Brigid Bishop on Life, Love and The Art of Living

Insights, Musings and Out Takes on Life by New Age Author Brigid Bishop

The Aquarius

The Aquarian personality type is one that I know very, very well. Why?

Because I am one.

It manifests differently in the male and female, but several key characteristics are common to Aquarians of both sexes.

They are independent, intellectual, intelligent, loyal, stubborn, gregarious, determined and at times, very absent-minded.

Aquarians are truly the types that have many acquaintances but few close, intimate friends.

When an Aquarian allows you to become intimately close with them through either friendship or romance, believe that you are very special to them.

Aquarians live more in the mind than in the heart. Because Aquarians are of the element of air, they often have their head in the clouds, and what some may perceive as neglect or absence of interest is simply the Aquarian having a preoccupation with other thoughts at the time. Their absent-minded professor intellects also add to the frustrations of more emotional types. They honestly don’t believe that they are being inattentive to you when they get caught up in the daydreams and imaginations, they think that everyone’s mind wanders as theirs does and they feel the need for freedom more strongly than any other sign in the zodiac.

The Aquarian female is usually and customarily a masculine energy regardless of how feminine her appearance or her outward bearings are. They are less emotional than any other female sign of the zodiac, they are the most analytic sign as well.

If you are in love with an Aquarian female watch out when she taps into her emotions because they can be very overwhelming to her, positive or negative, as they are not something she can intellectually scrutinize and digest, she must “feel” them, and that is difficult for the Aquarian woman.

If you want a successful relationship with an Aquarian lady then give her plenty of space and freedom, but keep in touch with her so that she doesn’t forget about you while she’s off chasing rainbows and unicorns. Support her thoughts and ideas (she’ll have plenty of them to share), and you are well on your way to winning her true heart and friendship for life.

For an Aquarian male or female true love begins with being best friends. If you always remember to be a true friend to an Aquarian, you will always have a true friend, and if you are lucky enough to become their best friend, then you are the love of their life.

FAMOUS AQUARIAN WOMEN

Brigid Bishop, (lol), Jennifer Aniston, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Oprah Winfrey, Carmen Miranda, Angela Davis, Mia Farrow, Eartha Kit, Ida Lupino, Gertrude Stein, Natalie Cole, Kim Novak, Nastassja Kinski, Princess Caroline, Geena Davis, Jayne Seymour, Judy Blume, Alice Walker

The Aquarian male does not require a lot of maintenance.

Dating him can be quite an experience. Aquarians love change and sudden and impulsive “fun”!

One night your Aquarian male may take you to the opera, and the next to a clam bake on the beach with his “hippie” friends. He will be just as comfortable in his tuxedo as he will barefoot and bohemian and hedonistic.

Aquarian males need a lot of space.

This doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care for you, he just needs the time to investigate and explore on his own. When he finds places and people of true interest, he will be more than happy to introduce you to them, but he does need that independence to go out on his own.

A clingy, needy woman will never win the heart of an Aquarian male.

While he is out spelunking with friends don’t worry, try a little adventure of your own, it will make him become fascinated with you if you have your own adventures to share with him.

The Aquarian male is not a master of romance, however, he knows how to figure out what makes you tick, and if he likes the rhythm of your internal mechanisms, he will apply his brilliant intellect to surprising you with just the right types of dates and gifts and mementos to make you wonder if he’s for real.

The down side of the Aquarian persona is that they are the type to get so wrapped up in projects, careers or hobbies that they do appear to be neglectful. The easiest way to regain their interest if their pursuits are seemingly making them drift is to find an interest or hobby of your own that may fascinate them as well.

Freedom and friendship are the two key factors in having a successful relationship with any Aquarian.

If you want a lover that can truly be your best friend, enjoy riding a roller coaster as much as an eight year old, explain quantum physics and the theory of relativity to you in ten minutes, and live in the past, present and future with you simultaneously, then the Aquarius is for you!

If you have a question on the Aquarian personality type, please post it here and I will be happy to help you with it!

FAMOUS AQUARIAN MEN

Bob Marley, Paul Newman, John Travolta, Rick James, Edward Van Halen, James Dean, Arsenio Hall, Bobby Brown, Phil Collins, Yasir Arafat, Saul Williams,Tom Selleck, Robert Wagner, Burt Reynolds, James Dean, Neil Diamond, Mikhail Baryshnikov, Mozart, W.C. Fields, Abraham Lincoln, F.D. Roosevelt, Charles Dickens

The Pisces Personality Type

Around The Wheel With Aquarius

Around The Wheel with Aquarius

(Compatibility Profiles)

by Brigid Bishop

Here are some basic “Rules of Thumb” for Aquarian Compatibility Profiles. Of course, these are based on Sun Sign only, in order to truly plot compatibility it is best to have a professional compatibility profile done between the two charts, but this is a general description of the core energies to be expected.

Aquarius Male and Aries Female

This is a fairly good mix. The Aquarian Male will enjoy the fire and spunk of the Aries Female. Her independent streak and regal bearing will attract and fascinate him. She will be his intellectual equal and quite possibly his physical superior, being more active and on the go than the Aquarian Man of ideas and ideals. The trigger points usually stem from the Arian need to be more self centered and the Aquarian need to see the benefit to the larger picture.

Aquarius Female and Aries Male

This mix can be a bit more difficult than it’s reverse as the Aquarian Female will have a strong masculine energy which can cause the Arian Male to repel away a bit. She likes his strength and generosity, but his tendency toward self-centeredness will be hard for her to understand. He likes her detachment, it challenges him, but at the same time he longs to be the center of her universe, which she can never quite make happen, her universe is too multi-layered to have just one center.

Aquarius Male and Taurus Female

Both signs are “Fixed”, as in “unmovable”. The sensuality of the Taurean Female will draw the Aquarian male, but her need for earthbound pleasures and belongings will not match well with his idealism and daydreaming. She will appear to him as materialistic and he will appear to her as “flighty”. Sexual chemistry may be very strong, but without other positive aspects in the charts, the pairing is difficult at best.

Aquarius Female and Taurus Male

His “bull in the china shop” approach to life will be appealing to her at first, as it is so different from her own delicate and airy approach, it makes her feel more feminine to be around him, but when her independent side rears it’s pretty head, sparks can fly. The sexual chemistry here may be strong, but long term compatibility may be difficult without softer, more positive aspects within the charts. Both are fixed signs and need to be in control.

Aquarius Male and Gemini Female

A good pairing! Their high intellects are finely matched, they communicate together very well. The Aquarian Male’s philosophical approach to life matches well with the Gemini Female’s need to analyze life from polar opposite angles. Discussions between these two can lead to many late night conjuring and projections that will keep both engaged and interested in each other.

