{"id":842,"date":"2016-01-27T21:32:11","date_gmt":"2016-01-27T21:32:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.keen.com\/newarticles\/uncategorized\/john-from-boston-used-tarot-gain-insight-fixing-family-dynamics"},"modified":"2021-05-24T20:07:23","modified_gmt":"2021-05-24T20:07:23","slug":"john-from-boston-used-tarot-gain-insight-fixing-family-dynamics","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wordpress.keen.com\/articles\/tarot\/john-from-boston-used-tarot-gain-insight-fixing-family-dynamics","title":{"rendered":"How John from Boston Used the Tarot to Gain Insight Into Fixing Family Dynamics"},"content":{"rendered":"<\/p>\n

\"Fix<\/a><\/p>\n

Every family is different. It can be fascinating to flesh out the family tree, as well as determine how your ancestors fit into the larger timeline of history. Tracing family roots, once a painstaking project of research, has now been made much easier by the availability of a myriad of online information and resources. In fact, these days, you can actually determine your unique ethnic heritage all the way back to your family\u2019s earliest origins, via the process of ancestral (or autosomal<\/a>) DNA testing.<\/p>\n

It may be fascinating to find out that you\u2019re one-sixteenth Native American, or that there\u2019s a good chance you\u2019re a descendant of the Hapsburgs<\/a>. But while such information can be useful in determining inheritance and genetic health concerns, such data isn\u2019t usually something that has a direct impact on your day-to-day interactions with parents, siblings, and other relatives with whom you must deal.<\/p>\n

The psychological temperament of a family profile not only holds the most sway over the choices we make in every sphere of our lives, from love to career to travel, but our family makeup also colors our judgment with regard to how we value our self-worth and the worth of others. To truly get a clear picture of the part we play in our family dynamics, and how each of our actions ultimately affect the family as a whole, the family portrait must be looked at as the sum of both genetic legacy and learned behavior. Only by examining \u201cnature\u201d (what we inherit) and \u201cnurture\u201d (what we learn along the way) are we able to grasp the big picture.<\/p>\n

Getting to the Real Root of the Family Tree<\/strong><\/p>\n

John, who could proudly trace the roots of his Massachusetts family back to the American Revolutionary War, to a distant relation who fought as a Minuteman<\/a> at the Battle of Bunker Hill, had more pressing family battles on his mind when he came in for a consultation.<\/p>\n

The eldest of three now adult sons ranging in ages from 23 to 31, John recalled his as a fairly idyllic childhood. His dad owned a construction company and his mom stayed at home raising him and his brothers. \u201cI guess that doesn\u2019t happen much anymore,\u201d he sighed, \u201cbut we were very happy.\u201d So, when I asked him to pull a card from the deck to represent his childhood, it was not surprising he selected the Ten of Cups<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, since his dad had retired and passed the business down to the boys, the picture had been a lot less pretty. Squabbling and bickering over the best way to run things had escalated into major fighting and drama. No one could agree on anything, and as a result, the business had suffered. \u201cThings are so bad,\u201d said John, \u201cwe\u2019re talking about selling up, taking a cut, and walking away, but it would break Dad\u2019s heart.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAll right,\u201d I said, \u201clet\u2019s see if the cards can shed some light on where you\u2019re going wrong and how you might fix things.\u201d I asked him to think about his two brothers and what their roles were in the current situation, then to randomly pull two cards from the deck.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The first card he handed me was the Five of Swords<\/a>. \u201cIt appears that one of your brothers cares more about winning and being right than he does about the implications of his actions,\u201d I said. \u201cHe\u2019s so busy trying to prove a point or come up with the next big thing that just runs over everyone in his way.\u201d<\/p>\n

John confirmed that his middle brother, Jason, did indeed seem to have a chip on his shoulder and was constantly trying to outdo his brothers. \u00a0Much of the current tension was due to dealing with the consequences of Jason\u2019s rash decisions. \u201cHe\u2019s always running off half-cocked, spending money we don\u2019t have, or promising things we can\u2019t deliver,\u201d John noted sadly. \u201cWe\u2019d talked about buying out his share of the business, but Dad wouldn\u2019t hear of it.\u201d<\/p>\n

The next card John handed me was the Page of Pentacles<\/a>. \u201cThis one is more of a dreamer. He enjoys the end result, but doesn\u2019t necessarily understand the work he\u2014and everyone else\u2014must put into the business in order for it to succeed. But, he\u2019s more someone who doesn\u2019t know better, than someone who is intentionally making things more difficult.\u201d<\/p>\n

It was true: John\u2019s youngest brother, Anthony, was more interested in being the drummer in his rock band than showing up on time for work. He liked being able to spend his share of the profits, but didn\u2019t really want to share in the responsibility for bringing those profits in.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt looks pretty hopeless,\u201d John admitted. \u201cMaybe we should just close it down and walk away while we\u2019re still speaking to each other.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, before you do that,\u201d I said, \u201cI want you to concentrate on one more thing. Think about your dad, and what he brought to the table. What did he provide that\u2019s missing now?\u201d After a moment\u2019s thought, John picked a card at random: the King of Wands<\/a>. \u201cThis is someone who did not take \u2018no\u2019 for an answer,\u201d I said, feeling the emanations from the card. \u201cHe was a decisive leader, and yet, very creative, and also very inclusive. He had a way of making people invested in his vision by making them feel that their contributions were truly appreciated.\u201d<\/p>\n

I suggested that for the company to have any chance, John would have to take over his father\u2019s guiding role, but he would have to do it in such a way that his brothers wouldn\u2019t resent him. \u201cEach of us has a role to play in our family,\u201d I said. \u201cIf you can be the leader without being the boss, you still have a chance of making things right.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, it\u2019s like I\u2019m the captain of the ship, but unless the crew is motivated, we\u2019re not going to get anywhere?\u201d he asked. I told him that was pretty much it, in a nutshell. \u201cOkay,\u201d he said. \u201cLet\u2019s see if we can get this family boat of ours \u00a0back on course.\u201d<\/p>\n

The next time I spoke with John, he told me things were much improved. \u201cThe first thing I did was sit down with my brothers to air our grievances. Jason told me he felt like I never took him seriously, and Anthony said he didn\u2019t realize how much we actually depend on him. Things are a lot better. It\u2019s still a work in progress, but at least we\u2019re headed in the right direction.\u201d<\/p>\n

If you have a family issue that you just can\u2019t seem to resolve, why not let a trusted KEEN advisor<\/a> show you how to get you and your kin back on the same page?<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Every family is different. It can be fascinating to flesh out the family tree, as well as determine how your ancestors fit into the larger timeline of history. Tracing family roots, once a painstaking project of research, has now been made much easier by the availability of a myriad of online information and resources. In …<\/p>\n

How John from Boston Used the Tarot to Gain Insight Into Fixing Family Dynamics<\/span> Read More \u00bb<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":34,"featured_media":979,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[186,187,565],"class_list":["post-842","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-tarot","tag-family","tag-family-problems","tag-tarot-readings"],"yoast_head":"\nHow John from Boston Used the Tarot to Gain Insight Into Fixing Family Dynamics - 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