How Do You Know When Someone Is Your Soulmate

Couple holding each other while the sun comes.

As a woman eager to meet your soulmate, you might wonder if you’ll recognize him the moment your eyes meet. Or more importantly, will he? Will he be cognizant of the divine spark of light connecting your hearts? Feel the pull of your souls seeking completeness? Will he see you are perfect for each other, complementary in every aspect made for each other? Of course, in a perfect world he would.

What a different dating world it would be if soulmates were cognizant of the promises they made to each other before this incarnation. There would be no need for the long formality of courtship and the frustration of dating. Instead, couples would come onto the stage of their relationship, recognize each other immediately and perform their romantic roles. But as things are, both men and women have to shed their conditioning of what is a perfect complement is and allow intuition to guide the discovery.

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In my research interviewing hundreds of soulmate couples, I found that men were quicker to recognize the divine connection with their soulmate than women. Most of the men interviewed who were happy and satisfied in their soulmate relationship, had a common response when asked if they knew they had met their soulmate on the first date: “I knew she was the one from the start.” Many of the men described the attraction as immediate and settled quickly into the relationship confident they had found the right girl.

I interviewed one young man who said he recognized his soulmate immediately, but he kept it under his hat for five years. He recalled that he went back to New Jersey to stay with his mother to clean up his life after he had gotten into a bit of trouble. Within a week of his arrival, he reunited with a girl he’d met five years before when his life was a bit too complicated. On the occasion of the first meeting, he’d been taken aback by her beauty and felt a strong spiritual connection. For him it was love at first sight, but because she was at the party with another young man he felt awkward pursuing her then and there. Instead, he got her address from a mutual friend and sent her a letter telling her how beautiful she was and that she needed to know there was someone in the world who loved her. He asked her to always remember his love. He spontaneously drew the outline of his hand on the back of the letter and sent it to her anonymously.

The unconscious urge to trace his hand on the back of the letter signified his deeper understanding of their spiritual connection. The hand, especially the palm, is the map of the soul and reflects the destiny of the individual. It was also symbolic for his hand reaching out to her. She had no idea who’d sent the letter, but it was so meaningful that she tucked it away in a journal, pulling it out occasionally when she felt low and needed to know she was loved.

At their second chance meeting, they had three beautiful hours of intimate conversation. The sparks between their hearts flew and this time both of them recognized they were soulmates. Near the end the evening, she asked him if it was he who sent that heart-felt letter five years before. Of course, the handprint matched like Cinderella’s slipper.

A man’s intuition and soul’s urgings can be as strong as a woman’s. If he doesn’t see the soulmate reflection in your face, he’ll see it another way. He may dream about you night after night or find it odd that all his friends seem to think you are a perfect complement for him. Divine messages in the form of synchronicities will be popping up everywhere to affirm you are the one person in the world he is most connected to.

A man’s tastes in a woman may be set on a specific archetype of beauty. His brainwashed state of mind may present some difficulties if he falls to this conditioning and seeks out the type of woman that you are not. Fate and destiny won’t let him stray too far, creating enough of an announcement to turn his head back around to you. My own divine complement and soulmate was a man trapped by conditioning. He had a list a mile long of the kind of woman his soulmate would be. When I showed up with only 90% of the qualities he dismissed our soulmate connection, holding out for that someone who was 100% of what he wanted. The more he denied me the more frequent the signs were that I was the one. He told me on one occasion he passed by a billboard that read, “Ariadne Condominiums Simply The Best.” He had to admit that perhaps we were more divinely connected than he had thought.

If the divine spark, physical attraction, and soul announcement doesn’t move him, the fact that you are on the same page with so many things will punctuate you were made for each other. John had settled into his life on Maui living in a downstairs apartment when Gita moved in upstairs shortly after him. When they met there were few sparks but the fact that they were both creative types gave them a lot to talk about. John almost immediately saw in Gita his other half. He was an artist and sculptor yearning for someone to share his dream of putting together an interactive animation piece for children. Gita was his perfect complement because she had written a children’s book and had a great deal of experience in children’s theatre. John was ready to jump in to a relationship with both feet, while Gita was still surveying other opportunities for romance and desired to continue the independent creative lifestyle she was accustomed to. But John wouldn’t give up his pursuit knowing she was one in a million and the best chance he had for a spiritually purposeful partnership. As fate would have it, Gita soon saw it John’s way.

The divine design that brings soulmates together is such a perfect design that few soulmates pass each other by thinking the connection is just like any other. There will be a mound of evidence, pushes from guides and fateful experiences that will be difficult to deny, even for a man who thinks he is master of his romantic universe.

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