Yes, it's a wonderful thing to meet and match up with your soulmate – that one person in the world who complements you most. For most, the natural next step is to bond, form a solid love relationship, become intimate partners and eventually make it to the altar. But not all soulmates make it that far for a myriad of reasons. Instead some choose to become only good friends.
When Donna, her husband and children moved into their new home a few years back, they immediately struck up a friendship with their next-door neighbors. As soon as Donna met John, the head of that family, there was a familiarity that was beyond any logical explanation. It was as if they had known each other forever. They clicked, bonded and became instant friends. They talked for hours sharing their joys and sorrows as well as the mundane details of day-to-day life. But it wasn't until she started dreaming of him night after night did she ever imagine that he was her true soulmate. Many of the dreams were of a transcendent nature, otherworldly and heavenly with John holding out the light to her and telling her he loved her. Donna said her heart cracked open in a way she had never experienced before. She felt as if through John she had touched God. Because of these experiences, Donna was thrown into a whirlwind of confusion and decided to contact a psychic advisor for a reading. After all, she felt secure in her marriage, loved her husband and children and could never imagine breaking up two families to become intimate with John. The psychic advisor verified the twin flame connection between she and John. So, Donna began reading everything she could find on the topic of soulmates and concluded that what the advisor had told had to be true. She had to admit she now loved two men. But how to handle the situation became the question at hand. With the help of another psychic advisor, Donna understood the meeting with her divine complement had been divinely designed not necessarily to bring the two of them together as a couple but to bond two families in friendship. It was an unusual destiny to forego an intimate husband and wife partnership in favor of a long lasting friendship. But it was an interesting one through which two families could learn about love bonds with neighbors.
When the Plan Is Just to Be Friends
Although the vast majority of soulmate couples promise to bond in this life as romantic partners and to commit for life, some like Donna and John have planned an alternative relationship.
Soulmate promises are called karmic contracts and are sacred agreements to serve the consciousness of each other in a variety of ways. Some contracts are as general as, to nurture, bond closely and to love. The details of how to fulfill those promises are left up to the individuals during their incarnation together. Other contracts are more specific. For example, you may have promised to support your soulmate financially so that they would come to know the joy in receiving and the comfort in knowing they are taken care of by you. The karmic contracts are woven into a destiny plan that spells out some of the opportunities as well as the limitations you have chosen to experience for your lifetime together. Like Donna and John, your destiny plan may have been to only be friends, one that could prove very challenging if one of you was cognizant of the spiritual connection as soulmates and yearns to consummate a romance. But if you can swallow the reality, being great friends can be almost as fulfilling.
Darrell started out as Mary's husband's best friend. The friendship was so tight that Darrell was considered a member of the family. For 12 years, they socialized together, hanging out in Mary's home every weekend, watching football, sharing meals and doing everything friends do. Mary felt the connection with Darrell as much as her husband did and couldn't imagine life without either of her men. When Mary's husband died suddenly from a heart attack, Darrell was Mary's constant source of love and support. They grieved together and soon the bond moved from friends to something more. The truth was that Darrell and Mary were linked together spirit-to-spirit and soul-to-soul. They were divine complements – soulmates. Darrell had two important karmic contracts for his life, one with Mary and the other with his best friend. It was Mary's choice to support and help Darrell fulfill his promises with her husband. When they had completed their destiny with Mary's husband, a new chapter opened for Mary and Darrell to commit the rest of their lives to each other in a soulful bond as soulmates.
Robbed of the Romance
Sometimes soulmates wind up just friends because one of them is tied up in another relationship. No, it wasn't planned that way but it became a reality because one of them didn't wait. Now, there are other commitments, entanglements and sometimes children to consider that keep the pair at a distance. One such couple was Thomas and Laura. Laura came into Thomas' life two years into another love relationship. As with most soulmates, the attraction was too powerful to ignore and it soon became obvious to both that they were made for each other. But Thomas was caught between a rock and a hard place. He felt a strong sense of commitment and loyalty to the other woman. So much so, that he couldn't muster up the courage to break up with her. Laura was naturally frustrated, hoping and praying he would come to his senses. But after three years of waiting for the "big day", she conceded that day would probably never come. Now, they remain in intermittent contact sharing a small portion of their lives as friends.
How Important Is It to Remain Friends with Your Soulmate After a Breakup?
God knows it's hard to remain friends after a breakup with your soulmate. But if the breakup was amicable, the relationship can easily glide into a lasting friendship. By forgiving and blessing your partner's life you will do a lot to free them to move on. And you will have given them a gift few have been able to do – the gift of your continued love. If the romantic phase was short-lived, staying in contact and remaining friends can give you more time to complete karma carried over from previous lifetimes in which you failed to love and honor your soulmate. You will be able to continue to support them emotionally and be a guiding force in their life, thus completing on a favorable note. You could learn that becoming close friends after a nasty breakup can be regarded an even higher spiritual achievement than sticking it out living together in a poverty of love.
Other Love Advice Articles by Ariadne Green
|by Ariadne Green
Ariadne Green, MS, is a dream and soulmate expert and author of Divine Complement: The Spiritual Terrain of Soulmate Relationships
||Published: August 17, 2010