Love & Spiritual Success Haven

Compassion and Loving Psychic and Spiritual Counseling

If you have a man, this is how to keep him.

Author: Jessica Brown

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It's your time to be happy. Get the relationship you want without wasting time.

Author: Jessica Brown

Want to talk to me live? Click CHAT NOW or give me a CALL NOW.

Once you get to your 30's and then 40's you've have experience quite of bit of life. Most of that consist of disappointments and hurt feelings which most tend to hold on to in order to protect themselves from being hurt again. One thing is for sure, if you are trying to keep yourself from being hurt you are blocking your ability to create love and all facets of life. You think you are just keeping yourself from being hurt by a new guy/girl but really you are keeping many blessings from coming your way. This is why as you choose to do better in life were it is financial or spiritual you will also have the ability to experience love between you and a partner whether it is new or an upgrade - it is all connected.


Did I confuse you? Yeah, I do that sometimes. Let me explain it this way. Your heart chakra or heart energy that creates your entire world does not discriminate between you loving your partner or you loving your job. It is all the same. Some guru's suggest that you write down exactly what you desire for this very reason. It sets that energy in a direction and gives you positive focus.

So, let's say you've been hurt bad by your past relationship. I mean it took you years to recover. Then this nice new guy/girl shows up in your life that is kind and they are pretty much everything you have been looking for. But, the first thing that pops up are feelings from the past. An automatic guard system appears and you are seeing things from an old perspective. You are not present. The pain from the past has colored this person as a possible cheater and you think they are doing one thing when in reality they are doing another. Next, you push them away. You see them less or you answer your phone less because having control is more important then getting your heart crushed again. In this scenario, you are also seeking a job because your current job is not paying enough and you are sick of struggling. You can't seem to get any interviews or when you do, they don't call back.

You have blocked ALL aspects of creation through closing out an experience of love. It is also true, that once upon a time you might have begged for this perfect person and now they have showed up in your life.  You are rejecting your request which is a no no in the energy world. You may call it the Universal Law. You are responsible for your energy, feelings, thoughts and actions. By this law if you reject the love that you previously requested it sends a vibration outward like when a pebble hits a pond, it will effect all aspects of your life.  Now, don't feel it will be a curse or you will be in danger. That's not what I'm saying. It will most likely cause goals or anything you pursue to be frustrating, delayed or slow until you open up your heart in every way. 


You have to become unbroken. You HAVE TO release the energy in which you are holding on. It is the only way. Forgiving yourself and then forgiving the other person. The easiest way is to allow yourself to feel what ever pain that pops up within that moment and acknowledge it. For instance, you feel deep sadness. You can say, "I'm very sad right now and that's ok." There is no need to get in the details of it. Just allow yourself to feel it because if you try to "fix" it within that moment, hurry to feel peace or happiness it will just come back to the surface and sometimes at the wrong time.

I had a loving boyfriend that was very sweet, but he liked to joke around a lot. In my past, I experience very abusive boyfriends and family. When he made a joke it hurt me so bad I lashed out at him and went home vowing not to talk to him again. In reality, it had nothing to do with the joke as much as he triggered old wounds. I spent all that time between boyfriends trying to feel better quickly instead of allowing myself to acknowledge the emotions and then release. Sabotaging was my specialty in my day. I was an expert at it until I realized I was responsible for my healing, no one else.


If you have lost your ability to create love get on track with it now. Practice opening up as your write about what it is like to be in love again. If there is pain as you are writing sit in it. Keep doing this over and over until you are able to create an entire love scene.  Feelings are just feelings, they are not reality unless we make it through words or action.  Love your partner with current eyes and feelings. Create from your natural ability as a human to love all things.

