3 Questions to Ask About Your Love Life This Libra New Moon
This weekend’s Libra new moon comes with a little romantic homework. With Venus, the planet of love, retrograde, the focus is on what’s already happening between you and another person. And once you start looking, something you’ve been trying to overlook might become harder to shrug off.
If you’re tired of a relationship that keeps going back and forth, you probably don’t need another reminder to be patient. You’d like to know whether all that patience is getting you anywhere. Before giving this connection more of your time, ask yourself these three questions.
1. Do I like what we have, or what I hope it could become?
It’s easy to get ahead of yourself when you like someone. A great weekend together turns into thoughts about the next vacation, meeting the family, maybe even sharing a place. Meanwhile, you haven’t quite figured out whether you can count on seeing them next Friday.
Enjoy the daydream. Then check how you feel about the relationship you’re actually having. Are you happy with how often you see each other? Do you feel comfortable asking for what you want? Would you choose this arrangement if you knew it would stay this way for a while?
That last question can be revealing. Sometimes you’re happy to take your time. Other times, you realize you’ve been waiting for a version of the relationship that neither of you has agreed to.
If you keep talking yourself out of a concern, take a look at these signs you’re ignoring your intuition in dating. You don’t have to act on every doubt, but it’s worth finding out what keeps bringing it back.
Ask yourself: What do I enjoy about this relationship today, without adding “once things change”?
2. Am I getting the effort I keep giving?
Being thoughtful comes naturally when you care about someone. You remember their big meeting, pick up their favorite dinner, and make time to hear about their day. It feels good to do those things. It would also feel good to have someone think of you without a reminder.
Your partner won’t show affection exactly the way you do. But you should be able to name a few ways they make your life better, even if those gestures look different from yours.
If you’re struggling to do that, start with what you miss. Maybe you’d love them to organize a night together. Maybe you need more help at home so you’re not exhausted by the time you finally sit down with each other.
Tell them. “I’d really love for you to plan something for us this week” gives them a clear place to start. Then see whether they make the effort. You shouldn’t have to turn every request into a project you supervise.
Ask yourself: Where would a little more effort from them make the biggest difference to me?
3. What would need to change for me to say yes?
When someone you still care about asks for another chance, it can be tempting to skip straight to the reunion. You’ve missed them. They’ve missed you. For a moment, that seems like enough.
Before making plans, talk about what went wrong. If commitment was the issue, what do you both want now? If you couldn’t find time for each other, how would that work differently? An honest answer will tell you more than another promise that things will be better.
You have a part in this conversation, too. Say what you’d need, and be honest about what you’re willing to give. You might discover there’s something worth trying again. You might also hear yourself describe a relationship you no longer want.
If that’s where you land, these signs you’re ready to move on can help you sort through the feeling. Caring about someone doesn’t mean every new invitation from them needs a yes.
Ask yourself: What would make another chance worth taking, and has anything changed enough to make that possible?
You may already know which question you need to ask. Take a little time with it before reaching out, especially if you usually get swept up in what the other person wants. If you’d like help talking through your own feelings first, connect with a Keen intuitive guide.