Aquarius Female and Gemini Male

A positive match but the danger here is that there may be a little too much air swirling around between them, living in the realm of ideas and thoughts, rather than putting their words into action. As they are both idea people, unless one of the personalities brings some fire (for action) and water (for emotion) into the mix, they may just drift endlessly in their own little fantasy world.

Aquarius Male and Cancer Female

This is a difficult match without other positive aspects in the two charts, the Aquarian Male is all air and the Cancer Female is the most watery sign of the zodiac. When you mix air and water you get a kind of “mist” dampening the positive energy between the two, which is why more elemental factors like fire are needed to turn the mist into steam. The Cancer Female is very emotional. The Aquarian Male is not. They will have a difficult time understanding each other. The independent Aquarian man will not like having the Cancer Crab’s claws locked into him. He will feel like she is trying to pull him under the surface of the ocean and will struggle to break free. The Cancer woman will lose the claw before she lets go.

Aquarius Female and Cancer Male

A better mix than the reverse genders, the biological energies are a little more suited to survival of the relationship here than the opposite mix. The Aquarian Female will feel loved and cared for, and although she may not know how to “intellectualize” his actions to understand them, they will make her feel good. Her independent streak will still create a struggle from time to time, but men being more outwardly focused can balance it to the point that they can cope if the love is truly there. The Cancer Male will find her truly fascinating and will learn to hold on loosely for the benefit of the relationship if other aspects are positive.

Aquarius Male and Leo Female

Opposites do attract at times, and when these two are well-balanced this pairing can be extremely complimentary to each other. The Aquarian Male loves her energy, her strength, her loyalty and the Leo Female loves his intelligence, his independence and his loyalty. These two can literally conquer worlds together and learn much from each other, it’s all about balance.

Aquarius Female and Leo Male

Here we truly have polar opposites, but opposites create and encourage balance. He is strong where she is weak. She is clear-sighted when his vision blurs. They will encourage each other to reach their goals and feed each other’s ambitions. These two truly have the energy to become a real “power couple”.

Aquarius Male and Virgo Female

This pairing is one of those that is “all or nothing”. The Mercurial intellect of the Virgo Woman will be extremely appealing to the Aquarian Male, creating fertile ground for clear and productive communication. The Virgo Female may be a little too “earth-bound” for the Aquarius Male’s imaginative wanderings unless other aspects are positive.

Aquarius Female and Virgo Male

She may find him too rigid. He may find her to flighty. Communication can be excellent between these two, but often times they take opposing points of view and expend all of their energy trying to convince each other to switch sides, so to speak. Without other positive aspects in the charts, this is a difficult pairing.

Aquarius Male and Libra Female

This is a very promising combination. The Libra Woman’s need to weigh things out and consider situations from all angles is a wonderful sounding board for all of the imaginative Aquarian Male’s ideas and personal philosophies. There exists a strong chemical attraction between these two that can actually make the independent Aquarian want to settle down and enjoy the beauty of life with his beautiful Libran Woman.

Aquarius Female and Libra Male

This pairing is a set up for best friends and life partners if ever there was one. The Libra Male is perfectly capable of enduring the Aquarian Females need to wander and explore many different facets of life without becoming insecure or controlling. The independent Aquarian Woman appreciates this and is more than happy to invite him along on her journey and share all that life has to offer with him.

Aquarius Male and Scorpio Female

Although traditionally astrologers state that this is a difficult pairing, in my experience and observations I find this to be quite the opposite. The Aquarian Male is not usually thought of as a very sexual sign, but when paired with a Scorpio Woman this changes into heat and intensity. Sexual experimentation and a drive to please each other physically can create a strong chemical bond between these two that is nearly unbreakable.

Aquarius Female and Scorpio Male

Tradition may state that this is not a grand pairing, but the inventiveness and imagination of the Aquarian Woman will keep the Scorpio Male more fascinated and intrigued than with any other woman in the zodiac. The Scorpion feels that each time he takes her into his arms he is holding a different woman because she uses that imagination to keep that spark eternally burning. This is a very sexually charged pairing.

Aquarius Male and Sagittarius Female

This is truly a fun couple! They can be open and honest and free with each other. Neither the Aquarian Male nor the Sagittarian Female has much use for conventional relationships and love freedom while they value honesty. This couple is quite capable of loving each other and the world outside simultaneously without experiencing difficulties with security, trust or possessiveness. Talk about fun! These two know how to have it!

Aquarius Female and Sagittarius Male

Travel around the world and then back again along the way all the while sharing secrets and opening their hearts to each other is what these two will do given the opportunity. Bluntly honest to a fault between the two of them, yet ever trusting and loving. These two will move through life having the grandest of times and even when outwardly appearing “settled” they will always roam together in their minds.

Aquarius Male and Capricorn Female

The Aquarian Male appreciates the Capricorn Females hard work and stabilizing force in his life. The Capricorn Female can keep the Aquarian Male firmly planted on planet earth while he travels astrally and she supports his idealism, perhaps even envies it, but she will keep doing everything that she can to contribute to dreams and visions. The Capricorn Female can motivate the Aquarian Male into being just a bit more down to earth in nature without creating any resentment or discord.

Aquarius Female and Capricorn Male

The Aquarian Female will feel like the Capricorn Male is trying to be her father figure, and just as she did with her biological father, she will rebel against him. Although if other aspects in the charts are positive, the Capricorn Male may be able to lighten up as needed and just keep her stable, if they are not in existence the Aquarian Female will just disappear into another universe when he becomes too overbearing.

Aquarius Male and Aquarius Female

These two can be best friends, lovers, exes that get along and just about anything else you can imagine when it comes to relationships. Both are flighty and need space, their relationships are likely to provide plenty of freedom, so much so that they both may find each other with different partners without even realizing it if they don’t pay attention, but there will never be any resentment or long-term anger if that happens as they truly know how to be “friends for life”.

Aquarius Male and Pisces Female

The Aquarian Male loves the fact that the Pisces Female can dream right along beside him and add to those dreams in her own sensitive and intuitive way. He doesn't feel the need for independence as strongly with this sign as he does with the others, as she and her dreamy ways bring him a sense of inner peace. Someone has to remember to go to the grocery store here or you two might just dream away!!! Wake up!!!

Aquarius Female and Pisces Male

The Aquarian Female will feel like the Pisces Male is a bit over-sensitive at times, and despite her own active imagination, she will want him to take his head out of the clouds and put those dreams to work! If well aspected, she can be the "driver" in the relationship making for a great pair, but if other aspects do not encourage this, the Aquarian Female will move on to a more productive partner.

Around the Wheel with Aries

Around the Wheel with Pisces

Want To Seduce a Pisces?