Author: Jessica Brown

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I think a good majority of us women kind of get the two confused when it comes to our feelings. We get involved with a guy and feel that what we are experiencing is true love but in fact it is just infatuation or a huge crush at it's finest. What's the difference? Love is a deep connection where it does not focus on control. It exist in a space of freedom, peace and openness. Love is naturally unconditional regardless of flaws and expectation. Where as infatuation can deal only in the physical. It is about how your partner looks, makes you feel and rather or not he is saying the right words or doing the right things. It's very focused on what he can provide and what he will provide for the relationship. You may find yourself in full fantasy mode or being in a dreamy like state as if you were a teenager again drawing hearts around his name. This is ok. But it's not love, yet. It's the beginning or the spark that ignites the love flame. When you know it is just infatuation you can let go when it is not working. Not every man that comes in your life is meant to stay forever. I advise taking notes on what you have learned in light, of course, and take it to the next awesome experience.

Author: Jessica Brown

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Hmm. How can we do better single ladies? Easy. "Be Assertive." Don't be afraid to ask questions. Questions limits guessing.

Author: Jessica Brown

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A little help for you manifesters today. Instead of saying I wish I had or even fantasizing about the greatest love, say, "I already have." and "I am, right now."

Fantasizing is signaling to the Universe that you don't have so it reflects back like a mirror and you will continue to not have. Next, picture yourself already there. What do you feel like? What are you wearing? What are the people around you doing or saying? Notice the difference between fantasy (wanting) and Being (having). This brings confidence, comfort and peace. Try it yourself.

Author: Jessica Brown

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You may have seen several sequences of numbers. 333,222,111 or 211, 411,511,911 or 1111 and think, well that's weird or maybe you are very curious and did research.  There are a lot more different numbers and they may not be attached to double digits or even repetitive ones such as 235 or 813. Because numbers are universal like 01010101 (binary code) in a computer it's easy to communicate and connect to our brain which by the way is a computer within itself.

numerology and numbers

If you are seeing these numbers several times a day or even daily you are receiving and sending massages. I use to think that these numbers were vibrations or energy sent from angles or my Higher Self. But now, I realize after 10 years it is also your vibration communicating. Depending on your consciousness the numbers reflect back what you need or replies to the experiences you are having within a moment. Since we are having a human experience the Universe desires information on the world experiment. It collects different sequences based on what you are ...well experiencing. This is also why there is no such thing as bad or good. It's more like what you desire versus what you don't desire. For instance, you see 11:11 or 1111 - without you knowing it you are constantly vibrating in your energy outward, so the reply is in the numbers.  11:11 can be seen as a you are connected to the whole and you are not alone. Breathe in and breathe out and stay present. It is also telling you, your are doing a good job but keep moving forward.

When I see 444, I'm usually scared and feel alone. 444 is a reminder that my guides and angels are close by. Ask and you shell receive. Knock and a door will open. Self-judgment and doubt is not required. Just as if you are talking to a very dear soul.

I get 333 when I'm angry, frustrated, feel very unfocused and detached from my true self. 333 is a reminder to get back in sync. Let go and allow the Universe, God or Higher-Self do it for you. The most important thing at this moment is peace.

I had an apartment number 222 for 2 years. Yes, exactly. Whoever was in that apartment before me had very high energy that I needed very badly after an abusive relationship. I would sit in it for hours in meditation. 222 means you are learning on a higher level of consciousness then you have before. It's like being promoted from 5th grade to 11th. You can say it is a quantum leap. I love being in this vibration because it also means that you are going in the right direction. There were many times I did not feel like I was on the right track, but this number would pop and I knew even when I was very uncomfortable with the way things were, I was were I was suppose to be.

511 or 555 is reflecting back change. The 511 mean there will be change but for the better. It won't be abrupt or harsh so be open to it. This is sometimes in relationships with family, lover or friend. It can also be work or a living situation. 555 can be abrupt. You might have to deal with a little bit of a storm especially if it shows up by itself over and over. This can be in the form of a disagreement or miscommunication.

711 or 777 appears to me sometimes when I feel like I'm not doing enough. I'm working 60 hours a week and sometimes more. Like, 222, it is saying that you are doing the right thing and you will have the abundance you seek. However, in the case of 777, abundance can come in many forms like a new car, great friends, family reunited a great relationship.

