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January 7, 2010

Forgiveness: Releasing Your Karmic Bonds

Close-up of a troubled woman with hands clasped over her face wondering how she can forgive her cheating boyfriend

Forgiveness isn't just an altruistic attribute designed to make you feel good about yourself – it's a prescription for breaking those karmic chains that have been wound around you for many lifetimes.

We've heard all the platitudes about the consequences of not forgiving – it hurts only ourselves, it can make us physically ill – but sometimes we just don't feel forgiving and we want that person who hurt us to feel sorry. We hold onto resentment, even though we realize it's not benefiting our spiritual journey and know it's keeping us from finding love that's nurturing & harmonious. But let's face it: Sometimes human emotion takes center stage and overrides spiritual wisdom; our noble aspiration toward granting forgiveness falls short in the face of our need to dole out a little retribution, so we arm ourselves with enough resentment to use as both a weapon and a cloak of defense. But when resentment and demanding comeuppance are patterned behaviors that repeat themselves over and over, more than likely karmic bonds and not human inclinations are perpetuating our behaviors.

Resentment is a negative energy that will attract us to negative situations, even in our casual relationships. Holding a grudge against a former friend or spreading gossip about that co-worker who treated us unfairly will restrict harmonious interaction in all our relationships. Because we often tend to wrap old hurts around us like a cocoon, we stay cloistered inside that bubble of resentment and lash out at everybody when we feel maligned; we keep emotionally returning to situations that wounded us, falsely believing that if somebody pays for the pain, it will go away. The problem is, it doesn't go away because collecting a debt on emotional injustice doesn't belong to our human existence, it belongs to our soul existence; and the key to releasing the karma attached to our soul is learning to forgive. The difficulty, however, can be figuring out whom to forgive.

Complications within a particular relationship are sometimes the result of karmic debt, but they may also be the result of soul memories from a former life. There's a difference: Karma is a soul debt that has to be repaid; soul memories are subconscious inclinations that motivate behavior based on events that happened in a former life – carryover memories – and these carryover memories can be the culprit that affects all our relationships, regardless of karma. A good way to start releasing karmic bonds and letting go of those soul memories is to call a psychic for a reading and get some help sorting the memories from the actual karmic debt.

It's doubtful you would be able to accomplish this karmic unraveling by yourself; it's like the old saying "You can't see the forest for the trees," because it's almost impossible to separate your own feelings from the facts. Your opinions have been colored by your experiences, thereby making them unreliable. Most psychics will tell you that although they have remarkable accuracy reading for their clients, they don't often read for themselves or close friends and relatives for that very reason. You need a neutral third party who is able to identify the karma without being influenced by familiarity. A psychic provides an insightful and unbiased evaluation about behaviors that may be affecting your relationships.

It may be that a person with whom you're having difficulty continually levied hurt and injustice on you in a previous life, and throughout that lifetime you were unable to forgive. Perhaps in the afterlife evaluation you both agreed to do the relationship again in order for that person to have the choice to change the behavior and to give you the opportunity to experience being forgiving. In this case, your inability to forgive in this life may be keeping the both of you from spiritually progressing. Or maybe in a former life, you were the one who inflicted pain and you agreed to come back and experience being on the receiving end so that your soul could understand the damaging consequences of that behavior.

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In both these cases, once you experience the painful disharmony in this life, the karmic debt is paid; you can let go of patterned behavior based on those old hurts and move on without guilt or negative spiritual consequence. Emotional pain can be a powerful imprint that attaches itself to your spiritual energy and follow you for many lifetimes. A psychic helps you recognize and identify the barriers that may be keeping you from finding love that's fulfilling (including self-love, an important element of your spiritual evolution) and will help you release the karma that's affecting your happiness.

Once you've made that call to a psychic, how do you break those chains and stamp "paid" on your karma scorecard? What can a psychic do to change your behavior in a relationship? A psychic can't change your behavior; only you can do that, and that's a free-will choice. Karma has had many lifetimes to wrap its effects around you layer by layer. It must be traced back to its beginning in order to evaluate the consequence it has had on your ability to find love that's balanced and nurturing, and on its perpetuating disharmonious relationships. Clearly, you must have help in deciphering your karmic trail and that's what psychics do – they trace your karma back to its origin and help you unwrap those layers of resentment that have been keeping you under karmic lock and key.

Accepting continual disharmony in your life and harboring resentment about it doesn't equate to forgiveness. You should never stay in a dysfunctional relationship, but you must forgive the actions so that you can spiritually evolve; that doesn't mean you have to feel warm and fuzzy in order to forgive, nor do you have to forget about any injustice done to you; you just have to stop demanding continual payment for it. Forgiveness is a spiritual choice, not an emotional feeling; you don't have to stay buddies with that person who wronged you in order to lighten your karmic load. Choose to forgive, let it go and move on. Your spiritual energy will change to a positive energy and lead you toward harmonious relationships.

Forgiveness is a simple concept that's complicated by karma. Learn how to release those karmic bonds and move your soul up from the karmic dungeon. A psychic is a great teacher!

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