{"id":944,"date":"2017-07-15T00:31:23","date_gmt":"2017-07-15T00:31:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.keen.com\/newarticles\/uncategorized\/reframing-heartbreak-getting-over-a-breakup-with-tarot"},"modified":"2021-05-24T20:05:16","modified_gmt":"2021-05-24T20:05:16","slug":"reframing-heartbreak-getting-over-a-breakup-with-tarot","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wordpress.keen.com\/articles\/tarot\/reframing-heartbreak-getting-over-a-breakup-with-tarot","title":{"rendered":"Reframing Heartbreak: Getting Over a Breakup with Tarot"},"content":{"rendered":"<\/p>\n

\"Getting<\/a><\/p>\n

Has a breakup ever sent your world into a tailspin? When you\u2019re not expecting a relationship to end, you can find yourself struggling to understand why things went south. The Tarot offers one way to help you put the pieces together and reframe your situation\u2014 it can even reveal aspects of a situation that might totally change your mind about the relationship. \u00a0It won\u2019t make the pain magically vanish, but it can help you get on with your life.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Broken Dreams of a White Wedding<\/strong>
Let me share one of the best examples I know of the Tarot totally changing the game for a person getting over a breakup. Jenn, 27, had just completed her doctoral degree in English literature and was doubly excited\u2014 not only was she now the holder of a PhD, but she was about to be wed to her long-term boyfriend, Patrick, 31. They had dated through the entirety of her graduate work and Patrick proposed a month after her dissertation, just like they\u2019d planned. Jenn had a glimmering ring, a wedding venue booked, and even a dress when Patrick walked into the bedroom one day with his head down.\u00a0<\/p>\n

He broke up with her right there, apologizing profusely. \u201cMy feelings have changed. I\u2019m so sorry, Jenn,\u201d he repeated like a mantra. Then he moved out, leaving Jenn in a half-empty apartment with her white gown hanging in the closet, perhaps never to be worn.<\/p>\n

Jenn called me a few weeks later for guidance. The hurt of Patrick\u2019s decision, which felt like a constriction in her chest, had gone nowhere\u2014 in fact, it seemed to be intensifying. \u201cI just want to know what I did wrong,\u201d she lamented.\u00a0<\/p>\n

The Three Fates Clarify Jenn\u2019s Heartbreak<\/strong>
My intuition told me that a Tarot reading would aid Jenn, who was mired in a myopic perspective of the breakup: that she herself was solely responsible. Because the deck is full of rich symbolism and readings weave together disparate events in time and space, the Tarot is an agile tool for deconstructing preconceived notions of a complicated situation. Simply put, Jenn wasn\u2019t seeing the whole picture, but the Tarot, like a pair of prescription eyeglasses, could help her refocus. Specifically, I chose the Three Fates Spread<\/a>, which unites the past, present, and future. In a breakup, putting the tragedy in a narrative frame\u2014 as a single happening in a long and complex life\u2014 can help the mind reprocess rejection.\u00a0<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

First, I drew a card to represent the past: the Three of Swords<\/a>. \u201cAll is not what it seems,\u201d I assured Jenn. \u201cThis card, which shows three swords piercing a heart, indicates a triangle dynamic in love. I sense that Patrick has not been only half honest with you\u2014 his feelings did change, but not because you failed him. He\u2019s had a longstanding interest in someone else, a woman in his office, I believe. I have a strong feeling that they have texted and messaged behind your back. Expect them to get together shortly, but their love will be short-lived.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jenn stammered, \u201cAndrea!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs that the woman?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cShe must be. Andrea\u2019s another member of his team, and they also go running together. I\u2019ve always picked up a weird vibe between them, but when I brought it up, Patrick got upset. He said I was being possessive and jealous. So I dropped it, but I never felt right.\u201d<\/p>\n

Throughout their relationship, Jenn had downplayed her own suspicions about Patrick, and even now that he had left her, she was defending his honor by placing the fault for their breakup at her own feet. It just shows how much our \u201cguts\u201d or \u201cinstincts\u201d matter. \u00a0When we don\u2019t trust our feelings from the start, the consequences to our sense of self-worth can be crippling.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

The next card I drew for Jenn represented the present: the Moon<\/a>. \u201cYou\u2019re experiencing incredibly powerful surges of emotion right now, like a tidal force\u2014 abandonment, rage at Patrick\u2019s betrayal, loneliness, heartache, maybe even a little hope. These feelings can threaten to overwhelm you and send you into obsessive spirals of self-doubt and wondering. You must fight the impulse to fixate. Otherwise, you\u2019ll drown in whirlpools of \u201cwhat-if\u201d and \u201cif-only\u201d. But there\u2019s a flipside: in this season of heightened emotion and sensitivity, you\u2019ll be especially keen to new insights and wisdom. Consider your creativity supercharged. Are there any artistic projects you have going now?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cActually, yes. I\u2019m turning my dissertation into a book, but there are a couple chapters that have really eluded me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf you can, find a way to connect your hurt to those pieces of your book, and channel it. This process will create your most evocative, masterful work yet.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

For the final card, representing Jenn\u2019s future, I drew the Six of Swords<\/a>. \u201cThis card, which shows a boat passing through calm waters, is often interpreted as a sign of an impending move. I foresee that you will be given a marvelous job offer that requires you to relocate.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s interesting,\u201d Jenn said. \u201cPatrick and I were committed to staying put for his job, so I never dreamed of going elsewhere. But I did just see a posting for a tenure-track professorship in Pennsylvania. Perhaps I\u2019ll apply.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

The Aftermath of a Breakup<\/strong>
When I heard from Jenn a few months later, I learned how things had played out after our session. Patrick and Andrea went Facebook official shortly after, but fizzled out after a few idyllic picnicking selfies. Jenn had finished her book manuscript and had found a promising agent to represent her to publishers. As for the move, the position in Pennsylvania went to someone else, but the application review committee referred her to an opening in North Carolina that ultimately offered her a job\u2014 and an all-expenses-paid relocation. Jenn was still a bit dizzy from the jarring breakup, but life was changing quickly and for the better. It felt like springtime, she wrote.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Breakups always hurt, even when we know it\u2019s for the best. But when we\u2019re blindsided, being rejected can also leave us feeling confused, like it\u2019s all a tremendous mistake. One of the Tarot\u2019s greatest assets is its ability to put seemingly catastrophic life events into perspective, and a post-breakup consultation can clarify the subtle forces that lead to the downfall of cherished relationship. In some cases, a reading can reveal shocking details that, while upsetting to learn, ultimately free the broken hearted from wondering where they went wrong.\u00a0<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re struggling to move past heartache, Advisors at KEEN.com<\/a> can help you move on with Tarot readings and more.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Has a breakup ever sent your world into a tailspin? When you\u2019re not expecting a relationship to end, you can find yourself struggling to understand why things went south. The Tarot offers one way to help you put the pieces together and reframe your situation\u2014 it can even reveal aspects of a situation that might …<\/p>\n

Reframing Heartbreak: Getting Over a Breakup with Tarot<\/span> Read More \u00bb<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":34,"featured_media":979,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[68,461,464],"class_list":["post-944","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-tarot","tag-breakups","tag-relationships","tag-resolutions"],"yoast_head":"\nReframing Heartbreak: Getting Over a Breakup with Tarot - Keen Articles<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"An unexpected breakup can leave you wondering what you did wrong. 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