811 or 888 is blasting out abundant waves. You are not only on the right track you will get everything you are asking for. This is typically in all aspects, unlike 777 where it can be just material or just a good relationship. 888 is joyfully letting you know money, love and success is coming. Keep up with you hard work.

911 or 999 is letting you know it is time for the old ways of conscious to leave and a new wave to take it's place. This can cause movement in your life. Sometimes I see 911 and 555 in the same day or week.  Usually, if you are not ready 511 or 555 can be avoided, but if you are seeing 911 it is coming rather you like it or not. It is never bad. It is an upgrade of your life. You might be holding on to something very tightly thus the 911 is letting you know to please release your kung fu grip.

1010 is letting you know you will receive an awakening or an "Aha moment" that will help you on your journey. Be open minded.

1212 is also an awakening but its more of a deeper spiritual nature. I sometime get 1010 and 1212 together. 1212 is letting you know that not only will you be awakening to a higher consciousness, things around you might change for the greater good as well. You might be requested to help someone after reaching this level of vibration that is struggling manifesting what they need.


You are sending and receiving messages constantly. When you are seeing certain set of numbers it is responding back to what you have sent out through your energy.  Energy is connected to feelings, thoughts and behavior. The Universe knows your path as well as knows what you truly desire. It is doing its best to get you where you are asking to be. Pay attention.

Author: Jessica Brown

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Virgo Men Look for in a Woman

Ever wondered what Virgo men find attractive? If you can understand Virgo’s characteristics you will have a lot better chance of getting his attention.


They not your typical guy and will shock you on the type of woman they prefer. Virgo men seeks the prefect mate when it comes to love. On top of that he is consistent with how he goes about finding who he wants to be with and her role in his life. Will it be long-term or just a steamy friendship? Before he gets in any type of affair, he will analyze every detail in his head considering the pros and cons as well as the strengths of an emotional investment. Although not very in tune with the ways of romance, he will schedule his entire life around you and do whatever it takes to be a better man.

Faithful, thoughtful and loves to help in a relationship, the Virgo might prefer the very opposite of his own personality. You have to be willing to allow him to help in any way you can because he thrives on being your hero. Even if you are high maintenance he is not – again opposites attract with him. In bed, he wants a woman that will explore new things as well as satisfy personal favorites. He might play shy at first but this can be easily overcome with playful love tactics.

He will be on the move most of the time and don’t normally like sitting at home all day unless it is full of events. The woman that will have a long love life with a Virgo man must accept his adventurous side and be willing to be by his side wherever they decide to take off to. Trust you might be on the move quite a bit.


Virgo men like women that are the opposite of who they are but not in every way.  Some compatibility as far as likes and dislikes will help.  With a Virgo don’t aspect the Romeo for your Juliet because he will be totally clueless. You will have to be Lois Lane to his Superman to get love radiating throughout the relationship.

Author: Jessica Brown

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As women it's not easy for us to just end it with the relationship intimate thing and close ourselves off from getting hurt. So, when it does happens it's one of those things that once it is closed it's almost impossible to reopen even when you really want to. You finally find a great guy and it's time to be open, share feelings and perhaps even go beyond kissing, but something is keeping you from the full enjoyment of it. Most of the time it's the fear of being hurt again and wondering if there is something wrong with you the reason why the past happened the way it did. You don't have to stay stuck with being caged in. There are ways that you can get yourself through this with psychological proven methods. Here are five ways to get started working through the fear of intimacy:

You may also like: How to Get Pass the Fear of Dating

The first step to not acting on our fears is to recognize that we have them. The fear of intimacy isn’t a problem without a solution, but finding a solution means identifying that there is a problem. Having this problem may seem hard to relate to at first, since most of us claim that we want love in our lives. Many of us feel cheated or victimized by circumstance, while failing to see that our biggest obstacle is how we get in our own way. Whether it’s a worry of stirring up a past hurt or a re-creation of our childhood that’s at play, it will benefit us to gain a deeper understanding of our less conscious motivations that damage our closest relationships (Firestone, 2014).

