How to keep healthy boundaries in your relationships
The Script.......

I sometimes refer to the expectations that we may have of others as our script for the scene OR part we want to play out with certain people at certain times in our lives....
And wouldn't you know it, the other actor who we would like to bestow the major part does not possess the same script as me? Or he is reluctant to play that part at that time or EVER with us?
Who gave them a different script for this scene?
Who is directing this movie anyway?
If I want to walk out dramatically, how dare you not read the part I wanted you to play and come after me????

Where is the begging me to come back to you line gone? WHO re-wrote this scene?
Does it matter that I have sucked you dry before this dramatic scene by NOT being in control of my own emotions? It's the part I wanted to play, did you mean I have to take you into consideration too? HOW INCONVENIENT!!
Does it matter that I am blissfully unaware of my part in this?
Where is the loud crescendo of the proper music I ordered?
How dare you not show sufficient emotion and regret if I want you to!!
Where is the director anyway?
Who's working the lighting for this thing ?
They've got my bad side !!

What I have learned is Life is not a movie, we don't all get the same script and the expectations we have of others may not be realistically met. We are our own director, and we need to work with the scripts that others have as we do not get to write their's just as they do not get to write ours. But we need to temper the expectations of others as it is us who teaches people how to treat us, and to respect the boundaries of others and only welcome people in our lives that respect ours....


# re: The Script....... @ Tuesday, June 09, 2009 6:34 AM
This is brilliant Joan and I so agree.  All to often we forget to put ourselves in another's footprints or consider their needs when we are in need of nuturing.  It is a two way street and sometimes even more complex than that when numerous people are involved. It is important to realize our perceptions don't always match others.  Great blog Joan and brilliant analogy.

# re: The Script....... @ Tuesday, June 09, 2009 7:18 AM
There is an advertisement for a cell phone company and a wedding is taking place and the director is saying CUT the rain, where's the groom and where they end up bringing in a stunt groom and the mother says *JACKPOT* it made me laugh and it made me think that life just reminds me on a regular basis that we have to be our own directors, and we are the one who are driving the bus and in control....
# re: The Script....... @ Friday, May 21, 2010 4:25 PM
LOL!!!  I thought this was cute!!!
# re: The Script....... @ Saturday, May 22, 2010 7:33 PM
Oh, Joan, guilty as charged.
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