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Brigid Bishop’s Valentine’s Day Gift Giving Guide to the Zodiac

 

When we give gifts, we usually try to present the recipient with a present that we, ourselves, would appreciate.  The key to being a great “presenter” is to give a gift that will appeal to the recipients’ personality and psychological expectations and pleasure centers.

When giving a gift to a lover this Valentine’s Day, if you know what sign their Venus resides in, you should try to provide a gift relative to that sign.  If you only know your love’s Sun Sign, then use that for a guide.

Aries

New and shiny and sparkly, reflective, items that look new and reflect back to them!  Glass, diamonds, mirrors, etc. are materials that appeal to them.  Items that are personalized are very pleasant to them.  Red, black and white are their preferred color schemes.  Metallic wrapping paper is always a good idea.

Taurus

High quality is more important here than quantity.  Textures are very important, clothing must feel good against their skin, soft and silky, pleasing to touch.  Tickets to a show are not a good idea as Taureans would rather have an item they can hold onto than an experience to remember, but a gourmet meal at the finest restaurant in the city will work wonders.  Flowers make them cry and will be pressed in a special book and saved forever.  Colors are pastels and blue.

Gemini

Wrapping won’t matter here, it may not even be noticed!  Greens and yellows are there favorite colors and since the entire world around them fascinates them, you can go in just about any gift direction you choose!  A collection of little assorted and varied gifts is always a hit, the grab bag effect extends their pleasure.  Joke gifts are well received by this sign.  Books, books and more books, movies are a popular choice too!  Or, the book AND the movie too!

Cancer

Sentimentality at its’ most profound here.  Flowery wrapping paper, mushy cards that expound the depths of your feelings for them will be treasured forever.  Soft gifts (to the touch) are very pleasing.  A comfy, cozy blanket or shirt, warm socks or booties, something that says it will take care of them works wonders.  A gift that contains sentimental value to YOU will have them choking up instantaneously, like your favorite childhood stuffed animal.  Cancer colors are earth tones.

Leo

Do it big!  Even if a tiny present, put it in a big box with a giant bow!  They love to be the center of attention so send that singing telegram or the room full of balloons to their office.  Make sure it arrives when everyone is around to see how loved they are!  Flaming red, blazing orange and dead black are colors that will appeal to them.

Virgo

Think practical.  This is what they will appreciate more than anything.  Something that is useful in everyday life will tickle their fancy quite nicely.  Make it natural, all natural fibers in their clothing, hand woven baskets or gifts from the health food store.  Colors are brown, cream, wheat and khaki, humble says it best.

Libra

Cards, cards, cards, many of them to tell them how many different ways you love them!  Romance!!!  Flowers and jewelry are their favorites.  Scented candles, poems, romance, romance, romance!  Pastels, pinks, mauves, blues, reds are their colors.

Scorpio

Sexy.  Colors are black and blue.  The negligee’, the male version of said negligee’, a favorite perfume or aftershave will appeal.  Decadent.  Chocolate.  Think sensual.

Sagittarius

Anything about horses, the book "How to Live Like a Horse" would be an excellent choice here.  Anything fun!  A fun time, tickets to the circus, lottery tickets, sporting equipment, items to use when traveling, baggy sweaters, take them to a fun party.  Colors are purple, royal blue and white.

Capricorn

No matter what it is, make sure it is the BEST of it’s like.  Books on how to better oneself, how to get ahead, biographies of the ultra-successful, anything that reeks of success will appeal to them.  Green, black and silver are their colors.  Items that they can use at work are always popular with them, anything to help them stay organized will be appreciated.

Aquarius

Any Aquarian you know will have some type of current passion, find out what it is, and gift accordingly.  Since these passions may change hourly, make sure you wait until right before the holiday to shop for it.  Electronic gadgets, puzzles, brain teasers, unusual and hard to find objects, either ultra modern or ancient in nature will all have appeal.  Velcro and zippers turn them on.  Colors are white, electric blue, yellow and green, and oh, they LOVE stripes!

Pisces

Appeal to their imaginations, put a little magic into their gift.  Velvety soft clothing, velvety soft foods, velvety soft wrapping paper and cards will do well.  Poetry, mystical books, a psychic reading, an astrology chart will also make them happy.  The colors on a peacock feather on the colors for Pisces, and purple.  They also tend to like coconuts for some odd reason. 

 

 

Published Friday, February 08, 2008 4:10 PM by Brigid Bishop

When You Fall In Love With a Married Man

It isn't ever planned or well thought out, but women can and do fall in love with married men on a fairly regular basis. It is by no means an easy situation, and like it or not, someone is going to get hurt, that's just par for the course.

Do women go out with the intent to find themselves a married person to fall in love with? Of course not. Attraction, destiny, soul mate connections, current life circumstances, physical attraction, discontent with current relationship, they are all ingredients in the recipe for an affair.

Being the other woman requires you to take a step back and take a cold, hard, analytical look at the realities of your situation. There will be serious limitations and you should consider them thoroughly before embarking on an affair or continuing your affair with a married man.

It is entirely possible that someday he may leave his wife, however, you live in the present, not the future, and you have no guarantees that his marriage will end.

What you can expect when engaged in this type of relationships are a lot of spontaneous changes in your ability to see each other. Expect last minute rendezvous at the drop of a hat, but also expect that even your best laid plans are subject to last minute cancellations.

Expect to be spending all major holidays alone. He will be in the company of his family, which does include his wife and not with you. Unless you are well socialized, you can expect to be very lonely during these times.

You will need to keep your relationship discreet. You will be unable to share details of your relationship with friends and family as you would in a normal relationship. This can begin to have an isolating effect on you. You will never get to know his parents, his siblings, his children or his circle of friends unless he gets a divorce in the future, which again, is not where you are now. That part of his life will be compartmentalized away from you, where it is entirely possible that he is fully integrated into your life, creating a major imbalance.

You will truly be living in the shadow of his life.

The married male who is seeking companionship outside of his primary relationship, (his marriage), may be a male who has absolutely no intention of divorcing his wife. It is possible that he does project himself into a divorce, however, he may have reasons that lead him to believe that the timing of a divorce is just not right for him at present.

The question you must ask yourself is, what kind of a relationship to you really want?

Has he ever stated to you that he is getting divorced? How much time are you willing to invest in waiting to see if he will end his marriage and move forward into a relationship with you? You need to be realistic, these situations can and do drag on for years. Set a time limit in your mind as to how long you are willing to wait on the sidelines keeping your own life on hold and stick to it.

Do you want a relationship that you don't have to hide? Do you want to be able to go out in public together without fear of discovery? Do you want to be able to introduce your partner to your friends and family and spend holidays and special occasions together? If these are things necessary to your happiness, you must take them into account when deciding whether to continue your affair or not.

Are you realistic in your expectations of how his current wife and any children he may have would react were your affair to be discovered? It is highly likely to be very unpleasant.