  1. History Review - Look in your past where the relationship had ended. How did you feel right after the break-up? What were the main things that were said that hurt you? What ways might we be pushing/have pushed love away?
  2. Stop Listening to Your Negative Thoughts - The one's that say you need to dump him before he dumps you. The voice that says you need to go through his phone or sniff his clothes for evidence. Definitely the one that says you are not good enough.
  3. Challenge Your Defense - "It may have felt threatening, even dangerous, to open up to someone as a child or show our feelings in our family, but these same defenses are no longer constructive to us in our current relationships. Perhaps, pretending we didn’t care helped guard us from the pain of feeling neglected or invisible, however that same attitude will make it hard to accept loving feelings that are extended to us today (Firestone, 2014)."
  4. Allow Yourself to Feel - Whatever feelings that come up when you even think about being someone new or opening to a guy, allow it to be. Don't try to shut it off or dismiss it. Sit in it for a while until it dissolves on its own. Let yourself know that what happened in the past doesn't necessarily have to happen in the future.
  5. It's Time for Vulnerability and Openness - "Don’t call him for at least three days. Don’t say “I love you” first. Don’t tell him how you feel. Don’t let him see how much you like him. Being vulnerable is a mark of strength, not weakness. It means ignoring the voices in your head and acting on how you really feel. When you do this, you learn that you can survive, even when you get hurt. You’ll be able to live with more honesty and possibility, knowing that you’ve stayed yourself, even when the world around you wasn’t perfect (Firestone, 2014)."


Keeping your feelings bottled up just makes it harder to experience the greatest parts of a healthy relationship. It may feel like you have control but really you don't. The past completely has you under it spell if you don't take care it first. Real love is openness and sharing the greatest part of yourself with someone you care about and you can't put limits on that.

Author: Jessica Brown

Firestone, L. (2014) 5 Ways to overcome your fear of love. Psychology Today. Retrieved on October 26, 2015 from:

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You may think getting men to fall in love is not so easy and perhaps it is if you are only focusing on one particular guy. If you choose to date more than one man, the likelihood of having one fall head over heels is higher, especially if you use strategy. Getting a guy to love you can be done by using a formula and it works at least 80% of the time when utilized correctly.

You may also like: 5 Things Men Wish Women Would Do in Bed

Secret Formula to Make Men Fall in Love

First, you must understand once a guy has you chasing him instead of the other way around you have already lost the game of love. The beginning of the formula is to have him lead. Even if you find him super-hot, it is best to lay back and go with the flow. I get that this might be out of nature for some, you may feel your method of keeping true to yourself is the best way. So, how has that worked out for you so far? Probably crappy. It's time to switch the game and stop being so available. Even if it means purposely keeping yourself busy. Second, be eye candy and much more. Men are visual and want to see sexy which is the initial spark. However, to get him to fall in love, you must have your own sense of self and character. What do you like, honestly and without judgment, and how are you actively doing what you like? Having your own world separate from a guy you are going to date or potentially marry is a huge part of a successful and long-term relationship. Third, always speak in a positive tone and give compliments.

Everyone have problems and sometimes it can be frustrating when they arrive out of the blue - this is normal; however, keep drama and other situations a part from your relationship until at least a commitment is establish. If there is no way around it, discuss it with a light at the end of the tunnel. Too much drama at the beginning can turn a guy completely off and he may feel this is the way your life is all the time. Last, stay super confident. If you are not sure how, start by working on things that make you happy without a guy in your life. It could be dancing, singing, art or even just hanging around a best friend. A good confidence builder is also feeling good about your body. Start walking or change your eating habits for yourself. Eating healthy always makes a person feel great anyway.


