We’re so used to hearing about how Mercury retrograde affects our lives. Except—so many forecasts never talk about how this planet impacts our love life! Mercury plays a crucial role when it comes to fostering clear understanding between partners, and considering what sign(s) Mercury is transiting is also important when understanding how the cycle affects us.  As communication is a crucial aspect of any relationship, it’s time to remedy this oversight and dive into what Mercury retrograde really means for couples.

Mercury Retrograde & Communication

The biggest place where Mercury’s backward motion affects our relationships is in miscommunication and misunderstanding. My client, Moira, offers a perfect example of what to look out for during a retro cycle. She called one morning, completely exasperated by her husband’s attitude.

“We just had this huge conversation about our finances,” she said. “I laid everything out on the kitchen table. We looked at expenses, income, ways to cut back. We even agreed on some specific strategies. And then this week, he calls me from the Yacht Club. He’s just bought a new chart plotter for the boat. He’s so excited. I flipped! It’s like we never even had the conversation.”

Their big discussion happened right when Mercury started a retrograde cycle. Though she thought she was being clear with her husband, and he agreed to their new money strategies, it turned out they’d had a huge miscommunication.

We did a three card reading on how she could best address the situation. The Five of Disks showed the situation: lack, worry, a temporary decrease in flow. The card representing the energy of her husband was the Seven of Swords.  He was in denial, possibly defensive, and employing underhanded strategies to get around their agreement. This card suggested she would need to diffuse his defensive reactions in order to get results. With Mercury still retrograde, it was unlikely she’d get a straight answer. For her “next steps,” the card was the Hanged Man, which suggested she take some time, wait for the retro period to pass, and then speak to her husband. As much as she hated to wait, we knew there would likely be even more miscommunication or misdirection during the Mercury cycle. She agreed to bide her time and check back in a few weeks.

I heard back from Moira about a week after the retrograde ended. She reported that she’d just had a discussion with her husband—with the Visa bill showing the $1500 charge for the chart plotter in hand. Because some time had elapsed, she wasn’t as angry. She simply asked him what was in his head regarding their previous discussion. Turns out, he had been so stressed by the conversation, feeling she was blaming him for their money woes, that he’d made only a superficial effort to engage. He didn’t hear what she was actually saying about developing long-term strategies. He had no excuse for the purchase, but they were able to have another conversation that yielded real results. She made it clear that their finances were not just his fault and that she needed them to work together to solve their problems. He agreed, and they put a strategy in writing to make it even clearer.

How Mercury’s Sign in Retrograde Makes a Difference

This little planet doesn’t always go backward in the same sign. As with other planets, the sign where Mercury is operating flavors the energy of the retrograde. This month, the retro period starts on December 19, at around 15 degrees of Capricorn, and finishes on January 8, at around 28 degrees of Sagittarius.

In terms of your love life, what influence does Capricorn bring? This sign of responsibility, integrity, work, and goal-setting will impact the practical aspects of your relationship. If you need to be in communication about joint finances, projects, or long-term relationship goals, the best use of the retrograde is to review and revisit these things rather than making clear cut decisions, signing contracts, or making big investment shifts. If you need to have a conversation about parenting responsibilities, sharing of home chores, or even future care for elderly parents, now is the time to bounce ideas around, but don’t make decisions. Instead, take notes on your conversations to revisit later.

If you must make hard choices, make sure that contracts and agreements are clear and in writing. Be prepared to revisit them at a later date as well.

Mercury’s time to revisit Sagittarius will be brief but will offer you and your loved one a chance to review the year and your broader hopes for the future. Sagittarius is an optimistic sign that governs beliefs, philosophy, spirituality, travel, and the broadening of horizons. As the New Year begins, you can spend time together daydreaming about the future. Where would you like to go? What new area of life would you like to explore? Mercury in Sagittarius can highlight a desire to take classes, learn a language, or explore meditation together. Again, don’t sign on the dotted line for a vacation package yet—just have fun exploring the details.

A psychic advisor can help you untangle relationship miscommunications and direct you to the best course of action. Take a look at advisors with astrological knowledge and leverage their expertise to help you have the most peaceful Mercury retrograde possible. Combining the energy of astrology with intuitive guidance can create a win-win holiday season for you and your loved one.

Not sure how to address communications with your loved one, especially with Mercury going retro? Call upon the expert guidance of an advisor on Keen today!