If you feel that you just cannot let go of your married partner and are willing to suffer through this uncomfortable situation, there are ways for you to cope.

Try to regain some balance in this totally unbalanced situation. Don't be ready to see him each and every time he can slip away because he suddenly is available unexpectedly. Although you may be tempted to take advantage of sharing that special, limited time with him, you will not allow this to occur as it shows him that he is your number one priority, although you are not his primary concern.

Never forget that these types of relationship contain high levels of romance and drama just by their very nature, whether real or imagined, this is so. Grand gestures and excessive professions of love are not unusual in these affairs. Why? Because he well knows that you are in a precarious position by being involved in him and he has to make it seem worth your while. Don't take everything he says at face value. Married men who have girlfriends lie. This is a cold hard fact. There is no way for him to maintain two honest and open relationships in this situation (unless he is part of an open marriage agreement, which is rare). If he is lying to his spouse, do not think for even one second that he is not lying to you as well.

The biggest and most common lie that married men who cheat utilize is that they no longer are sexually active with their wives. Many will even claim to have separate sleeping quarters, Don't believe that lie even for one fleeting second. If he is still married to her and they are still living under the same roof and she has no idea that your relationship exists, he is still sleeping in the same bed with her.

With that in mind, the biggest mistake a woman in this position makes is being exclusive to the married male in question. Until he files for divorce, a woman in this predicament would be wise to continue to date single and available men concurrently. The best remedy is to walk away from the married man and tell him to look you up after his divorce, but if you simply can't, don't limit yourself to being his woman on the side, continue to investigate other relationship options. If you can't bring yourself to do so, you are going to be very lonely at times.

Exercise caution in sharing information about your affair. People love scandal and gossip, and a secret is only a secret when only one person knows about it. Many, even close friends, will judge you harshly for dating a married man, so be extremely cautious about whom you discuss your situation with.

Set a definitive time limit for your affair.

Unless you want to spend decades as the other woman, as Katherine Hepburn did, only to have the married man you love die married to his wife, bring up the discussion of divorce early on in your affair.

If he does not give you an explicit time frame, you should leave him, this indicates he truly has no intention of divorcing.

If he informs you that he is waiting for his children to finish high school, seriously consider their current ages, if they are still very young, walk away. If you were to continue your involvement with him throughout their primary, middle school and high school education, what motivation would he have to leave his marriage if you were still with him?

In all of this, you must also ponder how he speaks of his current wife.

Are his references to her respectful and honest and definitive of why he no longer feels he wants to be married to her? If this is the case, he respects women and is probably being honest about how the marriage went wrong.

If, on the other hand, he runs her down and blames the failure of the marriage solely on her you need to be extremely careful. This may make you temporarily feel secure because it convinces you that he is no longer in love with his wife, but, consider that someday you may be in her shoes and would you like to hear him speak of you in that manner?

Remember, these relationships are full of drama and deception, he has to keep you feeling like your stifled relationship is worth it, and he will lie to do so.

It is a volatile and potentially painful situation you are in. You could very likely have your heart broken. He may stay married permanently. It does happen. Remember Katherine Hepburn. You could potentially spend years in the shadows of his life loving him and hoping for change only to find, in the end, all of your love was in vain.

It is best to avoid the situation altogether if possible, but if you find yourself in this predicament, you are not alone. There are situations like these that do work out, contrary to popular conjecture, each situation is unique, but you must assess the emotional risks you are undertaking and be realistic about them if at all possible.

Soul Mates

by Brigid Bishop


Searching for your soul mate?  Have a romanticized vision in your head of what it will be like?  Living happily ever after and never having a harsh word pass between you?  Is this what you have come to believe your soul mate is all about?

WRONG!

Soul mate relationships, although the most SIGNIFICANT relationships in our lives, are also the most DIFFICULT, or CHALLENGING, or CONTAIN THE MOST OBSTACLES!

People look at me like I am nuts when I say this as they have been led to believe by modern marketing practices that soul mate relationships are an instant connection with the fairy tale ending guaranteed, oh lord, do we need to talk about this!

First of all, there is a common misconception that people have that each soul here on earth has but one soul mate.  That is not true.  We have multiple soul mates.  Each soul mate that we encounter is here with us because we have created a specific kind of karma with that soul.  Dependent upon the karma created......we teach each others lessons relevant to that karma.

There are also different types of soul mates.  Some soul mates are considered "twin flames".  Twin flames are typically souls that are on a very similar karmic path and we encounter them during certain growth stages of our lives, we support them, they support us.  They are typically friends, family members, or sometimes even casual acquaintances that we feel that instant chemistry with.  They are not here so much to teach us a soul lesson as to support us while we learn it.  They can manifest as children and parents, etc. etc.

There are also "twin souls".  Twin souls tend to have extremely similar life paths to ours and we tend to cultivate these relationships quite easily, the twin soul is probably the type of soul mate that the average person imagines when they reference the term.  The compatibility quotient is high, interests similar, experiences similar, etc., they typically are not the type of soul mate that passionate relationships arise out of.

Then we have the pure essence soul mates.  These are the soul mates that have been romanticized in literature etc., however, the relationships with these soul mates are NEVER easy, smooth or effortless, they can be quite painful in fact, but if we work out the lessons karmically imprinted on our souls together, we achieve the reward of being able to be happy together.

The best example of a soul mate relationship portrayed in modern media that I can think of right now is the movie "What Dreams May Come".  If you have never seen it, please rent it and pay close attention.  Robin Williams plays the male lead and I can never remember the woman's name, but this is a soul mate relationship.  In this story the man and woman meet and are very happy and productive, soul mates, but then, the soul lessons begin.

 

WARNING:  THIS IS A DESCRIPTION OF THE MOVIE, A "SPOILER" TO DEMONSTRATE A SOULMATE RELATIONSHIP, DO NOT READ FURTHER IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO SPOIL THE MOVIE FOR YOURSELF!!

 

I warned you!  This is the spoiler.  Robin Williams and his wife are happily married with children and very successful and productive.  Everything you could imagine a soul mate relationship being based on popular belief (fairy tale life), and then......one day......their nanny takes the children in the car and there is a terrible accident.  Yes, the children die.  It's horrid.

The wife falls apart and so does the husband, but the husband is capable of healing and begins to do so, the wife continues to fall apart as does the marriage, the wife even becomes suicidal, but their soul mate connection allows the husband to somehow pull her back into the living of life......just as they are about to celebrate reconciling their marriage and her recovery from attempted suicide, HE gets killed!!!!

It's so sad!!!!  He dies and the story follows him to "heaven" where he encounters certain characters..........and he is allowed to see how his estranged wife is doing.  Needless to say, she becomes depressed and suicidal and to his dismay he cannot stop her this time and she kills herself.