This simple love formula will keep a guy interested for long-term. As I mentioned before, it works 80% of the time. There are other factors that come in to play that may not have anything to do with you which you cannot control such as his personal life and his insecurities. If a man is not ready for love there is nothing you can do. Also, there has to be natural chemistry and as Anthony Robins say "natures that are similar causes a long lasting bond". Your nature is your habit, morals and life desires. If those things are different there might be a problem where disagreements and miscommunication will tear at your relationship. This is why it is good to ask questions at the beginning before emotions start blinding your decision-making. Test the formula out yourself.

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It's becoming obvious the age of 50 is the new 40. Men are increasingly healthier and looking younger thanks to easy access to information for promoting good eating and exercise.  Older men are incredibly fit and sexier compared to the 1990's thanks to the booming internet and fitness centers popping up. There are also benefits to dating older men verses younger that you might not have thought of.

5 Reasons Why an Older Man Will Rock Your

1. Older men are wiser and know how to treat a woman with class. Opening doors and sending you flowers - you can believe it, chivalry is not gone when it comes to them.

2. Older men most likely are ready to stay with one woman. They are too busy maintaining their life to have more than one woman around. They are more content with just one hotty.

3. They have experience in culture and education so they have a lot of interesting things to talk about and share. It would be the end of boring conversation or wondering if your date has it all upstairs.

4. They are more supportive and have a good foundation financially. They have already struggled through trials and errors of building their career. An older man has their empire built and may only be adding more to it.

5. They are more skilled in bed and most likely will rock your world. Thank goodness it won't be his first time. He knows how to please a woman and most likely in ways you probably not have experienced yet.

Final Words

Next time you are eyeing an older man that is well put together remember the benefits. Smile back and think of how much he can bring into your life.  Also, don't forget older men want you to have qualities too. Most of them look for smart, well put together, independent and healthy women.

Author: Jessica Brown

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I get a lot of readings where women are waiting on a phone call or their guy disappears. The reason they came to me is because this wasn't the first time. They are confused because it IS a mix signal when you have a connection with someone and then all of sudden they are gone.

I always do my best to give pointers on how to turn this around, but many do not listen. Any relationship no matter if it is friends, boyfriend, fiance or husband takes two people to participate. It takes the right moves on your part as the woman to stimulate your guy into behaving the way you desire.

"You show people how you want to be treated by your actions." ~Anonymous

This is not a magic potion or spell. This is psychological proof that really works. If your guy is starting to disappear and you already know he has a busy life, perhaps your not the only female, etc., you can switch this around.

One for sure way that most women refuse to do is to stop calling the guy. Stop being so available. Stop allowing yourself to go into panic mode to search and rescue state of mind. Your guy is ok. He is also human. He has a life that pulls and pushes just like yours. Men also do things differently. When they are dealing with stress they back away. They are analytical. This means they have to take a step back to look at the entire picture. Men are mind creatures and think their way through obstacles while women, we tend to do things emotionally even our actions are based on it.

Because women actions are based on emotions we are not using our brain when it comes to love. We are not thinking clearly and we tend to over react. Not all of us are emotionally driven blindly, but some of us are especially when we think we are about to be hurt.

To get a man to chase you, you must allow him to lead. This takes a lot of patients on your part, especially if your not use to it. It takes taking BACK control by becoming a mystery and not so obviously there.

Tired of doing the chasing and not getting anywhere? Find out MORE ways to get your guy to start chasing you. Go Here:

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Here are 5 things that will turn a man on and keep him interested:

1.      Confidence – Find out what you don’t like about yourself and start working on fixing it. Stop complaining about how fat you are or that your hair is too and take action. Go on walks, a fitness club or join an active sport to get a body you feel good about. More confidence building includes getting your hair and nails done. This might sound superficial but you will be surprise how looking good makes you feel.


2.       Availability - You probably answer every single call or text as soon as you see it pop up on your phone. I use to be like you. I was so excited about getting his attention that I would happily answer. But did you know being too available can be a problem? You are leaving out mystery. You are letting him know who you are right off the bat and that has to stop. Being busy means you have a life of your own and that’s hot to guys.


