying! (I know, I know… it’s not nice to hate). Tomorrow I have to go to NY for what I thought would be a nice catch up with friends and family for a few days is now going to turn out to be mostly a “dig out from the mud” party from the recent Nor’easter. Should be fun, right??

Anyway, I really do not consider myself having control issues, and I have a pretty keen sense what works for me and what doesn’t, and if it doesn’t - I usually will not set myself up for failure…well, except for buying Oreo cookies and convincing myself that having an entire row is OK so long as I do extra cardio at the gym! But seriously, when I was in my 20’s and 30’s I couldn’t wait to get on a plane and go away! In fact, I was one of those crazy fools that when the plane hit some turbulence I would bounce up and down in my seat for the added effect!

So why do I get the sweats when I have to get on an airplane NOW? Do we suddenly develop FEARS? I am not afraid to die, as I know life does exist after death. Someone told me that perhaps I need to get my affairs in order so I don’t feel like I leave anything undone should something happen. I tried that, but it didn’t really work. ANY other SUGGESTIONS??? What fears do you have that you want to let go of?

Slacker!

Mike Pace — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 16:52:00 GMT

That's my note to self about getting another blog entry started! Thanks for the comments and I hope I was able to shed some new light on a very old subject. Stay tuned!!