Well, they are soul mates, the most difficult relationships to work on, but the most connective.  He finds that she goes to hell because of her suicide, and he is successful in rescuing her from the depths of hell...........it is an excellent movie about what it means to be a soul mate and what true love is.

The movie ends with a little boy and a little girl on a dock by a lake playing who meet for the first time, yes, it is Robin and his wife again, getting yet another chance to get things right, that is the nature of a soul mate relationship.  You go through hell together and you keep getting the chance to do it over and over and over and over until you get it right.

Soul mates..........ah, the irony.  I have mine and I must tell you I spent my time in hell and he did come and pull me back out.  We went through nine years of working out our karma until we were allowed to be happy (I hope it lasts).

So when someone asks me "Is he my soul mate?" in a reading, the first thing I tell them is "You realize we have more than one soul mate, right?".

Careful what you ask for, you just might get it.


Copyright © 2007 Brigid Bishop

This content may not be copied or reproduced in any way without the express written permission of the author.  You are welcome to link to or bookmark this page, but please contact the author via Keen Mail if you wish to reproduce this article in whole or in part.

*Have you read Brigid's new book "The Dating Game" available on Amazon and Kindle!


Please Arrange a Call or Try My Groups TY!

Read more about Soul Mates on Brigid Bishops' Blog at Keen.com

Gone With the Wind, a Classic Soul Mate Story

 

On The Outside Looking In

The Dating Game: Are You a Masculine or Feminine Energy Female?

Explore Your Natural Tendencies.

Ok, this one is for the girls, women, divas, ladies out there.........especially those who are experiencing "Relationship Issues" and looking for some insight into what is causing these issues to arise.  This should prove useful to the men among our readership as well, as the male can be either a masculine or feminine Primary Energy as well, so I guess this is for just about anyone examining their relationship!

In all relationships there needs to be balance.  In all relationships there are multiple energies flowing.  One of the core energies in any romantic relationship is the anima/animus, the yin and yang, the masculine and feminine energies.

How do you know which energy is your Primary Energy?

First, let us examine what you want and expect from a relationship.

Do you want to feel a sense of  your partner being on your side, a sense of inclusiveness, a sense of protection, a sense of your feelings being recognized and validated?  Do you want to express yourself in terms of how you feel?  Is it important to you that your feelings are being considered?  Do you tend to look at things in terms of what you "Don't Want" instead of what you "Want".

This is a very simplistic boil down to a feminine energy being.

If, on the other hand you wish primarily for your partner to respect you, leave everything up to you, if you wish to have control over your relationship, the pace it grows at, the things that you do as a couple, the social circle you frequent, and more than anything you want your partner to look at you as a competent individual and you feel it is of primary importance that your partner respects your thoughts on any given subject and trusts you to make the right choices and you look at life in terms of what you "Want" rather than what you "Don't Want", then your primary energy is that of a male energy being.

Everyone is a mixture of both.

Which are you letting show to your partner or your current interest?

At the beginning of any relationship you are defining your primary energy and you are setting the tone for the life of the relationship.

If you are a Feminine Female then you want your partner to consider your feelings, so you must express yourself in terms of "I feel" and "I don't want....".  The feminine energy, like the Suit of Cups in Tarot is Passive and Receptive which means, if you want your feelings validated and considered you need to take a passive and receptive approach to your relationship.  Being a Feminine Female makes a Masculine Energy Male the correct "type" for you.  This is the man who wants to be respected and trusted and wants you to think him capable and competent.

For instance, if it is the beginning of getting to know a guy and he fails to call you within what you think is a comfortable amount of time you DO NOT pick up the phone and call or text him (or email him).  You wait it out.  It is uncomfortable, but that is what you do.  When the gentleman does call, your proper response as the feminine energy is something like this, "Oh, hi, I was feeling kind of disappointed when you didn't call me, I don't want to be assuming we connected if we didn't.  I'm glad to hear from you.  What's up?"  Your role in assuming your feminine energy role is to simply and passively reject or accept his behaviour.  Nothing more, nothing less.  By expressing how you feel you are putting your femininity out there for him to nurture.

This notifies the male that your feelings are important to you and his behaviour caused you to feel a little insecure, and a masculine energy male will "step up" and validate those feelings for you, without you doing a thing more.  He now knows what you don't want, and will try his best not to disappoint you again in order to gain your trust.

Now, if you are a Masculine Female and you find yourself on the waiting end of a telephone line, it is an entirely different scenario.  First of all, your match is a Feminine Energy Male.  These males tend to be the dreamy, creative type, not the traditional male.  They frequently are artists, writers, carpenters, creators in some way.  The Masculine Female wants her thoughts and opinions considered first, before her feelings, she is a "take-charge" kind of girl.  She knows what she wants and she goes after it.  The Feminine Male is the passive one.  He wants his feelings validated.  Although outwardly, he may be very masculine in appearance, his Primary Energy is feminine, which means, the woman is the one actively "in charge" of the relationship.

In this case, the woman should pick up the phone and give him a ring and invite him out, something like this, "I think we really should get together soon.  How's Friday night for wings for you?".  It's role reversal and it will work for the energies if you are both in your Natural Primary Energy roles.

Ok, so now you know you want to be the feminine energy, you feel it, and you believe that the man you are interested in is a masculine energy male.  You've started out okay, but now he is not initiating.  What do you do?

Nothing.

Sorry girls, but the moment you pick up that phone and call that masculine energy guy you are delaying any kind of commitment or progress by months, possibly years.

The conundrum you inadvertently create is that now you have two masculine energies interacting, you have "effeminized" yourself.  Now that man you are interested in thinks that your feelings do not need to be validated.  You are now "one of the guys" and fair game to ignore your feelings and not cherish them.  Is this what you want?  If you are truly a feminine energy woman, NO, you do not.

I don't know if this makes any sense to you at all, but it boils down to the very arcane (yet true) fact that men are hunters.  If they don't need to pursue you, they will simply take it for granted that you will be available to them whenever they are in the mood for your company.  They will not nurture the connection along, so ladies, PATIENCE is a virtue afterall!

If you are unsure of which energy role you have assumed or if you feel that you may have "messed up" a bit, give me a call and we can take a look at where your situation is at and I can assist you in getting it "back on track".

 

More on this, and the different ways masculine and feminine energies communicate and view sex and life in general in the next installment of "The Dating Game".

Brigid Bishop

Copyright © 2007 Brigid Bishop

This content may not be copied or reproduced in any way without the express written permission of the author.  You are welcome to link to or bookmark this page, but please contact the author via Keen Mail if you wish to reproduce this article in whole or in part.