3.       Yes Factor – Do you always say yes when he wants to see you or when he wants do an activity? Every once in a while it is cool to do what the guy wants, but try saying “maybe” instead of yes. Also offer to do something you want to do from time to time.


4.       Look Brand New – Guys love you too look like you’ve just stepped out of the salon and bought a brand new set of clothes. I’m not a fan of wearing makeup 24/7 but when you are first getting to know each other it is important to stay on point. Keep your hair and clothes looking fresh.


5.       Stroke His Ego – Compliment him on his hair, clothes, smile or selection of music. Men love to be complimented but don’t overdo it. At least once a date let him know he has something you like about him.

 Final Words

 Men are easy to figure out. Most women are over emotional and analytical trying calculate the poor guy’s next steps. “Does he really like me?” or “Will we really be together long-term?” These answers will come in time.  Just enjoy each moment you spend together and you will get awesome results.  Guys are basic creators and only want you to be your true self with those extra perks I mentioned before.

Want to know more about love and your love life?


Women Over 30 that Are in a Happy Relationship Thoughts
Women that are in a happy relationship think differently than you do.
Yes, they do. I noticed this about my married friends right before I took the
steps I’m showing you.

My married female friend was very happy in her marriage. Her thought
process was totally different than mine as well as how she handled men.
Married for 17 years she had a routine. Not to say everyday was perfect,
but she talked to her husband in a way I never thought of.

When speaking to a man you must be able to talk to him clearly and be
precise about what you want. When you are still holding on to insecure
thoughts and emotions you are not speaking clearly and not aware that you are sending mix signals. This then causes you to be upset about the
outcome of the relationship.

Women who are in a healthy relationship also know that when they are
upset to prepare for asking questions and express their feelings without
blowing up. Pick your battles, though. Don’t be a nagging witch. Only pick
the subjects to talk about that concern you the most.
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What I love the most about tarot is that it shows a possibility or a warning that you can certainly change.

Some think that once they get a reading bad or good that it is written in stone, but this is not true at all. In fact, the only time a reading might be a definite is when it appears in the exact same order after doing the spread more than several times.

The original tarot, laid out in a spread only shows a possibility that might happen and allows you to manipulate or change your thoughts and actions to get better results.

For example: Today I did a reading for myself. It was a general reading wanting to know how my day will go.  I received:
Three of Wands, Knight of Cups and Five of Swords  All Upright.

If you are not familiar with tarot and its meaning this is a 3 card spread.

This particular layout means in the recent past there was a collaboration of either friends or family to work on a particular task with the power of 3 - This could be three people or three energies (mind, body and spirit) and this will continue.  (Which is true, I was planning my teen cousin's birthday sleepover with her and her mom)

In the present moment a male will express himself to me that seems to be in love with being in love. I might receive a text or message throughout the day from him or even a visit (Valentine's Day). (Yes, I know someone that fit that description perfectly. Update: I did receive an text wishing me Happy Valentine's and we talked throughout the day.)

The near future is telling me to not be so overly giving with either my time, gifts or affection. It also says that I will get over some butt hurt feelings and gain new confidence with myself and independence. Possible suffered emotionally with an argument or disagreement that will all be smoothed out from this point on. (This is also true. Had a confrontation with my cousin and felt really angry and disrespected. I worked on just opening my heart and forgiving and it has made me feel better. Update: There was a moment where I had an opportunity to give a friend of mine their Valentine's gift early then when they was going to give mine. I decided to wait, taken heed, and present my gift at the same time they present theirs. I also decided to back off with communication a little and put my interest else where.)

Now that I have a slight warning about being too giving, I can adjust this when the time comes by backing off a bit and just embracing the moment. Stay true to my heart but also understand that overly giving my affection or time is not necessary.

This is how anyone can benefit from a reading. If the future does not seem to be what you want find out how you personal can do to change it. Again, nothing is written in stone. You have the power to change ANY outcome!

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