 

For Further Insight, Read "See Dick Run"

 

Published Monday, April 02, 2007 10:51 PM by Brigid Bishop Edit
Filed Under: Brigid Bishop, Relationship Coach | Report this
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Ok, this one is for the girls, women, divas, ladies out there.........especially those who are experiencing "Relationship Issues" and looking for some insight into what is causing these issues to arise.  This should prove useful to the men among our readership as well, as the male can be either a masculine or feminine Primary Energy as well, so I guess this is for just about anyone examining their relationship!

In all relationships there needs to be balance.  In all relationships there are multiple energies flowing.  One of the core energies in any romantic relationship is the anima/animus, the yin and yang, the masculine and feminine energies.

How do you know which energy is your Primary Energy?

First, let us examine what you want and expect from a relationship.

Do you want to feel a sense of  your partner being on your side, a sense of inclusiveness, a sense of protection, a sense of your feelings being recognized and validated?

In order to prevent copyright infringement, this blog has been condensed to an excerpt as it currently appears in Brigid's book "The Dating Game, Insights Into Affairs of The Heart" releasing in April 2010 and available at Amazon and fine book sellers everywhere.  Ask for it by name!

Copyright © 2007 Brigid Bishop

Revision One © July 2009

This content may not be copied or reproduced in any way without the express written permission of the author. You are welcome to link to or bookmark this page, but please contact Brigid Bishop via Keen Mail if you wish to reproduce this article in whole or in part.


For further insight, Read "See Dick Run"

I compiled 13 effective spells for the 21st Century to encourage communication, draw love, bind negativity and more!  I have released them in a little book effective today.  If you are interested in performing spellwork, these rituals will come in quite handy. Includes instructions for working with the phases of the Moon.  Available at fine booksellers everywhere.  Releasing on Kindle as well!

Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?

 

Many clients call and have concerns because their relationships are not “perfect”, and some may be striving for the “next level” and frustrated with what they perceive as a lack of progress. 

Perhaps they have been dating the same gentleman for 2 years and he has not yet proposed, or perhaps they are living together and he has not yet asked for marriage, or perhaps they are casually dating and he has not yet asked to be “exclusive” or defined the relationship at a level they are satisfied with, i.e. significant other.

Well, let me start by telling you that as an Advisor here on Keen.com, it would be totally unethical and unprofessional for me to tell you WHAT to do.  The best counsel I can offer you is what you can expect given your current path and what changes you would need to make if you are dissatisfied with the outcome.  The rest is up to you, your free will will define the course as you move forward.  If you like the outcome, of course, you are going to stay on that same path working toward that goal.  If you do not like the outcome, we can look at what (if anything) you can do to change that particular outcome……and work from there.

One of the primary reasons that progress slows in relationships prior to establishing the “next level” of commitment, no matter what step of the relationship ladder you are on, is the imbalance of masculine and feminine energies within a pairing.  Please read my blogs on the subject matter for further information.  Click here for some insight into the masculine and feminine energie of your situation:  Are You a Masculine or Feminine Energy Person?

In order to prevent copyright infringement, this blog has been condensed to an excerpt as it currently appears in Brigid's book "The Dating Game, Insights Into Affairs of The Heart" releasing in April 2010 and available at Amazon and fine book sellers everywhere.  Ask for it by name!

 

Copyright © 2007 Brigid Bishop

This content may not be copied or reproduced in any way without the express written permission of the author.  You are welcome to link to or bookmark this page, but please contact the author via Keen Mail if you wish to reproduce this article in whole or in part. 

 

Visit Brigid Bishop

I've just returned to Keen full-time after nearly a three year absence.  I had to leave for a while after my son, Zachary, was murdered.  I am glad that I am finally able to be back, and I thank all my loyal clients for calling and chatting with me.  And I also thank all of the NEW clients who have contacted me recently, you are all wonderful people!

I would like to know what you are interested in seeing me write about.  I've been re-posting excerpts from my book "The Dating Game".  Would you like to have me write more about Tarot?  I can post excerpts from my book "Uncloaking the Tarot".

I am here to service clients of Keen and would like your feedback on what you would like to see me blog about.  Please comment with suggestions of topics, and I will do my best to accommodate the wants and needs of my audience.


Brightest Blessings!

Brigid Bishop

A perfectly valid question to ask a Relationship Coach.  A frequent question that a Professional Tarot Reader hears. 

When will he say he loves you?

This is a very valid question to ask if you are within the scope of the first three to six months of a relationship.  Many people are wise enough to take the time to wait and see how their relationships develop before blurting out those three big words.  In fact, if someone blurts them out any sooner than that, it may well be in just a spur of the moment fashion, pertaining more to infatuation or the intensity and passion of a new love affair, rather than a true verbalization of emotion.

It also depends upon your level of emotional maturity.  Of course, if you are a teenager, three to six months can be an eternity as few relationships at that age have any real longevity, but if you are a mature adult and you really are concerned with your partner telling you he loves you, take this factors into consideration.

1) The length of your relationship. 

As stated, the length of your relationship is the first point to consider.  If it is less than three months old, are you sure that you are feeling love yourself or is it the blush of a new affair?  Take your time and slow down.  Don’t worry if he loves you, focus on how you feel about him!

2)  If you have been involved for more than a three month period consider whether your partner is attentive and consistent.

If you can count on your partner to be consistent in communication with you, if you are dating on a steady basis, meeting each other’s friends and families and generally sharing your lives with each other, you may be at the point when this love will be expressed.  It is likely to happen during this time frame for most couples who continue to develop to a deeper level of commitment.

If your partner, on the other hand, is sporadic or inconsistent with you, if you find yourself being in an “on and off” state, or if you just see each other every once in a while it is not likely that you are going to hear those words any time soon.

3)  If you have been seeing each other for more than six months and he hasn’t said it yet….

If he is consistent and attentive, he should definitely be expressing this sentiment by the nine month point.  If not, you may be in a dead-end relationship. 

How can you tell?

He is sporadic with time and communication.  You can’t count on him to know that you will be spending time together, you are always worried whether or not he’s going to call to make plans with you.  He is socializing regularly without you, with other friends, or may still be dating other people openly (or discreetly).

If this is the case after a nine month acquaintance, this is just a casual dating situation and if you are looking for “true love”, you aren’t going to find it here!

4)  If you have been dating for longer than nine months and he still hasn’t said it…..

Then he may have a warm and affectionate feeling for you, but the man doesn’t love you.  If you have to ask someone else, when someone you’ve been dating for nearly a year or LONGER is going to verbalize love for you, he isn’t going to say it.  He may hold you in high regard, he may care for you, he may have plenty of affectionate feelings for you, but does he “love” you?  No.

If a man cannot tell you that he loves you by the end of the first year of dating or beyond, then he is not viewing you as a life partner, he is viewing you as a pal.  Someone to take out, be physical with, enjoy spending time with, a companion, but not a life partner that he loves and wants to commit to.

Odds are if you are dating for more than a year and he hasn’t said he loves you that he is still shopping around and you are the one that “will do” until true love comes around.  Instead of trying to MAKE the man fall in love with you, which is utterly IMPOSSIBLE, your best bet is to let go, move on, and find someone who will appreciate and love you.

I know this sounds harsh, but after ten years of coaching women through relationship issues, I have found that the women who are brave enough to let go and move on are the women who find the love and the partner that they desire.  Those that hang in there and try to force the relationship to develop, or think that by staying they will make it happen, frequently find that they have wasted months, possibly even years, on a dead end relationship.

Where do you want to be a year from now?  If you are comfortable with a long term dating situation, then that’s great!  However, if you do want to be loved and cared for and become a true life partner to a man who is sincere, don’t waste more than nine months waiting for a man to express his affections.

If you leave, yes it may hurt, but you are then free to find someone who truly DOES care.  The upside is, if he really DOES love you and was just having trouble expressing it, he won’t let you go for long.


To gain more insight into making your relationships work for you, purchase a copy of Brigid Bishop’s The Dating Game, Insights Into Affairs of the Heart, available on Amazon and Kindle.


Want to learn to read Tarot for yourself, friends and family, maybe even Professionally?  Pick up a copy of Brigid Bishop's Book and Workbook set Uncloaking the Tarot, available on Amazon and at fine booksellers everywhere!!!

Wondering if the gentleman that you are interested in developing a relationship with is sincere about wanting to get to know you?  Is he just interested in you in a "casual" way?  There are several key indicators of what a man's intentions are toward you that are easy enough to spot.

Understanding the short-term and long-term relationship strategies that men implement is an easy way to know whether your new interest is "worth the wait".  Applying this knowledge to your personal relationships is not a difficult task, it just takes a little critical thinking.

First of all, you have to understand what attracts men.  Looks.  Yes, men are shallow beings.  Attractiveness is measured psychologically by a person's symmetry.  If you are a pleasant looking individual, who has a face that is well-balanced, clear skin, and a decent appearance to your hair, you are probably considered reasonably attractive.  Body shape needs to lend itself to a "fertile" appearance.  A well-defined waist line, not anorexic, but a slimmer waist, with hips a bit broader, and a defined bosom are considered signs of fertility.  Well proportioned, balanced, symmetry again.

If a man is interested in a long-term relationship, he will pursue a woman who has symmetry, appears "fertile" (even if beyond child-bearing years), and has a relatively healthy appearance. 

If a man is only looking for short-term connection (casual sex), he will not really put a high value on the female's appearance, as he does not value her as a potential permanent partner.  So check out the quantity and quality of his short-term partners if you can.

Age does matter.  Men are drawn to fertility (yes, even if you are beyond child-bearing years).  Rarely does a younger male seek the companionship of a significantly older female.  Generally males pursue females who are an average of 3 to 5 years younger than themselves for long-term relationship formation, although this is the average, the older a male becomes, the larger the age gap.  If you are older than him, the odds that he is looking to you to form a long-term relationship go down, exponentially with each year that you are elder to him.  If you are 5 or more years older than him, unless you are extremely wealthy, or have some other type of material security to offer him, he is just looking for a casual, short-term experience with you.

Cougars are a myth.  They exist only in Hollywood and on TV shows, and remember, a real cougar is only using the younger man for HER pleasure, not building a "relationship".  So be realistic.  You may have a fun time with "Mr. I am 8 Years Older than Him", but that's all it is likely to become, don't expect a lot.  There are exceptions to every rule, but you would save yourself a lot of heartache if you learned to realize these relationships seldom develop and behave accordingly.

So, men are looking for symmetry, youth, and fertility for long-term relationship building.  What are they looking for in the short-term?  Anything goes.  In the short-term, men are unconcerned with symmetry, they may only be with you one time.  They have no concern about your age, you can be a suitable sexual partner regardless of being his senior, and perhaps an enjoyable one at that, until he finds someone he has a more committed interest in.  Body shape?  Short-term, men are usually unconcerned with whether you are too thin, too heavy, or perfectly symmetrical, they have no intention of sticking around once they have had enough pleasure from you.

A key indicator is also how your appearance matches up to his.  Tens attract tens, nines attract nines, and fives attract fives.  If you have a realistic self-awareness of your attractiveness level, and you believe yourself to be a six, and a gentlemen who is a nine begins showing an interest in you, be careful...he is probably only looking for a short-term connection (unless he views you as a 9 or 10).  Saying "you're hot" to you does not mean that he believes you are superior in attractiveness, it just means that he wouldn't kick you out of bed, not until he was done, anyhow. 

So, if you are looking for a long-term partner, keep in mind that he should be someone who is similar to you in level of attractiveness, age appropriate (+/- 5 Years is a stretch, usually plus 3 to 5 (or more if you are older), and -3 for the reach toward the youthful men), and shows a consistent interest in you.

What do I mean by consistent?

Regular, intentional interest and communication initiated by him, toward you.  If he only approaches you at the bar, at midnight, on Friday night, and you don't hear from him all week, that's not consistent.  If he likes your facebook posts, but never calls you to chat or asks you out, that's not consistency.  If you only see him at a class you both happen to enjoy, that is not consistent.  Direct and personal contact indicates interest.

Don't invest your time, or your heart, until he has built consistency.

Evolutionary Psychology teaches us these facts, and these facts are scientifically valid.  Evolutionary Psychology also states that men will wait to become physically intimate with a mate that they perceive as having long-term potential, but with short-term partners, they will want physical intimacy quickly, and very quickly find another short-term, once they are satisfied.

So, pay attention to the "Science" in love.  Take your time, let the male pursue, and do not become intimate until you feel he has a vested interest in you.

 
Independence, Codependence and Interdependence

Where are you at with your relationship style?

Independence?

In “Deep End”-ness

Co “Deep End”-ness

Inter “Deep End”-ness

Picture the realm of relationships as a big swimming pool. You are in the deep end of the pool.

If you are in “independent” mode, you are swimming around all by yourself, doing fine, getting out and diving in off the high dive, unaffected by the other swimmers around you. You are an individual and you are not connecting with others at this time, you are focused on yourself and yourself alone. You may take an occasional date with another swimmer, but you prefer to swim alone most of the time.

If you are in “codependent” mode, well, you won’t go in the water alone. Someone must always be with you. A lifeguard must always be around. When you dive in you immediately swim over to another swimmer and begin to cling on to them, they frequently push you away. You may feel like you are drowning and no one is helping you. The more you try to cling to another swimmer, the more you are pushed away and you thrash around and swallow water and end up hanging on to the side of the pool coughing and crying. It’s not much fun in the pool for you, but you keep trying.

If you are in “interdependent” mode, you have a great time at the relationship pool. You have one special partner that you swim with on a regular basis. You may synchronize your swim into a beautiful dance in the waters of relationship, when you go to the diving board to try a new move, your partner is there in the water below waiting and watching to be sure you are safe, spotting you while you dive, and you do the same for them. When your swim time is over, you are both comfortable going your separate ways as you know that you will meet back at the pool again soon for another dip, and you feel secure about the other person.

I am a firm believer in interdependence. Independence is fine, it is healthy, but in relationships we have to know how to let people in. Independence can become lonely if we refuse to join in the fun going on in the relationship pool, but there are times when we want to be alone, perhaps we are healing over a bad breakup or just not ready because we have other priorities right now, raising children or career, etc., but don’t swim alone for so long that you forget how to connect.

Codependence is a horrible, anxiety ridden state to exist in. We feel like we are nothing unless we can define ourselves by our relationships, behaviors while in codependent mode can escalate to cyber stalking, and worse, physical stalking. We want others in our lives so bad that we drive them away because we don’t have the self-discipline to let our relationships develop naturally. We tend to go through relationships faster and in higher numbers than most. They all seem to start off promising enough, but within a month or two we are back on the side of the pool crying and coughing. If you are in codependent mode, it may be wise for you to try the independent mode for several months to readjust your relationship goggles and your approach to relationships in general. Once we have mastered independence, we have a much higher success rate at moving on to interdependence.

Ah, interdependence, to me, it is the way all healthy relationships should operate. You and your loved one are secure in knowing that you are there for each other, you are capable of being together, happily, and also of pursuing other interests and friendships without fear or insecurity. There is no need to check up on each other or doubt anything because you have established trust, respect and love. To gain interdependence you and your partner must spend the necessary time in the relationship pool, getting to know each other and enjoying each other, but you must also learn to respect each other’s boundaries and to give each other space.

What is your style of swimming in the relationship pool?

Copyright © 2007 Brigid Bishop

This content may not be copied or reproduced in any way without the express written permission of the author. You are welcome to link to or bookmark this page, but please contact the author if you wish to reproduce this article in whole or in part.

HAVE YOU PICKED UP YOUR COPY OF "THE DATING GAME" YET? A must read no matter what your relationship status.

Look for it online and at fine book stores EVERYWHERE! Ask for it by name!

The Dating Game by Brigid Bishop

The Dating Game
Insights Into Affairs of The Heart
Authored by Brigid Bishop


Social networking sites, cell phones, texting, online chat and dating make it easier for us to access each other, but more difficult to form solid emotional bonds.

The 21st Century has life and relationships moving at a pace never before realized in earlier cultures. People are plugged in and connected on a 24/7 basis, yet, many still struggle with establishing healthy relationships.

The Dating Game provides insights into modern relationships and provides the reader with strategies for coping with dating, breaking up, affairs, divorce and codependency issues.

Find dating tips and relationship strategies that will help you build the healthy connections you want and begin making your relationships work for you.

Written with a sense of humor and true understanding of what the single person is facing today.



Copyright © 2010 by Brigid Bishop



I get this over and over and over again in my professional practice. Women, who are otherwise intelligent and logical beings become irrational and unrealistic and anxiety ridden when the object of their affections becomes ambivalent, or worse, uninterested.

I am not talking about those in "long term" relationships. I am talking about those who are truly single and dating who don't want to give a relationship time to grow or develop naturally, or don't allow the male to take the "reins" so to speak, of the masculine energy role (the initiator) and jump the gun in oh so many ways.

The advice that I give over and over and over again, which VERY few follow, is to remove their energy and attention AWAY from the gentleman who is behaving in a distant manner. This means, don't call him up, don't text him, don't stalk him online, don't invite him out..........the female (at the dating stage) must allow the male the time and the "room" to decide whether or not he wants to take this further, which is not on the same schedule as the female.

Females tend to decide very quickly that they want to be involved. They may have just flirted with a gentleman and they will call me and ask "is this the guy that I am going to marry". Although the cards will show if there is a POTENTIAL for a long term relationship, if you have just met a guy this weekend and he hasn't even asked you out yet, this question is based on suppositions galore and it is not likely that you will get a very accurate answer. Tarot Readings are not set in stone. They will tell you what is LIKELY to happen if you remain on the same path, continue with the same types of actions, into the future. Any changes in YOUR behavior change the outcomes of the situation...Tarot Readings are a living, breathing, metaphysical wonder and change as your actions change.

A more apropos question at the first stages of infatuation would be "will he ask me out" and then after a date or so "will we develop a relationship" perhaps after 6-9 months of exclusive dating...."will he consider marrying me".......the questions have to be realistic in comparison to the situation in order to have any sense of accuracy. If you want to be the "feminine" energy in a relationship with a "masculine" male, as archaic as it may sound, you must allow him to set the pace. If it is not in your nature to allow this, then you may be a "masculine" energy female, or if you are truly "feminine" energy, you need to discipline yourself to your natural energy.

All modern women must maintain a masculine energy at work, and our "go get it if you want it" attitude will serve us well in our careers, but NOT in our relationships (unless he is a feminine energy male), but this post is about the majority....we shall discuss the opposing roles later. Ok, so he is a masculine energy male. He wants to be TRUSTED. He wants you to think he is COMPETENT. So why would you pick up the phone and call him and ask him out for the weekend??? It makes him feel like you are taking the lead and that you do not feel he is man enough, or responsible enough to be able to ask YOU out. He may say yes, but you are setting a playing field where you will ultimately lose! Your role, as the feminine energy, is to ACCEPT or REJECT whatever this man presents to you. If he does not call you within a comfortable amount of time, it doesn't mean you call him and take the lead, it means you REJECT his negligence and busy yourself with friends or on other dates with males who respect you enough to follow up with you.

If a male tells you he would rather "be friends", it does not mean that he really down deep wants to be your lover but is afraid of commitment, or was hurt and afraid he will be hurt again. It means he IS NOT interested in being your lover...move on. If he changes his mind, he will be back.

The most effective means of measuring a man's interest is to keep moving on, keep moving forward UNTIL HE ASKS YOU to stop, stay still with him for awhile. Until a man asks you to be exclusive to him DATE YOUR BUTT OFF!!! If you are in a dating slump......keep yourself busy doing the things you’ve always wanted to do....live your life as you imagine in your mind......start living the life you imagine.....on your own!!!! Nothing draws a man out more than the absence of your energy. If you allow him to feel your absence, he will feel the need to connect, and he will INITIATE!!! If you are always there, texting him, phoning him, lurking on line, he has NO MOTIVATION to connect...........you are always available...so there is no sense of urgency for him to get some of your time and attention...he already has it!!!

Copyright © 2007 Brigid Bishop
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